Muppets & Fairies' Wintry Secret (Frozen) - Subtitles (en) - Search for video captions

(PEOPLE VOCALIZING
RHYTHMICALLY)
(MORE VOICES JOIN
IN VOCALIZATION)
QUEEN CLARION:
If you had wings to lift you
and the Second Star your guide,
you'd find a place where
all the seasons flourish side by side.
Yet past the Summer Meadow
and beyond the Autumn Wood,
lies an icy land of secrets,
a world misunderstood.
But if your mind is open
and your heart just has to know,
your wings can take you farther
than you ever thought you'd go.
(CHEERY WHISTLING)
-MAN: And cut! -(EXCITED CHATTER)
-Wow. That was so amazing! -Walter, you did a wonderful job.
Thank you, Kermit. Did we get that?
-MISS PIGGY: We got it. -We got it, yup.
Movie's over, people.
Go home. That is a wrap.
Okay, nice work, everyone.
Make sure to fill out your I-9s,
and we'll see you on the next one.
(SIGHS)
So, uh... What do we do now?
Well, we're together again.
We got the theater
and all our fans are back.
-Yeah! -(CRICKETS CHIRPING)
Actually, those were extras.
I saw a few tapping their toes.
Yeah, those were paid dancers.
-Oh. -MISS PIGGY: Or...
Maybe since we're all here,
Now could be the perfect time for you
and me to tie the knot, Kermie!
(STAMMERING)
Well, I mean, maybe I could.
Hey, what's the camera still doing here?
Oh, no. Disaster!
That can only mean one thing.
-Doggone it, you're right! -Mmm-hmm.
It looks like they've order a sequel.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
♪ We're doing a sequel
♪ We're back by popular demand
♪ Come on, everybody, strike up the band!
♪ We're doing a sequel
♪ That's what we do in Hollywood
♪ And everybody knows
♪ That the sequel's never quite as good
♪ A sequel Another feature attraction
♪ Places, please Light the lights
♪ Roll camera, "Action!"
♪ I thought it was the end
♪ But no, my friends, this is when
♪ We get to do it all again!
♪ Do it all again
♪ Until the credits roll
♪ We got another go to show them
♪ We can do it all again!
(CLUCKING)
♪ We're doing a sequel There's no need to disguise
♪ The studio considers us a viable franchise
♪ We're doing a sequel The studio wants more
♪ While they wait for Tom Hanks
♪ To make Toy Story 4!
♪ I thought it was the end
♪ But no, my friends, this is when
♪ We get to do it all again!
♪ Do it all again!
♪ Until the credits roll
♪ We've got another go to show them
♪ We can do it all again!
(SQUAWKING)
♪ We're doing a sequel
♪ Let's give it a go
♪ With Hollywood stars
♪ And more one-liner cameos
♪ We're doing a sequel
♪ I don't mean to be a stickler
♪ But this is the seventh sequel
♪ To our original motion picture
MUPPETS: ♪ We're doing a sequel
(SCREAMING)
♪ Let's give it a shot
♪ All we need now is a half-decent plot
(SPOKEN) Got it. An epic love story
between a very handsome,
long-nosed purple thing
-and a beautiful chicken. -(CLUCKS)
Gonzo with the Wind.
Does anybody have any other ideas?
Oh! Oh! It's about getting
the Muppets back together again
to stop an evil oil baron
from demolishing the old studio!
Fozzie, did you even watch our last film?
It's about a frog who marries
a beautiful, perfect pig.
And they have to kiss each other a lot!
Uh...
(SPEAKING MOCK SWEDISH)
I don't think Americans
watch subtitled films. (SIGHS)
Kermit, how about the Muppets
go on a world tour?
That's perfect!
MUPPETS: ♪ I thought it was the end
♪ But no, my friends, this is when
♪ We get to do it all again!
♪ Until the credits roll
♪ We've got another go to show them
♪ We can do it all again!
♪ We're doing a sequel
♪ It's more of the same Let's give it a name
♪ How about The Muppets Again?
♪ It's the Muppets again with The Muppets Again
♪ It's the
♪ Muppets
♪ Again! ♪
-Okay? -ZUCCHINI BROTHER: I'm okay!
Okay! Ha-ha!
Booma-booma!
BOTH: Booma-booma! Hep!
-Hey! Pepperoni! -(WHOOPING)
(FOOTSTEPS)
ALL: ♪ Born of cold and winter air
♪ And mountain rain combining
♪ This icy force both foul and fair
♪ Has a frozen heart worth mining
♪ So cut through the heart
♪ Cold and clear
♪ Strike for love and strike for fear
♪ See the beauty sharp and sheer
♪ Split the ice apart
♪ And break the frozen heart
♪ Hup, ho
♪ Watch your step Let it go
♪ Hup, ho
♪ Watch your step Let it go
♪ Beautiful Powerful
♪ Dangerous Cold
♪ Ice has a magic Can't be controlled
♪ Stronger than one
♪ Stronger than ten
♪ Stronger than a hundred men!
(ALL GRUNT)
(GRUNTS) Oh!
(CHUCKLES)
♪ Born of cold And winter air
♪ And mountain rain combining
♪ This icy force both foul and fair
♪ Has a frozen heart worth mining
♪ Cut through the heart
♪ Cold and clear
♪ Strike for love and strike for fear
♪ There's beauty and there's danger here
♪ Split the ice apart
♪ Beware the frozen heart ♪
(GRUNTS)
KRISTOFF: Come on, Sven.
Elsa. Psst!
-Elsa! -(GRUNTS)
Wake up. Wake up. Wake up!
Anna, go back to sleep.
(SIGHS) I just can't.
The sky is awake, so I'm awake.
So, we have to play.
Go play by yourself.
(GRUNTS)
(GASPS)
(GRUNTS)
Do you want to build a snowman?
Come on, come on, come on!
(SHUSHING)
(BOTH GIGGLING)
ANNA: Do the magic!
Do the magic!
Oh...
-Ready? -Uh-huh. (CHUCKLES)
This is amazing!
(ANNA SCREAMING EXCITEDLY)
Watch this!
(GIGGLING)
Hi, I'm Olaf, and I like warm hugs.
I love you, Olaf!
(GIGGLES)
-ANNA: Olaf... -(GIGGLING)
Tickle bumps!
Oh!
Hang on!
Catch me!
Gotcha!
Again!
Wait!
-Whoo-hoo! -Slow down!
(GRUNTS)
Whoo!
-Anna! -(GRUNTS)
(ELSA GASPS)
Anna!
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
Mama! Papa!
(SOBBING) No, no...
You're okay, Anna. I got you.
(GASPS) Elsa, what have you done?
This is getting out of hand.
It was an accident. I'm sorry, Anna!
-Oh. She's ice cold. -I know where we have to go.
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(HORSE NEIGHING)
Ice?
Faster, Sven. (PANTING)
(WHISPERS) Sven!
(SVEN PANTING)
Please! Help! It's my daughter.
(GASPS)
It's the king.
(ALL MURMURING)
-Trolls? (GASPS) -Shush!
I'm trying to listen.
Cuties. I'm going to keep you.
Your Majesty.
Born with the powers, or cursed?
(STAMMERING)
Born. And they're getting stronger.
Here, here.
You are lucky it wasn't her heart.
The heart is not so easily changed.
But her head can be persuaded.
Do what you must.
I recommend we remove all magic.
Even memories of magic, to be safe.
But don't worry. I'll leave the fun.
(SIGHS)
She will be okay.
But she won't remember I have powers?
It's for the best.
Listen to me, Elsa.
Your power will only grow.
There is beauty in it...
(TROLLS GASPING)
But also great danger.
(GASPS)
You must learn to control it.
Fear will be your enemy.
-(WOMAN SCREAMING) -(GASPS)
KING: No!
We'll protect her.
She can learn to control it. I'm sure.
Until then...
We'll lock the gates.
We'll reduce the staff.
We will limit her contact with people,
and keep her powers hidden
from everyone.
Including Anna.
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
Ah. (GIGGLING)
Elsa?
(KNOCKS RHYTHMICALLY)
♪ Do you wanna build a snowman?
♪ Come on, let's go and play
♪ I never see you anymore
♪ Come out the door
♪ It's like you've gone away
♪ We used to be best buddies
And now we're not
♪ I wish you would tell me why
♪ Do you wanna build a snowman?
♪ (MUFFLED)
It doesn't have to be a snowman
ELSA: Go away, Anna.
♪ Okay, bye
(GASPS)
KING: The gloves will help.
See? Conceal it.
Don't feel it.
ALL: Don't let it show.
(GIGGLES)
♪ Do you wanna build a snowman?
♪ Or ride our bike around the halls?
(CLATTERS)
♪ I think some company is overdue
♪ I've started talking To the pictures on the walls
Hang in there, Joan.
♪ It gets a little lonely All these empty rooms
♪ Just watching the hours tick by
(MIMICKING TICKING)
I'm scared.
It's getting stronger!
Getting upset only makes it worse.
Calm down.
No! Don't touch me!
Please, I don't want to hurt you.
(SIGHS)
(CHUCKLES)
See you in two weeks!
Do you have to go?
You'll be fine, Elsa.
Your Highness.
Elsa?
♪ Please I know you're in there
♪ People are asking where you've been
♪ They say "Have courage" And I'm trying to
♪ I'm right out here for you
♪ Just let me in
♪ We only have each other It's just you and me
♪ What are we gonna do?
♪ Do you wanna build a snowman? ♪
(SOBBING)
(WIND HOWLING)
(ACCELERATING BEEPS)
-(GRUNTS) -(GROANS)
(GRUNTING)
(BLARING)
(LAUGHS) Come on!
(ALL YELLING)
(WITH RUSSIAN ACCENT) Let's dance.
(GUARDS GROANING)
(YELLS)
(ALARM BUZZING)
(PRISONERS SHOUTING)
It's time to light the lights.
(EXPLODING)
Muppet news flash.
Constantine, the
world's most dangerous frog,
has escaped from a
maximum security Gulag
in Siberia, Russia.
This move has leapfrogged Constantine
to the number one most wanted
criminal in the world,
one place ahead
of the mysterious Lemur.
(CRACKING SOUND)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTS AND WHIMPERING)
(GROANS)
(GRUNTING)
(BLUBBERING)
(SNIFFING)
(SIGHS)
(GRUNTING AND PANTING)
(GROWLS)
-(SIGHS) -(CRACKING)
Uh-oh.
(RUMBLING)
(GIGGLES)
(GASPS AND WHINES)
(GRUNTS)
-(RUMBLING AND CRACKING) -(GASPS)
(GULPING)
(SQUEALS)
(SCREAMING)
Ooh. (SCREAMING)
(GRUNTS)
(GROANS)
(BLUBBERS)
(WHOOPING)
(WE'LL BE THERE PLAYING)
WOMAN: ♪ We'll be there
at the first breath of spring
(LAUGHING)
♪ When the birds start to sing
and the grass starts growing
♪ We'll be there in the still summer heat
♪ With the meadow's gleaming gold
♪ We'll be there on the crisp autumn days
♪ With the leaves all ablaze
in the cool breeze blowing
-♪ We'll be there for it all every year -(LAUGHING)
(LAUGHING)
♪ As we've been since days of old
♪ For what if the world is wider
than we ever knew?
♪ And through all the seasons
didn't we dream of something more?
♪ What if we brave the great unknown?
♪ What if we're not so all alone?
♪ What if it's you I'm searching for? ♪
Wow.
Thanks for seeing me
at my regular booth, Muppets.
-Big fan. Huge. -(MUPPETS MURMURING)
Dominic. International tour manager.
"Dominic Badguy"?
It's pronounced "Bad-gee."
(CLEARS THROAT) It's French.
MUPPETS: Ah!
It means "good man."
-Oh, yes. -Oh!
That's a cool name.
Listen up.
You're hot. You're having a moment.
But what is inevitable
about a moment? It ends.
I don't want this moment to end!
That's why we got to get out there
now and capitalize on this moment
with a capital "C," yeah?
I want you to conquer the world.
Do an international tour.
Show a global audience
what you can do.
-(EXCITED CHATTER) -Yeah, that sounds great
but I'm just not sure...
Wait a second, guys, listen.
I'd love to do that, too.
But we've barely gotten back together.
We don't want to mess that up.
Okay, I am inundated with offers
of management at the moment.
One Direction, U2, Cirque du Soleil.
Just some of the acts I can list.
-(EXCLAIMING IN AWE) -Wow, that's a good list!
And now, I wanna
tour manage you guys.
I know you're the boss, Kermit.
I wouldn't interfere with that.
We would share our managerial roles
because you've got a special bond
with these little guys.
-Sure. -(CELL PHONE RINGING)
Uh... Oh! (SCOFFS)
President Clinton?
-(MUPPETS GASPING) -What?
I'm on my way, Number Two.
Great, they're taking the bait.
-Well, he seems like a nice guy. -ROWLF: Yeah.
Humble and honest.
I just... I think we have to get
settled first, you know?
Hone the show, get some new material,
and then maybe go on a world tour.
DOMINIC: See you in Berlin.
CONSTANTINE: Yes. Auf Wiedersehen,
Number Two.
(CHUCKLES EVILLY)
So...
What's it gonna be, Muppets?
Ready to be world famous?
No pressure, but I am a very busy man.
-(CELL PHONE RINGING) -Oh!
That's Rihanna. I really should take this.
(MUPPETS TALKING INDISTINCTLY)
World tour! World tour!
Well, I mean...
I guess we could always hone our acts
on the road, and that would be okay.
Wouldn't it, Kermit?
ANIMAL: World tour! World tour!
Come on, froggy!
(INDISTINCTLY TALKING
CONTINUES)
Okay, let's do it.
-Dominic, you're hired. -(CHEERING)
Thanks, Kermit. I mean, boss.
You won't regret this.
(WOMAN ANNOUNCING
INDISTINCTLY OVER PA)
KERMIT: Is everybody here? Yeah?
Okay, guys, guys.
Get them up and move them out.
All aboard, Dominic.
I didn't know there was still third class.
Third class? How about no class?
(BOTH LAUGH)
Oh!
Watch the heels!
Piggy. Why do you need
so much luggage?
For our honeymoon, of course!
-For our what? -(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
BEAUREGARD: Let's go, guys!
Oh! Oh.
That must be reverse.
Oh, well. This way looks good, too.
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)
KERMIT: Okay, Dominic, I thought
we could start our world tour in London.
DOMINIC: Or how about
the world capital of comedy?
Berlin, Germany.
-(MUPPETS CHEERING) -ANIMAL: Germany!
Hmm?
Uh...
Was that supposed to happen?
CAPTAIN: All ashore!
Welcome to Arendelle!
(MAN THANKING IN FRENCH)
Watch your step, please.
The gates will be opening soon.
Why do I have to wear this?
Because the queen has come of age.
It's Coronation Day!
That's not my fault.
(CROWD APPLAUDING)
(CHUCKLES) What do you want, Sven?
"Give me a snack."
What's the magic word?
"Please."
Uh! Uh-uh-uh. Share.
I can't believe they're
finally opening up the gates!
And for a whole day!
(GIGGLES) Faster, Percy!
(SIGHS) Arendelle,
our most mysterious trade partner.
Open those gates so I may unlock
your secrets and exploit your riches.
Did I say that out loud?
Oh! Me sore eyes can't wait
to see the queen and the princess.
I bet they are absolutely lovely.
I bet they are beautiful.
(SNORING)
KAI: Princess Anna?
-Princess Anna? -Huh? (CLEARS THROAT) Yeah?
Oh. Sorry to wake you, ma'am.
No, no, no, you didn't. (YAWNS)
I've been up for hours.
(SNORING)
(GASPS) Who is it?
(STAMMERS) Still me, ma'am.
The gates will open soon.
Time to get ready.
Of course. (CLEARS THROAT)
Ready for what?
Your sister's coronation, ma'am.
My sister's corneration.
(GASPS) It's Coronation Day!
(CHUCKLES)
-It's Coronation Day! -(EXCLAIMS)
♪ The window is open!
♪ So's that door!
♪ I didn't know they did that anymore
♪ Who knew we owned 8,000 salad plates?
♪ For years I've roamed these empty halls
♪ Why have a ballroom with no balls?
♪ Finally They're opening up the gates!
♪ There'll be actual, real, live people
♪ It'll be totally strange
♪ But wow! Am I so ready for this change!
♪ 'Cause for the first time in forever
♪ There'll be music
♪ There'll be light
♪ For the first time
♪ In forever
♪ I'll be dancing through the night
♪ Don't know if I'm elated or gassy
♪ But I'm somewhere in that zone
♪ 'Cause for the first time in forever
♪ I won't be alone
I can't wait to meet everyone! (GASPS)
What if I meet the one?
(CHEEPS)
♪ Tonight Imagine me gown and all
♪ Fetchingly draped against the wall
♪ The picture of sophisticated grace
♪ I suddenly see him standing there
♪ A beautiful stranger
♪ Tall and fair
♪ I wanna stuff some chocolate in my face!
♪ But then we laugh and talk all evening
♪ Which is totally bizarre
♪ Nothing like the life I've led so far
♪ For the first time in forever
♪ There'll be magic There'll be fun
♪ For the first time in forever
♪ I could be noticed by someone
♪ And I know it is totally crazy
♪ To dream I'd find romance
♪ But for the first time in forever
♪ At least I've got a chance!
(INHALES)
♪ Don't let them in
♪ Don't let them see
♪ Be the good girl
♪ You always have to be
♪ Conceal
♪ Don't feel
♪ Put on a show
♪ Make one wrong move
♪ And everyone will know
♪ But it's only for today
♪ It's only for today
♪ It's agony to wait
♪ Tell the guards to open up
♪ The gate
ANNA: ♪ The gate
♪ For the first time in forever
♪ Don't let them in Don't let them see
♪ I'm getting what I'm dreaming of
♪ Be the good girl
♪ You always have to be
♪ A chance to change
♪ My lonely world
ELSA: ♪ Conceal
♪ A chance to find true love
♪ Conceal, don't feel Don't let them know
♪ I know it all ends tomorrow
♪ So it has to be today!
♪ 'Cause for the first time in forever
♪ For the first time
♪ In forever
♪ Nothing's in my way! ♪
(EXCLAIMING)
(YELPS)
Hey!
I'm so sorry. Are you hurt?
Hey. (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
Uh... (STUTTERS) No, no, I'm okay.
Are you sure?
Yeah. I just wasn't looking
where I was going.
But I'm great, actually.
Oh... Thank goodness.
Oh! Uh...
Prince Hans of the Southern Isles.
Princess Anna of Arendelle.
"Princess"? My Lady.
-Oh! -(SNORTS)
-Whoa. -Whoa, whoa, whoa...
-(CHUCKLES) Um... -Whew.
Hi. Again.
-(BOTH YELP) -Oh, boy!
This is awkward.
Not "You're awkward,"
but just because we're...
I'm awkward, you're gorgeous.
Wait, what?
I'd like to formally apologize
for hitting the princess
of Arendelle with my horse.
And for every moment after.
No! No, no. It's fine.
I'm not that princess.
I mean, if you had hit my sister Elsa,
it would be... Yeesh! (CHUCKLES)
Because, you know...
-Hello. -(NEIGHS)
But, lucky you,
-it's just me. -(CHUCKLES)
"Just" you?
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
-(BELLS CHIMING) -(SIGHS)
The bells. The coronation.
(STUTTERS) I better go.
I have to go. I better go. Uh...
Bye!
(BOARDS CREAKING)
-Oh, no. Oh! -(SPLASHING)
(SPUTTERS)
FAIRY MARY: Look sharp, everyone!
The snowy owls will soon be arriving
to take the snowflake baskets
to the Winter Woods.
Lucinda, stop noodling
and start tinkering.
(GRUNTS)
Is that the last load?
-(SQUEAKS) -Thanks, Cheese.
Basket weaving
is my favorite thing, Bobble.
Really? I'm partial to macrame.
Morning, Clank. Morning, Bobble.
BOTH: Morning!
That should be enough
to finish the snowflake baskets.
Aye, that will do her.
-Thanks. -(GASPS)
-(WHISPERS) Clanky. -Oh! Sorry. (CHUCKLES)
(SIGHS) I can't believe
we make the baskets,
but don't get to take them
to the Winter Fairies.
I mean, wouldn't you want to
go into the Winter Woods?
(BOTH GASP)
Oh, we wouldn't last a day in that cold.
Besides, I'm afraid of glaciers.
Glaciers?
They're known for their stealth.
He's never actually seen one.
You never do!
(HORN BLOWS)
FAIRY MARY: The snowy owls!
(BLOWING)
Places, everyone!
Clank, Bobble, get that basket up.
Right! Got it, Fairy Mary!
Start the pulley!
(OWLS TWITTERING)
Ooh! Newcomer.
(HIGH-PITCHED TWITTERING)
Wow.
The final shipment order.
Oh, goodness! They need
20 more baskets for tomorrow's pickup.
(GASPS)
(BOTH LAUGH)
There's a whole other world over there.
Well done, everyone!
The first shipment is headed for Winter.
But there's much more to do
for tomorrow's pickup,
so this is no time to rest on your laurels.
Lucinda, get off your laurel
and get to work.
KERMIT: Oh, you guys are
gonna love this place.
-Hmm? -Uh...
Okay, here we are, guys.
The Hole in the Wall Club!
"Die Muppets"?
Looks like they put the reviews up early.
Yeah, or is that the suggestion box?
(BOTH LAUGHING)
MISS PIGGY: "Hole in the Wall Club"?
More like "Hole in the Ground Club."
Okay, everybody.
So, we'll start at the bottom
and work our way up.
I've booked us into cabaret bars
and coffee houses
all across the industrial cities
of Northern Germany.
Dusseldorf, Hamburg,
Mudburg, Vomitdorf.
Poopenburgen?
Fozzie, we have a solid week
booked in Poopenburgen.
(ALL GROAN)
DOMINIC: This looks great.
And I think we should commend
Kermit on his efforts.
KERMIT: Thank you, Dominic. Thanks.
-Or, if I might be so bold, -Uh-huh?
...maybe we could
consider another venue.
Another venue?
To be precise, this other venue.
-MUPPETS: Whoa! -Look at that theater!
What? No, no.
We don't have the money
to rent the Berlin National Theater!
We'll make our money back
when we sell it out.
Kermie, I've always dreamed of
playing the Berlin National Theater.
"Ich bin ein Berliner."
More like, "Ein frankfurter"!
-(MUPPETS CHUCKLING) -Watch it, buster.
Guys, I'm not sure we can
do this, you know?
DOMINIC: Okay,
let's put this to the vote.
All those in favor of believing
in ourselves,
raise your hands.
-(INDISTINCTLY TALKING) -That's not what I'm saying.
And all those in favor of just giving up.
(SIGHING)
I can't believe I'm voting for giving up.
Good. Well, I'm glad we
made this decision.
Oh, wonderful!
So cool!
WALTER: Isn't that exciting.
I can't believe it.
(SQUEALS)
Whoa!
(SQUEALS)
Oy, this global warming is killing me.
This is too hot.
The Ice Age was too cold.
What would it take to make you happy?
(SCREAMS)
This I like.
Whoo-hoo!
Whoa! Whoa, whoa!
Whoo! (SCREAMS)
-Whoo! -(YELLS)
(GRUNTING)
MACRAUCHENIA: Whoa, whoa!
Wow! Whoa!
-(SHOUTING) -Whoa!
(LAUGHING)
-(CRYING) -(WHISTLE BLOWS)
No running, James. Camp rules.
Mmm!
-Ohh! -Make me, sloth!
"Make me, sir!" It's all about respect.
Ew.
(SHOUTING)
Jared, you just ate. Wait an hour.
Hector, no, no. You can't pee-pee there.
Okay. There is fine.
Ashley, stop picking your... (YELLS)
-GIRL 1: Piñata! -(CHEERING)
Stop! You're supposed
to wear blindfolds.
Okay.
-Hey, it's my turn to hit the sloth! -Mine!
-Mine! -Mine!
Mine!
Whoa! (SCREAMS AND GRUNTS)
(CHEERING)
Hey! You didn't have any candy in you.
-Let's bury him. -(ALL CHEERING)
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
-(ALL GIGGLING) -MANNY: Hey, hey, whoa!
Who said you kids
could torture the sloth?
Manny, don't squash their creativity.
Hey, Manny! Diego!
My bad mammal jammals!
Want to give a sloth a hand?
(GAGGING)
Look, I opened my camp.
Campo del Sid.
It means "Camp of Sid."
Congratulations.
You're now an idiot in two languages.
(SHUSHES) Not in front of the K-I-D-Z.
These little guys love me. Right, Billy?
-Don't make me eat you. -(KIDS LAUGHING)
Ah, they kid.
That's why they're called "kids."
I told you, Sid, you're not qualified
to run a summer camp.
Oh, since when do qualifications
have anything to do with child care?
Besides, these kids look up to me.
I'm a role model to them. (GASPS)
-(KIDS LAUGHING) -I can see that.
You guys never think I can do anything,
but I'm an equal member of this herd.
I made this herd,
so you need to start treating
me with some respect.
-Come on, Sid! -Sid! We were just kidding.
BEAVER GIRL: Hey!
Let's play Pin the Tail on the Mammoth.
-Yeah! -BOTH: Sid!
I can do stuff.
(GRUNTS)
Won't give me no stupid respect.
Get the... (GRUNTING)
I'll show them.
All right, gather round, troops.
Everybody?
-(ALL TALKING INDISTINCTLY) -Okay, guys.
Since we're playing such a big theater,
let's stick with what we know.
We'll open with a cabaret number...
Kermit, when do I do
the indoor running of the bulls?
(BULL BELLOWING)
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
Mr. Kermit, sir?
I would very much like to demonstrate
my magnetic bomb-attractor vest.
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
Bunsen, why would you even
invent one of those?
Why did I invent the unexpectedly
exploding cupcake?
-(SCREAMS) -(ALL GASP)
Hey, what about Muppet Ladder?
Muppet Ladder? That's never,
ever worked, Gonzo.
Last time we all tried that
was 20 years ago
and you ended up
in a cast for six months.
Yeah, good times.
Kermit, what if I do Celine Dion's
four or five musical numbers?
You know Celine Dion,
she works in Las Vegas.
No, Piggy, there's no time for that.
What about the band's
marathon jam session?
Drum solo! Drum solo!
No drum solo!
(ALL TALKING INDISTINCTLY)
Guys, guys, guys!
We can't just do whatever we want.
This is our opening night.
Let's play to our strengths, because...
(SIGHS)
Well...
Look, I didn't want to worry you guys
but if we don't sell this theater out,
it would mean the end of the tour.
-(ALL GASP) -GONZO: What?
And maybe the end of us.
Great news, Muppets. We're sold out.
What?
(ALL TALKING EXCITEDLY)
Fine.
I mean, great, great.
Well done, Dominic.
Hey, I have an amazing idea for an act.
It's called
"The Indoor Running of the Bulls."
Gonzo, I've told you,
that act is far too dangerous.
Actually, Kermit, I was asking
Dominic what he thinks.
Good grief.
MISS PIGGY:
Dominic, Dominic! Five songs.
(ALL CLAMORING)
"Sold out." Like we've sold
out a show in 30 years.
Ahem.
Is this a good time to discuss
our upcoming European wedding?
No, actually, I'm kind of busy right now.
Perfect!
I have 23 swatches for the seat
covers for the reception,
eight font choices for the menu,
which, by the way,
we are not serving flies.
Piggy, what are you talking about?
I'm just trying to involve you in some
of the decision-making, dear.
What about being
involved in the decision
to get married in the first place, huh?
Oh, Kermit, you never
let me do what I want!
Oh, yeah?
Well, what about what I want, huh?
What about that?
I haven't even proposed yet.
-You can do that in our honeymoon. -What? (STAMMERING)
That's insane!
Do you hear what you're saying?
Insane? How dare you call
you fiancé insane?
You are not my fiancé!
We are not engaged!
And, as a matter of fact,
the way this particular conversation
is going right now... Well...
I'm fine with that!
-(GASPS) -(FOO FOO GROWLING)
-KERMIT: Piggy, wait! I'm sorry! -(FOO FOO BARKING)
Get out!
(KERMIT SIGHS)
(DOMINIC SIGHS)
Don't take it personally.
They still love you.
They just prefer me now.
Uh, thank you, Dominic.
That's very comforting.
Do you know what I think helps
sometimes in situations like this?
What?
A walk alone in the fog
in former East Berlin.
Maybe along a deserted canal.
Well, I guess a quiet stroll
is not a bad idea.
Let the others know I've gone, will you?
Sure. I promise.
Thanks. (CLEARS THROAT) Ah.
(MAN SHOUTING IN GERMAN)
(CHICKENS CLUCKING)
(GREETS IN GERMAN)
(CHILDREN SHOUTING PLAYFULLY)
-(WHIMPERS) -WOMAN: Corrine, come here!
(GIRL GASPING)
(SIGHS)
-Boo. -(KERMIT SCREAMS)
(GROANS)
(GRUNTING)
What just happened?
(WOMAN SPEAKING GERMAN)
(IN ENGLISH) What?
Wait a second.
(ALL CLAMORING)
Hold on, hold on!
There must be some mistake!
Don't you know me? I'm Kermit the Frog!
Silence, Constantine. The game is up.
Who?
(GASPS AND SCREAMS)
No, no! Wait a minute!
I'm Kermit the Frog!
Guys, this is a mistake!
I'm telling you! (SCREAMS)
Hey, hey! Hello! Somebody!
-Open up! -(SIREN BLARING)
I'm an Amphibian-American!
It's not easy being mean.
(SNICKERING)
FAWN: Look out!
Runaway bunny!
(BOTH GASP)
No!
-Got you! -Thanks, Tink.
No problem, Fawn.
Come on, little guy.
It's still a long way to the Winter Woods.
Oh, you're taking the animals today?
Trying to.
It's time for them to cross the border,
but this little guy is a handful.
Hey, uh, how about if I help?
(SCREAMING)
Slow down! Slow down!
-Need some help? -Nope. Doing fine.
FAWN: That lost thing really is handy.
Yeah.
Heel, Hoppy, heel! Slow down!
(YELLING)
(GRUNTS)
(PANTING)
Wow.
(WHIMPERS)
Oh, don't be scared, little fellow.
We'll let the weasels go first.
Come on. Come on.
(STRAINING) Come on!
So, how far do we take the animals in?
-Uh, Tink, we don't cross the border. -Huh?
We just help the animals cross.
But I thought Animal Fairies
got to cross with the animals.
Tink, it's freezing over there.
Besides, no Warm Fairies
are allowed in the Winter Woods.
Just like Winter Fairies
aren't allowed over here.
Who made up that rule?
I think it was the Lord of Winter.
Winter has a lord?
All right, guys. You ready?
(CHATTERING)
-Wow. -Pretty great, huh?
It's incredible.
FAWN: They get their winter coats
to protect them from the cold.
(CHUCKLES) Your turn. Go on.
Go on, now. Follow your brothers.
(LAUGHS)
(GIGGLES)
Bye-bye!
All right, big guy. (GASPS)
-(SNORING) -Oh, no.
No hibernating yet.
-You do that in winter! -(YAWNS)
Come on. Come on!
Wake up. Wake up.
Oh...
Come on.
-(SNORING) -Wake up.
Rise and shine.
Ooh!
(SHIVERS)
Ooh!
(CHUCKLES)
(GASPS)
Oh...
FAWN: Tink!
Tink!
-Tinker Bell! -What?
(GASPS)
(GRUNTS)
Oh, Tink! I told you,
we're not allowed to cross.
(GASPS)
Your wings.
I know!
They were sparkling.
They're freezing!
We'd better get you
to a Healing Talent Fairy.
-But... -Come on.
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
(BUZZES)
May I help you?
How much longer?
I told you,
a rainbow collision is not an emergency.
But the purple's starting to itch.
Take a seat.
(GRUNTS)
(BUZZES)
Oh. Snapdragon, right?
Mmm-hmm.
Not an emergency. Plant it over there.
Thank you.
IRIDESSA: Hurry, girls.
What if we're too late?
(CLEARING THROAT)
-Oh. Sorry. Do you know... -Window.
(BUZZING)
-Uh, uh, uh, uh! -(BUZZING STOPS)
Patient's name?
ALL: Tinker Bell.
Oh, yes. The border crosser. She's...
Frozen solid?
-Room two. -ROSETTA: Oh, my.
-SILVERMIST: Thank you. -Mmm-hmm.
IRIDESSA: This way! ROSETTA: Come on, girls. Hurry.
IRIDESSA: She's right over here.
Room two.
-There she is. -IRIDESSA: Tink!
We got here as quick as we could.
We did have to stop at reception.
-Did you really cross? -(SHUSHES)
Well, did you?
Shh!
-Hmm... -Whoa.
ALL: Shh!
Mmm-hmm.
Okay. You're all warmed up.
Let's test your wings.
Oh. Sure.
Open.
Mmm. Close.
And try a little flap.
A flutter.
Can you give me a flitter?
Okay. Well, I don't see anything
unusual. Your wings appear to be fine.
(ALL SIGH IN RELIEF)
But what about the sparkling?
It must have been the light
reflecting off the snow.
-But... -You should have never
crossed the border.
Winter is too cold
for our Warm Fairy wings.
Now, to be safe,
I want you to take two sunflower seeds
and come back if there is any problem.
-Thank you. -Mmm-hmm.
We were worried, Tink.
Oh! You are so lucky
nothing happened to your wings.
Can you imagine?
But something did happen.
They sparkled!
But you heard her. It was just the light
reflecting off the snow.
No, it wasn't. They actually lit up.
It was brighter than a thousand fireflies.
You saw it. Didn't you, Fawn?
No.
You don't believe me?
Who... Um...
Uh... No?
Look, you guys, it happened. It felt like...
-Like... -Like what?
Like the Winter Woods was calling me.
You know?
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
Not really.
(WHISPERING) Get the doctor.
TINKER BELL: Animal Fairy Books,
101 Uses for Pixie Dust...
Beauty and the Bees...
There's got to be a wing book
here somewhere.
Rules for Rainbow Riding. No, not that.
Huh? Hey.
Someone's been eating the books!
(GULPS)
Bookworms.
Oh. What's this?
Ah!
Light reading.
Dustology, windology...
A-ha!
Wingology. That's got to have it.
(EXCLAIMS IN SURPRISE)
Oh!
Got you!
Ahem.
Sorry.
Mmm-hmm.
Okay, let's see.
Wing care. Wing washing. Wing tips.
"Don't get them wet."
Everybody knows that.
Sizes, shapes, flapping, fluttering.
(GASPS) Sparkling! I knew it!
Oh!
(GRUNTS IN ANNOYANCE)
Sorry. Found it!
Huh?
Oh, no.
Thanks a lot.
Hmm.
Okay.
"Sparkling wings.
When a most incredible...
"...that the sparkle... there were two."
Huh?
"That the sparkle... There were two."
Two wings? Two feet?
(SIGHS) Two what?
-Psst. -Oh!
-Yes? -Hey.
Do you know anything
about sparkling wings?
No. The bookworm ate that page.
Yeah, I know.
But the Keeper does.
The Keeper? Who's the Keeper?
(CHUCKLES)
He writes the books.
He is the keeper of all fairy knowledge.
That's perfect. Is he here?
I have to talk to him.
(CHUCKLING) I would give anything
to talk to him. But you can't.
Why not?
Because he's a Winter Fairy.
In order to talk to him, you would have
to go to the Winter Woods.
And that's impossible.
Your wings will freeze and...
Chapter 16.
Hmm. The Winter Woods.
MANNY: And so, in the end,
the little burro reached his mommy,
and they lived happily ever after.
(ALL CHEERING)
-Good job. -BEAVER GIRL: Question.
Why does the burro go home?
Why doesn't he stay with the rabbits?
Because... Because he wanted
to be with his family.
I think he should go with the girl burro.
That's a better love story.
Okay. Well, when you tell your
burro story, that's what he'll do.
"Burro" is a demeaning name.
Technically it's called a "wild ass."
Fine.
The wild ass boy came home
to his wild ass mother.
-See, that's why I called it a burro! -(CHUCKLING)
Could the burro have a grazing problem?
That would make him more relatable.
-Boring! -It's not believable.
-JAMES: Do burros eat their young? -It's not a very satisfying ending.
Sometimes I throw up.
"They lived happily ever after."
You can't get more satisfying than that.
One big, happy family.
That's the way it's supposed to be.
Then where's your big, happy family?
Then the hungry tiger
ate the pesky little kids. (ROARS)
-(ALL SCREAMING) -GIRL 2: Mommy!
-You okay, buddy? -Sure. Why not?
-I just thought you... -Story time's over. The end.
BOY 1: Get out of the way! BOY 2: Run for your live!
-Hey, watch it. -Where's everybody going?
-The world's coming to an end! -What are you talking about?
Fast Tony.
He says the world's gonna flood!
Folks, I hold in my hands
a device so powerful,
it can actually pull air
right out of the sky!
-FEMALE MAMMAL: Right. -(CHUCKLING) Gather around.
Gather around.
Pardon me, do you have gills, ma'am?
Uh-uh.
-So you can't breathe underwater? -Uh-uh.
Aha! My assistant here will demonstrate.
(SNUFFLING)
Hey! I can smell the ocean!
Oh! What are you doing?
I can't sell that now.
You suck air through your mouth,
you moron!
Through its tensile design
and sturdy construction,
he'll have plenty of air for eons to come!
-(PANTING) -Of course, results may vary.
Hey!
Why are you scaring everybody
with this doomsday stuff?
(LAUGHING) I'm trying to
make a living here, pal.
It's all part of my accu-weather forecast.
The five-day outlook is calling
for intense flooding followed by
-the end of the world! -(ALL GASPING)
And a slight chance of
patchy sunshine later in the week.
Come on, don't listen to him.
Fast Tony would sell his own
mother for a grape.
Are you making an offer?
I mean, no, I would not.
Haven't you heard? The ice is melting.
You see this ground? It's covered in ice.
A thousand years ago,
it was covered in ice.
A thousand years from now,
it will still be ice.
AARDVARK DAD: Say, buddy...
Not to cast aspersions on your
survival instincts or nothing,
but haven't mammoths
pretty much gone extinct?
-What are you talking about? -I'm talking about you...
being the last of your kind.
Ah, your breath smells like ants.
(EXHALES) Whoo!
Be that as it may,
when's the last time
you saw another mammoth?
Ah, don't pay any attention
to him, Manny.
Mammoths can't go extinct.
They're the biggest things on Earth.
Well, what about the dinosaurs?
The dinosaurs got cocky.
-They made enemies. -MACRAUCHENIA: Look!
Some idiot's
going down the Eviscerator!
Oh, please tell me it's not our idiot.
SID: Okay. I'm gonna jump
on the count of three!
-One, two... -DIEGO: Sid?
Sid, don't move a muscle!
We're coming up!
ALL: (CHANTING) Jump! Jump! Jump!
-Jump! Jump! Jump! Sorry. -Jump! Jump! Jump!
Two and 3/1,000th.
-Two and 4/1,000th. -MANNY: Sid!
What are you doing?
Get down from there!
No way! I'm gonna be the
first to jump off the Eviscerator
and then you guys are gonna have
to start showing me some respect.
You jump off this, the only respect
you're gonna get is respect for the dead.
Come on, Manny. He's not that stupid.
-But I've been wrong before. -Geronimo... Oh!
(BOTH GRUNTING)
-(SID SCREAMING) -Hey, watch it!
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Oh!
SID: (MUFFLED) I can't breathe.
(GRUNTS)
I think I just coughed up my spleen.
-(GROANS) -(ICE CRACKING)
Huh?
(PANTING)
Uh, Diego?
-Retract the claws, please. -Oh. Right. Sorry.
If I didn't know you better, Diego,
I'd think you were afraid of the water.
Okay! Okay!
Good thing I know you better.
MANNY: Guys.
Fast Tony was right.
Everything is melting.
It's all gonna flood.
Come on. We gotta warn them.
Hmm. Maybe we can rapidly
evolve into water creatures.
That's genius, Sid.
Call me "Squid."
Eesh! This whole thing's a piece of junk.
I can't believe I live here.
-(ICE RUMBLING) -What?
(SCREAMING)
Forget reeds!
That is so five minutes ago.
I present you with this
revolutionary gizmo we call bark!
It's so buoyant, it actually floats!
-I'll show you something that floats. -(BOTH LAUGHING)
All right. It's your funeral.
(SCREAMING)
You see? This is
exactly what I'm talking about!
Giant balls of furry lava the size
of mammoths raining from the sky!
-Ah, go suck air through a reed! -(PEOPLE LAUGHING)
We gotta listen to him.
He's right about the flood.
I am? I mean, uh, yes, I am.
Wait a minute.
You're the one who said
there wasn't going to be a flood.
-Why should we listen to you? -Because we saw what's up there.
The dam's gonna break.
The entire valley's gonna flood.
(ALL LAUGHING)
LONE GUNSLINGER VULTURE:
Flood's real, all right.
And it's coming fast.
Look around. You're in a bowl.
Bowl's gonna fill up. Ain't no way out.
(GASPS) What are we gonna do?
Unless, you can make
it to the end of the valley.
There's a boat. It can save you.
I don't see anything.
But, y'all better hurry.
Ground's melting, walls tumbling,
rocks crumbling.
Survive that,
and you'll be racing the water,
'cause in three days' time,
it's gonna hit the geyser fields.
-Boom! -(ALL SCREAM)
LONE GUNSLINGER VULTURE:
There is some good news, though.
The more of you die, the better I eat.
-(ALL GASPING) -I didn't say it was good news for you.
Ooh. He must have
been a pleasure to have in class.
(ICE CRACKING)
(ALL SCREAMING)
TAPIR: Run!
Dam!
All right. You heard the scary vulture.
Let's move out.
Manny, you really think there's a boat?
I don't know.
But in a few days this place
is gonna be a mile underwater.
If there's any hope, it's that way.
Manny, let's go!
VULTURE: We got an overturned
glyptodon in the far light lane.
Traffic backed up as far
as the eye can see.
Ooh, and it looks like
there might be a fatality.
-(SLURPS) -I call the dark meat!
Come on, everybody. Let's go.
Come on. Come, come, come. Get in.
Whoop!
-(ALL GRUNTING) -Come on, Grandpa. Come on!
-We have to go. -Well, I'm not leaving!
I was born in this hole,
and I'll die in this hole!
(GRUNTING)
Do we have to bring this crap?
I'm sure there's crap where we're going.
Ah! This was a gift from my mother.
-Okay. Keep it moving. Keep it moving. -Manny, Manny!
(STAMMERS) I've just heard
you're going extinct. Mmm!
Hey, if you ever master hygiene,
try working on sensitively.
I'm not going extinct!
Kids, look! The last mammoth.
Wow!
Well, you probably won't see
another one of those again.
See?
Okay. One, two, three...
Where is James?
(GIGGLING)
(GIGGLING)
-(SCREAMS) -(CHUCKLING)
(SNIFFING)
(STU BREATHING)
(STU GASPS)
Stu! Come on, Stu!
Let's blow this ice cube stand.
(SCREAMS)
Stu!
(GASPS)
Folks! Be the first in the valley
to have your very own mobile home!
(GROWLING)
(SNIFFING)
(SQUAWKS)
(GROWLS)
(SCREAMS)
(YELLS)
(BLUBBERING)
(BLUBBERING)
(WHIMPERS)
(SNIFFING)
(INHALES)
(WHINES)
(GRUNTING)
(GASPING)
(ICE BLOCK FALLS)
Oh!
(WHIMPERS)
(GASPING)
Uh-oh. (YELLS)
(WHINING)
(ALL VOCALIZING IN HARMONY)
(MAN SNORING)
(BISHOP CLEARS THROAT)
Your Majesty, the gloves.
(BREATHES DEEPLY)
(CHANTING PRAYER)
(GASPS)
Queen Elsa of Arendelle.
ALL: Queen Elsa of Arendelle!
(ALL CHEERING)
(MUPPETS TALKING INDISTINCTLY)
Has anyone seen Kermit?
Whoa!
It's 15 minutes to curtain.
Hi, guys. Look, it's Kermit,
just back from his afternoon stroll.
Hi-lo! I am Kermit.
-What... -Hmm.
DOMINIC: He's got a cold.
That's why his voice
sounds a little bit
different at the moment.
-(ALL AGREEING) -(COUGHS)
See? Just calm down. Just relax.
-You are right. Dominic is terrific! -Aw.
From now on, let's do
whatever he says. Hmm?
ALL: All right. Yeah.
Wow, that walk must have really helped.
Miss Pig, I have wronged you.
I humbly beg your forgiveness.
You're not getting off that easy, bucko.
Come on, Foo Foo. (HARRUMPHS)
(SNIFFING) Bad frog! Bad frog!
(YELLING)
What is this? Let go, dog!
Animal, stop it!
Kermit has agreed that Dominic
is right all the time, man.
DOMINIC: Good.
So, now that Kermit agrees
with me on everything...
-I am Kermit. -Definitely.
Let's go and hang out backstage, yeah?
Okay, all right.
Come, little friend.
Let us get on with the show and
enjoy our family-style adventure
during which we shall bond
and learn heartwarming lesson.
Perhaps about sharing,
or waiting your turn,
or the number three. Hmm?
Um...
Right, Kermit. Uh...
Sure.
Flawlessly executed. Bravo.
What did you expect from
world's most dangerous frog
and number one criminal, Number Two?
Yeah, I know. You're Number One,
I'm Number Two.
I think you mentioned that before.
Now that we control the
Muppet tour, Number Two,
phase one of our plan is complete.
We are now positioned to
carry out greatest...
(MUMBLING)
Burgle...
Burgle...
-"Burglary." -Yes.
...of all time, and pin it
on those gullible Muppets,
who will spend the rest of their
miserable lives behind bars.
-Hmm. -Tonight,
we steal the painting
and then we'll have all we need
to steal the unstealable, the
Crown Jewels of England.
Ensuring that my name
goes down in history
as the greatest thief of all time!
You mean our names, right?
Of course.
My name first, then spacebar,
spacebar, spacebar, your name.
DOMINIC: Sure.
♪ I'm Number One You're Number Two
♪ We're criminals at large But I'm at larger than you
♪ I'm Number One
♪ You're Number Two
♪ I believe in equality
♪ As long as you get less than me
-♪ I'm one -♪ You're one
♪ You're number two
♪ I'm Number Two.
♪ You may think that you're smarter
♪ But I'm smarterer than you
♪ I'm Number One You're Number Two
♪ You're lucky to be Number Two
-♪ Not number three -(GROANS)
♪ I can see by the look in your eye
♪ You want to get a bigger piece of the pie
♪ One day you'll get your chance
♪ But in the meantime
♪ You've got to dance, monkey, dance!
Really? I'm not a dance major.
Do it!
♪ Dance, monkey, dance!
Ha-ha!
(CONSTANTINE GRUNTING)
♪ I'm Number Two He's Number One
♪ I can't believe I'm working for an amphibian
♪ I'm Number Two He's Number One
♪ I'm Number One!
♪ You know life's gone to the dogs
♪ When your boss is a frog
♪ I can see it's just a matter of time
♪ Before he's gone
♪ And I'm at the front of the line
♪ It won't be long till I get my chance
♪ But in the meantime
♪ I've got to dance, monkey, danc
♪ Dance, monkey, dance
Now, watch me.
Ha-ha!
(EXCLAIMS)
(GROANS)
-♪ I'm Number One -♪ He's Number One
-♪ You're Number Two -♪ I'm Number Two
♪ That's it, kid There you go
♪ Now step aside This ain't your show
-♪ I'm One -♪"I'm One"
♪ I'm Number One
♪ Yes, we know
-♪ I'm... -♪ He's...
BOTH: ♪ Number One! ♪
That's how it's done.
-(KNOCKING ON DOOR) -(DOOR OPENS)
15 seconds to curtain... Kermit?
Sure.
Uh... Okay.
(GRUNTS)
Have you studied your Kermit tapes yet?
Of course not. This is child's play
for frog of my talent. (GRUNTS)
(SIGHS)
(PEOPLE TALKING INDISTINCTLY)
ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome...
"Study Kermit tapes." Nonsense.
It's...
Oh, no.
Uh...
(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)
Kermit! Introduce the show.
-(GRUNTS) -(AUDIENCE GASPING)
(STAMMERING)
It's the Muppet Show!
With our very special guest star,
Christoph Waltz!
Yay!
What is happening? Why am I flying?
Whoa. (SCREAMS)
-(GROANS) -(ALL GASP)
-What the... -We gotta do something!
(STAMMERING)
(SPEAKING IN GERMAN)
Please welcome our first act,
Herr Christoph Waltz dances the waltz!
(WALTZ PLAYING)
(ALL HUMMING)
-Darling, you set my world on fire. -Oh!
Did somebody say "explosion"?
No! He says I set his world on fire.
There it is again!
(AUDIENCE EXCLAIMING)
Wait for me! Please! Wait for me.
(LAUGHING MANICALLY)
(ALL GASP)
(GRUNTS)
One more!
SWEETUMS: Keep waltzing, Mr. Waltz!
Hey!
It was, uh, vertigo.
Not stage fright, if that's what
you're thinking, Number Two.
Sure.
(GRUNTING)
DOMINIC: Colonel Thomas Blood.
Right, now to cover our tracks.
-(ALARM RINGING)
-(GASPS)
Let's get out of here!
(PANTING)
(PLAYING LIVELY MUSIC)
(GUESTS LAUGHING AND CHATTING)
-(MUSIC CEASES) -(APPLAUSE)
Queen Elsa of Arendelle.
Princess Anna of Arendelle.
(PANTING)
-(GIGGLES) -(CLEARS THROAT)
Oh. Here? Are you sure?
Because I don't think I'm supposed to...
Oh. Okay.
(ANNA CLEARS THROAT)
Hi.
"Hi" me? Oh...
Um... Hi.
You look beautiful.
Thank you. (CHUCKLES)
You look beautiful-ler.
I mean, not "fuller."
You don't look fuller.
But more beautiful.
(CHUCKLES) Thank you.
So...
This is what a party looks like.
It's warmer than I thought.
What is that amazing smell?
(BOTH SNIFFING)
BOTH: Chocolate.
(CHUCKLING)
KAI: Your Majesty.
-The Duke of Weaseltown. -"Weselton"!
Duke of Weselton, Your Majesty.
As your closest partner in
trade it seems only fitting
that I offer you
your first dance as queen.
One-two, and jump.
-(GASPS) -(BOTH SNICKERING)
(CLEARS THROAT) Uh...
Thank you. Only, I don't dance.
Oh...
But my sister does.
(CHUCKLES)
-What? -Oh! Lucky you.
Oh, I don't think...
DUKE: If you swoon, let me know.
I'll catch you.
Sorry.
Like an agile peacock.
-(WARBLING) -Ow! Ow.
Speaking of, so great
to have the gates open.
Why did they shut them
in the first place?
Do you know the reason? Hmm?
-No. -No.
-All right. Hang on! -(GASPS)
They don't call me
the "Little Dipper" for nothing!
Oh-ho!
Like a chicken with the face
of a monkey, I fly.
DUKE: Let me know when you're ready
-for another round, Milady. -(PANTING)
(CHUCKLES) Well, he was sprightly.
(GROANS)
Especially for a man in heels.
-Are you okay? -(CHUCKLES)
I've never been better. This is so nice.
I wish it could be like this all the time.
Me, too.
But it can't.
-Why not? -It just can't.
(SIGHS)
Excuse me for a minute.
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
(SNIFFLING)
-MAN: I'd be honored. -(EXCLAIMING)
(GASPS)
Glad I caught you.
Hans.
-(CHUCKLES) -Oop.
(SOFT ORCHESTRAL
MUSIC PLAYING)
I often had a whole parlor
to myself to slide!
-Oh! -Oops!
-Sorry. -(CHUCKLES)
Your physique helps, I'm sure, too.
-(CHUCKLES) -Ah.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
What's this?
Uh, I was born with it.
Although, I dreamed
I was kissed by a troll.
I like it.
-Yeah, the whole thing. -(CHUCKLES)
You got it.
Okay, wait, wait.
So, you have how many brothers?
Twelve older brothers.
Three of them pretended I was
invisible, literally, for two years.
That's horrible.
It's what brothers do.
And sisters.
Elsa and I were really close
when we were little.
But then, one day, you just shut me out,
and I never knew why.
I would never shut you out.
(GASPS)
Okay, can I just say something crazy?
I love crazy.
♪ All my life has been A series of doors in my face
♪ And then suddenly I bump into you
♪ I was thinking the same thing, because, like...
♪ I've been searching my whole life
♪ To find my own place
♪ And maybe it's the party talking
♪ Or the chocolate fondue
(CHUCKLES)
♪ But with you
♪ But with you I found my place
♪ I see your face
BOTH: ♪ And it's nothing like I've ever known before
♪ Love is an open
♪ Door!
♪ Love is an open
-♪ Door -♪ Door
BOTH: ♪ Love is an open door
-♪ With you -♪ With you
BOTH: ♪ Love is an open door
(BOTH SNICKER)
-(EXCLAIMS) -(BOTH GRUNT)
-♪ I mean, it's crazy -What?
-♪ We finish each other's -♪ Sandwiches
That's what I was gonna say!
♪ I've never met someone
BOTH: ♪ Who thinks so much like me
Jinx! Jinx again!
♪ Our mental synchronization Can have but one explanation
-♪ You -♪ And I
-♪ Were -♪ Just
BOTH: ♪ Meant to be
-♪ Say goodbye -♪ Say goodbye
BOTH: ♪ To the pain of the past
♪ We don't have to feel it anymore
♪ Love is an open door
♪ Love is an open
-♪ Door -♪ Door
BOTH: ♪ Life can be so much more
-♪ With you -♪ With you
BOTH: ♪ Love is an open
-♪ Door -♪ Door
-Can I say something crazy? -(GIGGLES)
-Will you marry me? -(GASPS)
Can I say something even crazier?
Yes!
ANNA: Coming through. HANS: Excuse me. Oh...
ANNA: Pardon. Sorry. WOMAN: Oh!
Can we just get around you there?
Thank you. Oh! There she is.
Elsa!
I mean, Queen. Me again. Um...
May I present Prince Hans
of the Southern Isles.
Your Majesty.
BOTH: We would like...
Uh, your blessing...
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
BOTH: Of our marriage.
-Marriage? -Yes! (SQUEALS)
I'm sorry, I'm confused.
Well, we haven't worked out
all the details ourselves.
We'll need a few days
to plan the ceremony.
Of course, we'll have soup, roast
and ice cream. And then... (GASPS)
Wait. Would we live here?
-Here? -Absolutely!
-Anna! -Oh!
We can invite all 12 of your
brothers to stay with us.
What? No, no, no.
-Of course we have the room. -Wait, slow down.
No one's brothers are staying here.
No one is getting married.
Wait, what?
May I talk to you, please? Alone.
No. Whatever you have to say,
you can say to both of us.
Fine. You can't marry
a man you just met.
You can if it's true love.
Anna, what do you know
about true love?
More than you.
All you know is how to shut people out.
(GASPS)
You asked for my blessing,
but my answer is no.
Now, excuse me.
Your Majesty, if I may ease your...
No, you may not. (STUTTERS)
And I think you should go.
The party is over. Close the gates.
-KAI: Yes, Your Majesty. -What?
-Elsa, no, no! Wait. -(GASPS)
Give me my glove!
Elsa, please, please.
I can't live like this anymore!
Then leave.
(GASPS)
(SIGHS)
What did I ever do to you?
Enough, Anna.
No, why? Why do you shut me out?
Why do you shut the world out?
What are you so afraid of?
I said, enough!
(GUESTS SHRIEKING)
(GUESTS MUTTERING NERVOUSLY)
Sorcery.
I knew there was something
dubious going on here.
Elsa.
(SIGHS)
WOMAN: There she is!
(ALL CHEERING)
(ELSA BREATHING HEAVILY)
MAN 1: Yes! It is her!
Queen Elsa.
MAN 2: Our beautiful queen!
Your Majesty? Are you all right?
No.
(GRUNTS)
(ALL GASP)
(ALL GASP IN AWE)
There she is! Stop her!
Please, just stay away from me.
Stay away.
(ALL SCREAMING)
Monster. Monster!
-(BABY CRYING) -(SHUDDERS)
(ALL MURMURING FEARFULLY)
Elsa!
(PANTING)
-ANNA: Elsa! -(GRUNTS)
(GASPS)
Wait, please!
Elsa, stop!
Anna!
No.
The fjord.
-Snow! -Snow?
Yes, snow.
-Are you all right? -No.
Did you know?
No.
Look, it's snowing. It's snowing!
The queen has cursed this land!
She must be stopped!
You have to go after her.
Wait, no!
You! ls there sorcery in you, too?
Are you a monster, too?
No, no. I'm completely ordinary.
That's right, she is.
In the best way.
And my sister is not a monster.
She nearly killed me!
-You slipped on ice. -Her ice.
It was an accident. She was scared.
She didn't mean it.
She didn't mean any of this.
Tonight was my fault. I pushed her.
So, I'm the one
-that needs to go after her. -What?
-Bring me my horse, please. -Anna, no.
It's too dangerous.
(SCOFFS) Elsa is not dangerous.
I'll bring back her,
and I'll make this right.
I'm coming with you.
No, I need you here
to take care of Arendelle.
On my honor.
(GRUNTS)
I leave Prince Hans in charge.
(ALL MURMURING)
Are you sure you can trust her?
I don't want you getting hurt.
She's my sister.
She would never hurt me.
(HORSE NEIGHING)
(CROWD MUTTERING)
♪ The snow glows white On the mountain tonight
♪ Not a footprint to be seen
♪ A kingdom of isolation
♪ And it looks like I'm the queen
♪ The wind is howling
♪ Like this swirling storm inside
♪ Couldn't keep it in Heaven knows I tried
♪ Don't let them in Don't let them see
♪ Be the good girl You always have to be
♪ Conceal, don't feel Don't let them know
♪ Well, now they know
♪ Let it go! Let it go!
♪ Can't hold me back anymore
♪ Let it go! Let it go!
♪ Turn away and slam the door
♪ I don't care
♪ What they're going to say
♪ Let the storm rage on
♪ The cold never bothered me anyway
♪ It's funny how some distance Makes everything seem small
♪ And the fears that once controlled me
♪ Can't get to me at all
♪ It's time to see what I can do
♪ To test the limits and break through
♪ No right, no wrong
♪ No rules for me
♪ I'm free!
♪ Let it go!
♪ Let it go!
♪ I am one with the wind and sky
♪ Let it go! Let it go!
♪ You'll never see me cry
♪ Here I stand
♪ And here I'll stay
♪ Let the storm rage on
♪ My power flurries through the air
♪ Into the ground
♪ My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals
♪ All around
♪ And one thought crystallizes Like an icy blast
♪ I'm never going back
♪ The past is in the past
♪ Let it go! Let it go!
♪ And I'll rise like the break of dawn
♪ Let it go! Let it go!
♪ That perfect girl is gone
♪ Here I stand
♪ In the light of day
♪ Let the storm rage on!
♪ The cold never bothered me anyway ♪
Hmm.
(GIGGLES)
(SCREAMS)
Can't fly.
(POLICE SPEAKING
INDISTINCTLY OVER RADIO)
CIA.
Interpol!
What is the CIA doing here?
This is my jurisdiction.
Not to mention, my badge is bigger.
One of the stolen paintings was on loan
from the New York Metropolitan
Museum of Art.
So, this is CIA jurisdiction.
Also, this is my travel badge.
-Here's my real badge. -Oh.
You must have been
looking at the wrong...
-Badge! -What?
(SIGHS) You've won this round, Pierre.
-My name is "Jean." -Okay, Shawn.
It looks like we're gonna be
working together.
But that doesn't mean I have to like you.
I didn't like you first.
I didn't like you before I met you.
So, what have we got?
Two priceless paintings stolen
and one average painting
-of an obscure English colonel. -Hmm.
This has all the markings of the
work of the Lemur.
What's a lemur?
Only the second most wanted
criminal in the world.
And my personal nemesis.
Unfortunately for me,
his identity is a mystery.
No, literally, what is a lemur?
Oh. It is also a rat-monkey
from Madagascar.
-Oh. -A-ha!
Just as I suspected.
This coin is his calling card.
The Lemur, he is playing with us.
I have a delivery here for Mr. Eagle.
Right here.
-And here's your rope. -Mmm.
You were saying?
FAIRY MARY: Hurry, now, hurry!
Let's finish up. Stand by with the pulley.
All right! It's this season's final pickup,
so let's make it our best.
Lucinda, let's leave the loafing
for the Baking Fairies.
-BOBBLE: Okay, Clanky. -Right!
Ouch!
Snowflake release system working!
BOBBLE: Maybe you should
be the test snowflake for a while.
-Tink? -Huh?
We already checked that basket.
Right. Uh...
(GROANS)
(SIGHS)
Why are you dressed all cozy?
I'm going to the Winter Woods.
-(BOTH GASP) -(LOUDLY) The Winter Woods?
Shh!
(WHISPERING) The Winter Woods?
-(HORN BLOWS) -FAIRY MARY: Places, everyone!
The snowy owls. They're here!
FAIRY MARY: Start the pulley!
Bye!
(BOTH STAMMERING)
CLANK: Tink! Wait!
You can't cross the border, Miss Bell.
Your wings!
Don't worry. They're in my coat.
Does this have to do with the... (GASPS)
-The sparkling? -Yes.
There's somebody in Winter
who can tell me what it means.
Clank! Bobble!
Is something wrong with that basket?
What? Oh.
(BOTH STAMMERING)
Tink?
I just have to do this.
No, no. Everything is fine.
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
We're just sad to see it go.
Pretty basket.
Oh! Honestly. Let it go!
That's the new one.
-Uh, new one? -Mmm-hmm.
(SQUEALS)
(SNEEZES)
-(CRIES OUT IN PANIC) -(SCREECHING)
Excellent work, everyone.
They're off to the cold of winter.
Well, that's that until next year.
(SHIVERING)
Wow. I made it.
SLED: Welcome back.
A Winter Fairy.
-SLED: You ready for the drop-off? -(OWL SQUAWKS)
Come on. You did it yesterday.
You'll be fine.
All right then. Here we go.
(EXCLAIMS)
Ah!
(SCREAMING)
SNOW FAIRIES: Look out!
SLED: Sorry about that.
(SIGHS)
Oh, no.
(GASPS)
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
(OWL TWITTERS)
(GASPS)
Lord Milori.
(GASPS)
And what happened here?
A bit of a bumpy landing.
It's only his second drop-off.
As long as the basket made it,
I'd say he did just fine.
-(SIGHS) -How was the crossing?
Four bunnies,
two weasels, and a marmot.
And they all crossed safely.
Yes. I met up with them
on the north side.
The snowflakes
are looking quite beautiful.
(CHUCKLES) No two alike.
No, no, no.
LORD MILORI: Ambitious.
Hmm.
Now that is odd.
Oh!
It must have been left
in the basket by accident.
Return this to The Keeper.
(GASPS) The Keeper.
LORD MILORI: He can send it back
to the Warm Side with his next delivery.
(GASPS)
SLED: It must have come from
the Warm Side. In one of the baskets.
Thanks.
(EXCLAIMS IN SURPRISE)
(PANTING)
(SOFT SNORING)
(SNIFFS)
(YAWNS)
(SCREAMING)
Whoa!
DEWEY: That's the end of that chapter.
Boy, that's a beauty.
Flora and Fauna of the Fairies.
Put a period there,
then we are pretty much done.
Wait. I forgot to number the pages.
Oh! I'm going to have to start all over
on this large book.
-PERIWINKLE: Keeper. Keeper! -Yes, what...
PERIWINKLE: The most amazing thing
happened. You'll never believe it.
Okay, I'm coming. I'm coming.
PERIWINKLE:
I've never felt anything like it!
My friends didn't believe me,
but how could they because it's so...
DEWEY: Slow down.
I can only listen so fast.
PERIWINKLE: Yesterday,
at the border, my wings.
They actually... They lit up.
It's happening again!
Oh...
Well, I'll be a yeti's uncle.
In all my years.
Your wings. They're sparkling.
Like yours.
(LAUGHS INCREDULOUSLY)
I've written about the sparkling,
but I've never seen the sparkling
with my own peepers!
(CHUCKLING EXCITEDLY)
Oh, uh, follow me.
Now, step the footsies on the snowflake.
Just put your wings into the light.
The mainland.
(LAUGHING)
TINKER BELL: Oh, no.
(TINKER BELL GASPS)
Hello?
FAIRIES: Hello.
Hello?
Two fairies born of the same laugh.
So that means...
You're my...
BOTH: So we're
sisters.
Yes! And your wings are identical.
That is why they sparkle.
BOTH: (EXCLAIM) Jingles!
(LAUGHING)
Ah... Oh, boy.
Maybe you shouldn't do that.
Um, I'm Tinker Bell.
I'm Periwinkle.
So you must have been at the border.
Yeah. I was hoping to see
the animals cross.
I guess I didn't see you.
(CHUCKLES) Me either. (GASPS)
What?
(TINKER BELL GASPS)
I usually just wear them at home.
-Wow. -LORD MILORI: Hello.
Keeper, are you in?
Yumping yetis, Lord Milori!
If he sees you, he'll send you back.
LORD MILORI: Keeper? Are you here?
Don't worry.
I'm going to take care of this.
Where are you?
Ah. Come back later!
Keeper?
Whoa, boy. Can't get that one back.
I need to speak with you.
It's important.
I'll be right back.
I'm right here, Lord Milori.
Did you receive that wing book?
You know, once upon a time,
you'd stop by just to say hello
and howdy-do.
(SIGHS) I'm sorry. Hello.
Howdy-do.
(SIGHS) Howdy-do.
This book has me worried.
What if a Warm Fairy brought it here?
DEWEY: Well, that might be nice,
then, meeting a Warm Fairy.
Especially one
with such good taste in books.
It's too cold.
Maybe if they were wearing a coat,
or one of them little sweater vests.
-They're nice. -I'll remind you.
Crossing the border is forbidden.
There was a time when it wasn't.
The rule is there to keep the fairies safe.
That will never change.
But I...
If a Warm Fairy comes here,
you will send them back.
Of course.
Thank you.
Well, you heard the Lord Milori.
He said you must go back home.
Of course, he didn't say when.
(BOTH GASP)
Now, listen, you two,
it gets colder in the dark,
so it's best to get Tinker Bell
home before the first moonlight.
Thank you, Dewey.
Dewey?
That's his real name.
It's what my friends call me.
Thank you.
Dewey.
Dewey.
So, um, I'm a Frost Fairy. I frost things.
-Oh. I'm a Tinker. I... -Tinker things?
Yep. I even made this coat.
-Oh, I like it. -Thanks.
PERIWINKLE: You're welcome.
(CHUCKLES) Sisters.
It's amazing. The dust travels
all the way from the Pixie Dust Tree.
Kind of like you did.
...Terence and I
barely escaped the pirate ship!
-Is he your boyfriend? -Uh...
So Lizzy loves fairies?
Yeah. She even build a fairy house.
That's how I met her.
You see, me and Vidia...
(SCREAMS)
(BOTH LAUGH)
You collect lost things, too?
I call them found things.
WOMAN: ♪ I never knew
I lost you till I found you
♪ And you'd never guess
how close you are to me
♪ Now I want to
throw my arms around you
♪ Tell a thousand tales
that will astound you
♪ Everything about you
tells me this was meant to be
♪ Don't you see?
I'm on your side
♪ Let's take this ride
♪ And together we're facing the world
♪ Doing things nobody's done before
♪ And the great divide
♪ Doesn't seem so wide
♪ Anymore ♪
This is the Frost Forest.
TINKER BELL: Wow.
That's Gliss.
Come on, Spike. Practice.
Okay, okay. Practicing.
And that's Spike. She's a bit...
Whoa!
(LAUGHING)
-Hi. -Sisters?
Well, I think it's fantastic!
Wow, you two look exactly alike!
I mean, except for your clothes
and your hair and Peri's a bit more pale.
But your noses are very similar.
Forget their noses.
She's a Warm Fairy. In Winter!
(GASPS) You're right.
We got to show her around!
Oh, oh, oh!
Let's take her ice sliding!
Come on, Spike!
You are going to love this!
It sounds fun.
Yeah. Great idea.
Push the Warm Fairy down a hill of ice.
Okay, well, wait for me, you guys.
♪ And if you'll be there
beside me when I falter
♪ Then whatever comes I know
we'll take it all in stride
Ready, set, slide!
♪ I'm on your side
♪ I'm on your side
♪ Let's take this ride
♪ And together we're facing the world
♪ Doing things nobody's done before
♪ And the great divide
♪ Doesn't seem so wide
♪ Anymore ♪
(BOTH LAUGHING)
(BOTH EXCLAIM)
ANNA: Elsa!
Elsa!
Elsa, it's me, Anna,
your sister who didn't mean
to make you freeze the summer.
I'm sorry. (SHIVERING) It's all my fault.
Of course, none of it
would have happened
if she had just told me her secret.
(CHUCKLES) She's a stinker.
(GASPS) Whoa!
-(SPUTTERS) -(HORSE NEIGHING)
Oh, no. No, no, no! Come back!
No, no, no!
(SHIVERING) Okay.
(GRUNTING)
(GROANS)
DOMINIC: Look at that.
"Muppets sell out in Berlin." Five stars!
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
Kermit the Frog is liking this news.
Choo-choo, yeah!
(CHUCKLES) Ooh, tunnel.
(GRUNTS)
Ooh!
(MUFFLED YELLING)
CONSTANTINE: (GROANS)
It's not there.
You were wrong!
Not so fast.
Oldest trick in the book.
-(SIZZLES) -Mmm.
Write it in lemon juice,
then simply apply heat
to reveal Colonel Blood's map.
Mmm...
Of course, today,
the Crown Jewels lie behind
the most sophisticated
security system on the planet.
And this map, along with
Blood's key and locket,
is the only way to get close to them.
Good work, Number Two.
What does it say about location
of Blood's key?
Right.
Something, something.
"Finest wooden teeth."
That is not helpful.
Wait.
There's the name of a city here.
Madrid.
(MAN SHOUTING IN RUSSIAN)
KERMIT: You've got the wrong frog!
(PRISONERS CLAMORING)
(MUFFLED WHIMPERING)
Hey, hey, hey!
Ah! Ow.
(MUFFLED TALKING)
(GASPING)
It's Constantine.
-What? -He's back.
What are you doing?
I'm not Constantine. My name is Kermit.
Constantine, always with the jokes!
(ALL LAUGHING)
Good old Constantine.
Always trying to pull a fast one.
(LAUGHING)
Old friend.
Since you are back,
I guess you are
in charge of prison again.
Here, take prison crown.
We have to readjust it again.
Sergei, you get on that.
Take, take.
(SIGHS)
Oh, thank you.
Uh... (CLEARS THROAT)
Wait a minute.
I've known Constantine for years.
And he has never...
Ever...
Said, "Thank you."
Because I am not Constantine.
(WHIMPERS)
-How dare you? -MISS POOGY: He's not Constantine!
Let's throw him
in the recycling compacter!
Yeah!
MISS POOGY: Throw him
in the compacter!
But I'm already green!
MISS POOGY: Squash that frog!
NADYA: Put the frog down.
Or I will deploy.
(KERMIT YELPS)
(WHIMPERING)
Where am I?
The Gulag.
A gulag?
Gulag. The Big House.
Casa Grande!
ALL: The Big House!
-Hit it, boys. -(ALL VOCALIZING)
♪ This is Russia's premier state-funded hotel
♪ We're very proud of our eclectic clientele
♪ Excellence in service since 1932
♪ Don't believe what you read in the online reviews
♪ It's the Big House The perfect getaway
♪ Welcome into the Big House
♪ You'll never get away
♪ It's no Hilton or no Hyatt But you will have a riot
♪ So please enjoy your stay
♪ Bah-dah-dah
♪ Here's the dining room The menu is minimal
♪ What the cook does to the food is criminal
♪ Pull up a seat, frog
♪ Grab yourself a stool
♪ May I recommend
♪ You try our famous gruel?
♪ In the Big House
♪ You'll never be alone
♪ Life ain't bad in the Big House
-♪ No, froggy, no -(CHUCKLING)
♪ Check out after 10
♪ Or 11 years
♪ Make yourself at home
♪ Accommodation here is far superior
♪ Than anything else
♪ You will find in Siberia
♪ Let me know if there's anything you need
♪ Everything is free
♪ Money back, guaranteed
MAXIMUM SECURITY PRISONER:
♪ In the Big House
♪ You will not survive
♪ When you arrive in the Big House
♪ Run for your life
(NADYA MIMICKING TRUMPET)
MUPPET PRISONER: ♪ Two, three, four
♪ It's the Big House The perfect getaway
♪ Welcome into the Big House
♪ You'll never get away
♪ For your sorority
♪ I'll keep the only key
♪ Now, please enjoy your stay ♪
(YELLS)
Listen, I'm telling you,
you've got the wrong frog!
If you are not Constantine,
why do you have that mole?
It's not real. Someone glued it to my lip.
As far as authorities are concerned,
you are Constantine.
Glue or no glue.
-(SIGHS) -Make yourself comfortable.
You're going to be here a while.
I wouldn't be so sure.
My friends will be here soon!
NADYA: Now, lights out!
(CLATTERING)
Turn them back on! I can't see anything.
(GROANS)
You have to wait until I'm, like,
out of the hallway.
It's figure of speech.
-(WHIMPERS) -(MAN SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)
(PANTING)
Snow. It had to be snow.
She couldn't have had tropical magic
that covered the fjords
in white sand and warm...
Fire! (CHUCKLES)
(SHRIEKING)
(GRUNTS)
(SHIVERING)
Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold.
(CONTINUES SHIVERING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTS)
(READING)
Ooh. "And sauna"!
-(GASPS) -(WIND HOWLING)
(SHIVERS)
-Yoo-hoo. -Hmm?
Big summer blowout.
Half off swimming suits, clogs,
and a sun balm of my
own invention, yah?
Oh. Great.
For now, um, how about boots?
Winter boots and dresses?
That would be in our winter department.
Oh. Um...
I was just wondering.
Has another young woman...
The queen perhaps, I don't know,
passed through here?
The only one crazy enough
to be out in this storm
-is you, dear. -(DOOR OPENS)
(PANTING)
You and this fellow.
Yoo-hoo.
Big summer blowout.
(ANNA HUMMING NONCHALANTLY)
KRISTOFF: Carrots.
Huh?
Behind you.
Oh! Right. Excuse me.
Oh. A real howler in July, yes?
Wherever could it be coming from?
KRISTOFF: The North Mountain.
North Mountain?
That will be 40.
Forty? No, 10.
Oh, dear, that's no good.
See, this is from our winter stock,
where supply and demand
have a big problem.
You want to talk about
a supply and demand problem?
I sell ice for a living.
Ooh. That's a rough business
to be in right now.
(CHUCKLES) I mean, that is really...
(CLEARS THROAT) That's unfortunate.
Still 40.
But I will throw in
a visit to Oaken's sauna.
Yoo-hoo. Hi, family.
ALL: Yoo-hoo!
Ten is all I got. Help me out.
Okay. Ten will get you this and no more.
Okay, just tell me one thing.
What was happening
on the North Mountain?
Did it seem magical?
(EXHALES) Yes!
Now, back up while I deal
with this crook, here.
(GULPS)
What did you call me?
KRISTOFF: Okay, okay. I'm out.
Whoa! (GRUNTS)
Bye-bye.
(SPUTTERS)
No, Sven, I didn't get your carrots.
(GROANS)
But I did find us a place to sleep.
-And it's free. -(SNORTS)
I'm sorry about this violence.
I will add a quart of lutefisk,
so we have good feelings.
Just the outfit and the boots, yah?
Uh...
(TUNE BEING PICKED ON LUTE)
♪ Reindeers are better than people
♪ Sven, don't you think that's true?
♪ "Yeah, people will beat you And curse you and cheat you"
♪ "Every one of them's bad, except you"
Aw. Thanks, buddy.
♪ But people smell better than reindeers
♪ Sven, don't you think I'm right?
♪ "That's once again true For all, except you"
♪ You got me Let's call it a night
♪ "Good night"
♪ Don't let the frostbite
♪ Bite ♪
-Nice duet. -(GASPS)
(SIGHS) It's just you.
What do you want?
I want you to take me up
the North Mountain.
I don't take people places.
Let me rephrase that.
(GROANS) Hey.
Take me up the North Mountain.
-Please. -(SNIFFING)
Look, I know how to stop this winter.
(SIGHS)
We leave at dawn.
And you forgot the carrots for Sven.
-(GRUNTS) -Oops, sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't...
(CLEARS THROAT)
We leave now. Right now.
Whew!
-(URGING SVEN) -(ANNA SHRIEKS)
(ANNA CHUCKLES BREATHLESSLY)
Hang on! We like to go fast.
-I like fast. -Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa...
Get your feet down. This is fresh lacquer.
Seriously, were you raised in a barn?
-(SPITS) -Ugh!
-No, I was raised in a castle. -Hmm.
KRISTOFF: So, uh, tell me,
what made the queen go all ice-crazy?
Oh. Well...
It was all my fault.
I got engaged, but then she freaked out,
because I'd only just met him,
you know, that day.
And she said I wouldn't
bless the marriage, and...
Wait. You got engaged
to someone you just met that day?
Yeah. Anyway, I got mad,
and so she got mad,
and then she tried to walk away,
and I grabbed her glove...
Hang on!
You mean to tell me you got engaged
to someone you just met that day?
Yes. Pay attention.
But the thing is, she wore
the gloves all the time,
so I just thought, maybe
she has a thing about dirt.
Didn't your parents ever
warn you about strangers?
Yes, they did.
But Hans is not a stranger.
Oh, yeah? What's his last name?
(SCOFFS) "Of the Southern Isles."
-What's his favorite food? -Sandwiches.
-Best friend's name? -Probably John.
-Eye color? -Dreamy.
-Foot size? -Foot size doesn't matter.
Have you had a meal with him yet?
What if you hate the way he eats?
What if you hate the
way he picks his nose?
Picks his nose?
And eats it.
Excuse me, sir. He is a prince.
-All men do it. -Ew.
Look, it doesn't matter. It's true love.
It doesn't sound like true love. (SCOFFS)
Are you some sort of love expert?
No. But, uh, I have friends who are.
You have friends
who are love experts? I'm not buying it.
-Stop talking. -No, no, no. No, no.
-I'd like to meet these... -No, I mean it.
(GRUNTS)
(SHUSHES)
(GRUNTS)
(LOW GROWLING)
Sven, go.
Go!
-What are they? -Wolves.
Wolves?
-What do we do? -I got this
You just...
Don't fall off, and don't get eaten.
But I want to help!
-No. -Why not?
Because I don't trust your judgment.
Excuse me?
Who marries a man she just met?
It's true love!
-Whoa! -(GRUNTS)
Whoa. Whoa!
Christopher!
It's "Kristoff"!
Ow! (YELPS)
(KRISTOFF GRUNTING)
Duck!
(SCREAMS)
(SNARLING)
You almost set me on fire!
But I didn't.
-(BOTH GRUNTING) -(SVEN GROANS)
(BOTH GASP)
Get ready to jump, Sven!
You don't tell him what to do.
-Hey! -I do!
Jump, Sven!
(GRUNTS)
(ANNA EXCLAIMS)
(KRISTOFF YELLING)
-(GROWLING) -(BARKING)
Phew!
(WHIMPERS)
But I just paid it off.
Uh-oh. No. No.
No!
Ah! No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
ANNA: Grab on!
Pull, Sven. Pull!
(KRISTOFF GRUNTING)
(BOTH PANTING)
-(SLED THUDS) -Whoa.
(KRISTOFF GROANS)
I'll replace your sled,
and everything in it.
And I understand if you don't
want to help me anymore.
-(GRUNTING) -(SIGHS)
Of course I don't want to help
them anymore. In fact,
this whole thing has ruined me
for helping anyone ever again.
ANNA: It's this way?
"She'll die on her own."
-I can live with that. -ANNA: Here we go.
"But you won't get
your new sled if she's dead."
ANNA: I think, actually, it's up.
Sometimes, I really don't like you.
-(PANTING) -Hold up! We're coming.
You are?
I mean, sure. I'll let you tag along.
(CHUCKLES)
(GROANS)
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
DOMINIC: Okay.
It seems that Blood's key
is hidden in a marble bust
of his accomplice,
Godfrey the Unknown,
which is kept in the Statue Room
at the Prado Museum.
CONSTANTINE: Perfect.
We break in, steal the bust,
destroy it and grab key.
Yeah, it's not that simple.
You see, no one knows
what Godfrey the Unknown looked like.
(LAUGHS) Of course not.
He was second in command,
so no one cared.
And there's 250 statues in that room.
That may be problem.
Let me think, Number Two.
(BREATHES DEEPLY) Hmm...
Excusez-moi, Kermie.
Do you have a moment?
Kermit.
I just wanted to say
that I accept your apology
and I'm ready to
put our little disagreement
or whatever it was, behind us.
And, perhaps, I was a little too
eager about our wedding.
Pig, I have question.
Am I wearing sign
that says "Bother Me"?
-(GASPING) -(BARKING)
-(MISS PIGGY SOBBING) -What was that? What was that?
Uh... I was in the middle
of evilly plotting.
I do not like to be interrupted
while evilly plotting.
If we're to get away with this,
you've got to keep up appearances.
I am keeping up appearances.
If you want the Crown Jewels,
stick to the plan.
Do whatever the pig wants.
Keep her happy.
Whatever she asks of you.
Stupid frog!
Stupid train!
Mmm-hmm.
I don't want to talk to you, Kermit.
I said, I want you out!
I don't think you know what you want.
-Yeah, l do. I just told you, I... -Shh.
You're my lady
and I'm your man, baby.
And that's why, if you stick with me,
I can give you what you want. Hmm?
♪ Baby, stop right there
♪ Let me clear the air
♪ Baby, look into these eyes Let me apologize
♪ I know what you're thinking of
♪ You're thinking, "Where's the love?"
♪ Babe, the love ain't gone It's here where it belongs
♪ I know what you're waiting for
♪ Well, you don't need to wait no more
♪ I can give you anything you want
♪ Give you anything you need
♪ I'll make your dreams come true
♪ Give you anything you want
♪ Fulfill your fantasies
♪ I'll make your dreams come true
♪ You want a unicorn I'll give it to you
♪ You want a puppy dog I'll give it to you
♪ You want an ice cream cone I'll give it to you
♪ You want a mortgage loan I'll give it to you
♪ You want a satin pillow I'll give it to you
♪ You want an armadillo I'll give it to you
♪ You want a diamond ring I'll give it to you
♪ You want a thingy-thing I'll give it to you
♪ I know what you're waiting for
♪ Well, you don't need to wait no more
♪ I can give you anything you want
♪ Give you anything you need
♪ I'll make your dreams come true
♪ Give you anything you want
♪ Fulfill your fantasies
♪ I'll make your dreams come true
♪ Ooh-ooh! Whoa
-♪ I'm singing -♪ Cockatoo
-♪ Yeah -♪ Kangaroo
♪ Ooh
♪ In Malibu
♪ I'll give it to you
♪ I'll make your dreams come true
-♪ Cockatoo -♪ Cockatoo
-♪ Kangaroo -♪ Kangaroo
♪ In Malibu
♪ I'll make your dreams come true ♪
Oh, Kermie.
You are what I've always wanted.
-Uh, excuse us. -Hmm?
But we are all wondering,
what's the set list for tomorrow, chief?
I don't care. Do whatever you want.
MISS PIGGY: What?
FLOYD: Is he serious?
Uh, Kermit, could I do
indoor running of the bulls?
Sure, Zongo. Who cares?
Wow! Thank you, Kermit!
Kermie, if he can do his thing,
why can't I sing my five songs?
Well...
You can. Who cares?
We don't have time for all this stuff.
We're up to a three-hour show, Kermit.
You are forgetting one thing,
small man with glasses.
I can give you what you want.
All right!
Okay. Indoor running the bulls.
Won't the show be terrible? Uh... Guys?
(SIGHS) I'm so confused.
(GROANING)
Ah!
Where are you guys?
Looks like I'm gonna have
to break out of here myself.
(SIGHS)
It's The Muppet Show,
with our very special guest star,
Lynn Redgrave.
Yay!
(IMITATING) Yes!
Oh. Hi-ho! Kermit the Frog, here.
Hi-lo.
Kermit the Frog here.
♪ The lovers, the dreamers and me
♪ The lovers, the dreamers and cheese ♪
Nailed it.
(GRUNTS)
It's El Muppet Show,
with our very special guest,
Salma Hayek.
Hey!
(PLAYING SPANISH GUITAR RIFF)
(SINGING THEME IN SPANISH)
-Would you look at that? -No.
Good idea.
(SINGING IN SPANISH)
(CHEERING)
(LAUGHS)
Yes! Hello and welcome
to El Muppet Show.
Please welcome our opening act,
the Great Gonzo
and the indoor running of the bulls!
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDS)
Gonzo? Gonzo, I don't want to do this.
What? This is gonna be great.
Are you sure about this?
Nope. Come on. Let's go.
-Where have you been? -On stage.
-Why did the... -(BULLS BELLOWING)
(GONZO SCREAMING)
(BOTH SCREAMING)
The bulls are out of control!
Who could have foreseen this?
Me. I did.
Here they come again!
Okay. Sorry about that, folks,
but now put your hands together
for Miss Piggy. Olé!
(VOCALIZING)
(SINGING IN SPANISH)
♪ Don't you worry about my boyfriend
♪ The boy whose name is Kermitino
(BOTH GROANING)
I don't believe it.
They've managed the impossible.
What an achievement!
Bravo! Bravo!
What? You mean you actually
like this show now?
No! They've made the show even worse!
(BOTH LAUGHING)
-Bravo! Bravo! -Amazing!
-(STATUES SMASHING) -DOMINIC: Where is it?
CONSTANTINE:
It's got to be here somewhere.
Keep smashing, Number Two.
DOMINIC: What do you think I'm doing?
I'm smashing.
CONSTANTINE: Where is that key?
DOMINIC: The last one.
It better be in here.
This one says,
"A Man Forgotten by History."
And he looks annoyed.
He looks a little bit like you,
Number Two.
(GRUNTS)
DOMINIC: Colonel Blood's key.
CONSTANTINE: Nice of him to label it.
-So, where is the locket? -There's more.
(DOMINIC READING)
Of course. That's where his locket is.
In the vaults of the Irish National Bank.
Then I know where Muppet tour
must stop next. Dublin.
(PLAYING ROCK MUSIC)
Drum solo!
(SIGHS)
(SNORING)
(SONG ENDS)
Huh!
(ALL CHEERING)
A standing ovation?
CONSTANTINE: I am Kermit.
I hope you enjoyed my show.
I love you, Madrid!
Wow, what an audience!
Great show, Kermit!
They loved me, Kermie! They loved me!
WALTER: Guys?
I'm not sure that was such a great show.
Like, what are you talking about?
That jam was, like, totally epic.
Exactly.
And I'm glad to say the Spanish reviewers
disagree with you as well, Walter.
They loved us.
Five out of five jamón serranos.
Those reviews really came out fast.
And Citizen Kane only got
four jamón serranos.
DOMINIC: And more good news.
Pack up, everyone.
I've booked our next gig. In Dublin.
Oh, great! Now we all
have time to rehearse.
Rehearse? Let's celebrate.
Yeah!
CONSTANTINE: Yes!
You deserve it, comrades!
Go do whatever you want.
Ooh!
(BOTH PANTING)
(ANNA GASPS)
Arendelle.
-It's completely frozen. -(SIGHS)
But it will be fine. Elsa will thaw it.
Will she?
Yeah. Now, come on.
This way to the North Mountain?
(CHUCKLES)
More like this way.
(GASPS)
SID: ♪ Some day, when you're gonna sing
♪ When you make us sing
-Shut up, Sid. -Okay.
♪ Stop, hey-hey, what's that sound?
♪ All the mammoths are in the ground
Stop singing, Sid!
♪ If your species will continue, clap your hands
♪ If your species...
Sid, I'm gonna fall on you again,
and this time I will kill you.
Okay. Someone doesn't like the classics.
What if they're right?
What if I am a last mammoth?
But, Manny, look at the bright side.
You have us!
Not your most persuasive argument, Sid.
-(DISTANT SOUND) -(MAMMOTHS TRUMPETING)
-Mammoths? -I knew he couldn't be the last one!
-(SID GRUNTS) -I felt it in my trunk!
(BLUBBERING) Whoa! Whoa!
-(MAMMOTHS TRUMPETING) -Whoa!
Extinct! Come on!
He's coming around the corner,
and he's up by a couple of fifths.
He's ahead by tusks!
Oh, he's beating Diego!
Diego's gonna go to the corner!
-MANNY: Whoa! -(SID SCREAMS)
Ow! Ow! Ooh! (GROANS)
(GAS BLOWING)
Sorry. My stomach hates me.
(GROANS)
Oh. Phew!
Eew! Don't that put the
"stink" in "extinction.
Whoo! Sheesh! Eww! Nasty!
SID: Manny?
I, uh… I need to be alone for a while.
You go on ahead. I'll catch up.
One truly is the loneliest number.
-Ow! -Ow! Hey!
-(BOTH LAUGHING) -Ooh! These work great!
-Ow! -Cool.
-(ROARS) -(BOTH SCREAM)
Missed me! Missed me!
Now you gotta kiss me!
I'll get them.
Which end is up?
I'd hide that face too.
-Hey, ugly. -Ow! I gotta sit on that!
Whoo-hoo! Ay!
-You! -Got me!
Gotcha!
Yeah! Uh-oh.
-Boo. -(BOTH SCREAM)
Okay, I'm going in! (SCREAMS)
-Sid! -What?
-Ow! Ow! -Nice miss!
-Cover your side. -Ooh! I felt some breeze on that one.
Smile!
Whoo-hoo!
-(BLOWS RASPBERRY) -Out of my way!
-Sid! -Hello!
-Over here! -(BOTH GRUNT)
-Surrender? -BOTH: Never!
Cool!
-CRASH: Smoke them! -(GASPS)
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Anyone asks, there were 50 of them…
and, uh, they were rattlesnakes.
(LAUGHS) Here, kitty, kitty.
Big mistake, you miscreants.
-Miscreants? -(BOTH LAUGHING)
Uh, Diego, they're possums.
(CLUCKING)
-(ROARS) -Retreat!
(ROARS)
I guess it's just you and me now.
-(GASPS) -(SCREAMS)
(BOTH SHRIEK)
Ooh. (SPITS) Hmm.
I knew it!
-I knew I wasn't the only one! -Me too!
Everyone falls out of the tree every
now and then. They just don't admit it.
Wait. What?
Some of us have a tough time
holding on to branches.
It's not like we're bats or something.
We don't have wings to keep us up.
And you were in the tree because...
Oh, I was just looking for my brothers.
They are always getting into trouble.
Brothers? You mean there's more?
Sure! Whoa!
There's lots of us.
-Where? -Uh, everywhere?
Under rocks, in holes in the ground.
Usually we come out at night
so birds don't carry us off.
-Huh? -Help! Help! Help!
(ROARS)
-EDDIE: (PANTING) Help! -(GASPS)
Well, shave me down
and call me a mole rat!
You found another mammoth!
Where?
Wait a minute.
I thought mammoths were extinct.
-What are you looking at me for? -I don't know.
Maybe because you're a mammoth?
Me? Don't be ridiculous.
I'm not a mammoth. I'm a possum.
Right. Good one. I'm a newt.
This is my friend, the badger,
and my other friend, the platypus.
Why do I gotta be the platypus?
Make him the platypus.
This guy giving you trouble, sis?
-ALL: "Sis"? -That's right.
These are my brothers...
Possum, possum, possum.
I don't think her tree goes
all the way to the top branch.
Manny, think of extinction's
a bad time to be picky.
Hey, she should come with us.
-Are you insane? No way. -Okay.
Manny wants me to ask you
if you'd like to escape the flood with us.
-MANNY: What? -I'd rather be roadkill.
-That can be arranged. -(LAUGHS) Funny!
Let me have a little word
with my brothers.
(GROWLING)
Ellie, are you crazy?
We're not going with them!
Look, we'll never make it in time
if we only travel at night.
These guys can protect
us out in the open.
What do you say?
-Ow! -Why did you invite them?
Because you might be the only
two mammoths left on Earth.
-He has a point. -I'm sorry.
When did I join this dating service?
My brothers and I would
be delighted to come with you.
-(GROANS) -If you treat us nicely.
-(GROWLS) -See that?
That's the total opposite of nice.
Maybe we'll have ourselves a little
snack before we hit the road.
You want a piece of us? Let's go.
Banzai!
-I got him! Ow! -Back! Back!
-Yah! Yah! -Ow!
You know the best part?
We're carrying diseases.
(ICE RUMBLING)
(SPITS)
MANNY: Okay.
Thanks to Sid,
we're now traveling together...
and, like it or not...
we're gonna be one big, happy family.
I'll be the daddy,
Ellie will be the mommy...
and Diego will be the uncle...
who eats the kids
who get on my nerves.
Now, let's move it before the
ground falls out from under our feet!
I thought fat guys
were supposed to be jolly.
I'm not fat. It's this fur.
It makes me look big.
-It's poofy. -(CHUCKLING) Oh. Okay.
He's fat.
(ICE TINKLING)
(GRUNTING EXCITEDLY)
I never knew winter
could be so beautiful.
OLAF: Yeah.
It really is beautiful, isn't it?
But it's so white.
You know, how about a little color?
I'm thinking maybe some
crimson, chartreuse.
How about yellow?
No, not yellow. Yellow and snow?
(SHUDDERS) No go.
(CHUCKLES)
(BOTH GASP)
-Am I right? -(SHRIEKS)
-Hi. -You're creepy.
-OLAF: Whoa! -I don't want it.
-Back at you. -OLAF: Please don't drop me.
-No. -Come on, it's just a head.
OLAF: All right. We got off to a bad start.
Ew, ew, ew, the body!
(GROANS)
Wait, what am I looking at right now?
Why are you hanging off
the earth like a bat?
All right, wait one second.
Oh. Uh...
Oh!
-Thank you. -You're welcome.
Now, I'm perfect.
(CHUCKLES)
Well, almost.
It was like my whole life
got turned upside down.
(GRUNTS)
Oh! Too hard. I'm sorry!
-Head rush! -I was just... Are you okay?
Are you kidding me? I am wonderful!
I've always wanted a nose.
(IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) So cute.
It's like a little baby unicorn.
(IN NORMAL VOICE) But... Hey! Whoa!
-(GASPS) -Oh.
I love it even more.
(EXHALES)
All right, let's start this thing over.
Hi, everyone.
I'm Olaf.
And I like warm hugs.
Olaf?
That's right. Olaf.
And you are?
Oh. Um...
I'm Anna.
And who's the funky-looking
donkey over there?
-That's Sven. -Uh-huh.
And who's the reindeer?
Sven.
Oh, the... Oh. Okay.
That makes things easier for me.
(SQUEALS) Aw, look at him
trying to kiss my nose.
-I like you, too. -Olaf.
-Did Elsa build you? -Yeah. Why?
Do you know where she are?
-Fascinating. -Yeah. Why?
Do you think you could
show us the way?
Yeah. Why?
How does this work? Ow!
Stop it, Sven. I'm trying to focus, here.
-Yeah. Why? -I'll tell you why.
We need Elsa to bring back summer.
-Summer? -Mmm-hmm.
Oh. I don't know why,
but I've always loved
the idea of summer.
And sun, and all things hot.
Really?
I'm guessing you don't have
much experience with heat.
Nope.
But sometimes I like to close my eyes,
and imagine what it would be
like when summer does come.
(SIGHING CONTENTEDLY)
♪ Bees will buzz Kids will blow dandelion fuzz
♪ And I'll be doing Whatever snow does in summer
♪ A drink in my hand
♪ My snow up against the burning sand
♪ Probably getting gorgeously tanned
♪ In summer
♪ I'll finally see a summer breeze
♪ Blow away a Winter storm
♪ And find out what happens to solid water
♪ When it gets warm
♪ And I can't wait to see
♪ What my buddies all think of me
♪ Just imagine how much cooler I'll be
♪ In summer!
(VOCALIZING)
♪ The hot and the cold are both so intense
♪ Put them together It just makes sense
(SCATTING)
♪ Winter's a good time To stay in and cuddle
♪ But put me in summer and I'll be a...
♪ Happy snowman!
♪ When life gets rough
♪ I like to hold on to my dream
♪ Relaxing in the summer sun Just letting off steam
♪ Oh, the sky
♪ Will be blue
♪ And you guys will be there, too
♪ When I finally do
♪ What frozen things do In summer!
-I'm gonna tell him. -Don't you dare.
♪ In summer! ♪
So, come on! Elsa's this way.
Let's go bring back summer!
-I'm coming! -(OLAF LAUGHING)
Somebody's gotta tell him.
(GRUNTING)
(CHITTERS)
(INHALES)
(GASPING)
(GRUNTS)
-(SCREAMS) -(WATER SPLASHES)
Folks! Escaping the flood
is the perfect time
to shed those unsightly pounds
with Fast Tony's Disaster Diet!
You, ma'am! You look
like a big, fat hairy beast!
-Ooh! -How'd you like to lose a ton or two, eh?
Would I ever!
Don't listen to him, Vera!
You're already thin as a twig.
Oh-ho! I also have the perfect cure
for your eyesight, my blind friend.
Yeow!
(GRUNTING)
(WHISTLES)
(GASPS)
Huh?
(GASPS)
Oh, we'll never make it at this pace.
Ellie, it's okay!
You can lose the camouflage!
-You're safe! -Okay! Safe? Please.
Crash, Eddie, you two scope it out.
What you got?
Perimeter looks to be all clear, Captain.
-Roger that. One-niner, over. -Roger. Over, victor… Ow!
-(LAUGHING) -(GRUNTING)
-ELLIE: Guys! -All clear!
Yahoo!
-Whoa! -(GRUNTS)
-Hawk! -(GASPS)
-(HAWK SHRIEKING) -(PANTING)
(ELLIE CRASHING LOUD)
-What are you doing? -Playing dead.
Manny, why don't you do that?
Because I'm a mammoth!
But you'd do it for treats, right?
Is he gone?
(SHRIEKS)
You're safe. Get up.
Whoo! Oh, man.
If you weren't here,
that hawk would've swooped
down and snatched me up for dinner.
That's how cousin Wilton went.
(WHISTLES)
Boy, I really feel for you. I do.
I can't even imagine what it'd be
like to be the last one of your species.
-I'm not the last one. -Oh, you brave, brave soul.
That's right. Don't give up hope.
(SIGHS) Ellie?
Look at our footprints.
They're the same shape.
Well. How do I know those
aren't your footprints?
Well, then...
look at our shadows.
We match.
You're right. They're the same!
You must be part possum!
You wish.
Diego, there are whole
continents moving faster than you.
Let's go!
We gotta catch up with the others.
(POSSUMS LAUGHING)
-(LAUGHING) -Yeah!
Hey, knock it off.
Whoa!
Oh, cry me a river,
blubber- toothed tiger.
Have some fun.
Can't you see the ice is thin enough
without you two wearing to down?
Ah, Diego, come on.
The ice may be thin,
but it's strong enough
to hold a 10-ton mammoth...
and a 9-ton possum.
Hmm.
-(GASPS) -(BOTH WHOOPING)
(BLUBBERS)
(SCREAMING)
Mammal overboard!
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Ho!
-(GROWLS) -(SCREAMS)
EDDIE: Ellie, get up!
If you play dead, you'll be dead!
Look at me!
(SCREAMS)
-Diego? -(PANTING)
Diego!
(YELLS)
Ah! Come on, Diego. Come on! Oh!
This might sting a little.
(ROARING)
(SID SCREAMING)
(PANTING)
(GROWLING)
(GASPS)
(GRUNTS)
What in the animal kingdom was that?
I don't know,
but from now on, land safe.
Water? Not safe.
That was the bravest thing
I've ever seen.
-It was nothing really. I, uh... -Oh, it's not a compliment.
To a possum, bravery is just dumb.
-Yeah, we're spineless. -Lily-liveried.
Maybe mammoths are going extinct...
because they put themselves
in danger too often.
Maybe you should run away more.
Good point. Thanks for the advice.
Happy to help.
Do you believe her?
(MIMICKING ELLIE)
"Bravery's just dumb.
Maybe you should run away more."
He's infuriating and
stubborn and narrow-minded.
-Ooh, you like her! -I do not!
Oh, don't worry.
Your secret's safe with me.
-Oh, and so is yours. -What secret?
You know,
the one where you can't swim.
That's ridiculous.
Fine, but we're living
in a melting world, buddy.
You're gonna have to face
your fear sooner... or... later.
(GUARD WHIMPERS)
Looks like we are busted.
(GRUMBLING) Exactly what
are we doing today?
I am doing my job.
All we need to do is look at the map
with the blinky lights. And wait.
This is how it is done here in Europe.
In America, we use 3-D
satellite LED displays.
Not cardboard with Christmas
lights stuck through it.
A blinky light! She is blinking! Let's go.
(BEEPING)
What is this? A toy?
This is my car, Le Maximum.
It is illegal now in most of the
EU for its massive size.
It's so needlessly spacious, I feel guilty.
(JEAN PIERRE YELLS IN FRENCH)
SAM THE EAGLE: I hate Europe.
JEAN PIERRE: Madrid, here we come!
(HORN BEEPING)
Get out of the way.
SAM THE EAGLE: Stay on the road!
JEAN PIERRE: Interpol!
Excusez-moi.
MAN: Watch out, everyone!
JEAN PIERRE: 37 hours. Not bad.
The Lemur. I knew it.
This doesn't make any sense.
Why break in,
smash some priceless busts
and then not steal anything?
There must be
something bigger going on.
-But what? -(CLOCK BELL TOLLING)
Ah, I've got it!
Oh, sorry. 2:00 PM. My day is over.
Wait. Those weirdos, the Muppets,
were performing next to the
crime scene in Berlin.
And here they are,
performing right next to the
crime scene in Madrid!
You know what that means.
-Yes, they love museums! -No!
They're suspects!
Okay. Overtime.
We must find these Muppets
before they flee the country.
To the train station!
Hey, Larry, want a bite of my bocadillos?
(WOMAN YELPS)
-What the... -Ah!
Are you all Les Muppets?
Wow, those are big badges!
-Thank you. -Merci...
Come, come. You must come with us
to answer some questions.
♪ Kermit, let's begin Describe the day you played Berlin
♪ We rehearsed, and then we walked about
♪ We ate bratwurst and sauerkraut
♪ That night at 10:03
♪ Were you inside the portrait gallery?
♪ My alibi is watertight
♪ The audience saw me sing all night
♪ Monsieur, we know you did the crime
♪ I was on stage that whole time
♪ Ask who sang Rainbow Connection
♪ Thank you, Kermit, no more questions
Allô. I think it's time for
good cop/romantic cop.
♪ Miss Piggy, you could end up locked inside
♪ And now's your chance to save your hide
♪ Oh, gentlemen, I did not know
♪ It's a crime to steal the show
♪ Tell us how the art was taken
♪ If you want to save your bacon
♪ I haven't seen your missing art
♪ All I've stolen is audience hearts
♪ We'll catch the swine
♪ That did this job
♪ Give up the pig puns, creep!
♪ Go jump in a lake, that's my suggestion
♪ Thank you, Piggy, no more questions
I think she likes me. Huh?
I don't think your puns are
helping the investigation.
-♪ You know, I think they did it -♪ No, they didn't
♪ Yes, they did and we can pin it
♪ If they did how did they do it?
♪ If they didn't how did they didn't?
♪ If they didn't then it's easy 'cause they simply didn't do it
♪ If they did it, then I knew it but we've nothing that can prove it
-(CLEARS THROAT) Oh. Excuse me. -(GROANS)
♪ Let's go from the start
♪ What do you know about the stolen art?
♪ I didn't know there was a plan
♪ Your accusation's far out, man
♪ The chances of us committing a crime are less than .009
(SPEAKING MOCK SWEDISH)
-(QUACKING) -(YELLING)
(LAUGHS)
♪ Uh, I can do an Elvis impression
♪ Thank you, Muppets No more questions
-♪ They didn't -♪ No, they didn't
♪ There's no way they did the crime
-♪ They couldn't, they're too stupid -♪ Not criminal masterminds
♪ We do not know who did it But we know who didn't do it
♪ So we know who didn't do it
♪ Yes, we know who didn't do it
♪ They're incapable of being culpable! ♪
Hi!
SAM THE EAGLE: Come on.
Let's go over the files again.
(CHITTERS AND GRUNTS)
(GRUNTING)
(SQUEALS)
(GASPS)
-(SCREAMING) -(JAWS CLACKING)
(BLUBBERING)
(GASPS)
(FEROCIOUS YELLING)
Yeoh!
(YELLS) Hmm!
(WHIMPERS)
(WHINES)
(GUARDS SPEAKING RUSSIAN)
(SCREAMS)
Stop digging escape tunnel, frog.
How did you know?
It's the first escape everyone tries.
-(SCREAMS) -That's the second escape people try.
(GRUNTING)
(TOILET FLUSHES)
Oh, boy.
Third way!
(SCREAMS)
Give up, frog.
I have Netflix account
with search keywords "prison escape."
I have seen every prison
movie ever made.
Even the ones in space.
(SIGHS)
Yeah, well... (GASPS)
Hey, wait a second.
That's them! That's my friends!
What happened to them?
"Dominic Badguy...
"An interview with the brains behind
"the Muppets' triumphant
comeback world tour."
What?
It seems your friends do not
need you anymore.
They have forgotten about you.
Oh, no, no, no.
They wouldn't.
They couldn't.
We're a family.
"Family"?
No one believes in family
in the Gulag, frog.
People are only ever out for themselves.
(SIGHS)
Listen, Kermit.
We have annual lighthearted
Gulag Revue coming up.
It is that, or they riot.
-I thought you might help me. -Uh...
The thing is Nadya,
I'm sort of done doing that,
but thanks for the offer.
This is not offer. This is prison.
You are going to help me.
Rehearsals tomorrow, 4:00 AM.
Or I put you on The Wall.
"The Wall"?
Why would I be afraid of a wall?
Ugh! (GRUNTING)
Just direct the show.
You'll never escape.
What time did you say
that rehearsal was?
Ouch!
(CRASH GRUNTING)
CRASH: Almost... There!
-Okay. Ready, Eddie? -Set!
EDDIE: Let's roll.
-Yee-haw! -EDDIE: Wait for me!
(BOTH LAUGHING)
(BOTH WHOOPING)
Whoo-hoo!
(GRUNTS)
(GRUNTS) No brakes! Gotta roll!
Meet you at the other end!
So you think she's the girl for me?
Yeah. She's tons of fun,
and you're no fun at all.
She completes you.
Whoa!
-Yeah! -Hey! Hey, Manny!
Can you pull back the tree
and shoot me into the pond?
-No. -Oh, come on!
How do you expect to impress
Ellie with that attitude?
I don't want to impress her!
Why are you trying so hard
to convince her she's a mammoth?
Because that's what she is!
I don't care if she thinks she's a possum.
-You can't be two things. -Au contraire, mon "fered.
Tell that to the bullfrog,
the chicken hawk or turtledove.
You're never going to let up on you.
It'll be easier on all of us
if you just go with it.
(GROANS)
So, uh, what do you want me to do?
Pull back the tree
and shoot me into the pond.
I don't know.
Well, if you're too lame to do it...
-we can get Ellie. -MANNY: No, no, no.
No, I can do it. I can do it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
Come on. Come on.
-Have you done this before? -Ha! Only a million times.
Farther! Farther! Farther!
Perfect. Fire!
-(WHIMPERS) -CRASH: Yeah!
I can fly!
♪ I believe I can fly...
(GRUNTS)
Oh!
(YELLS) Crash!
Uh-oh.
Oh, Crash! Crash!
Crash, are you okay?
-What happened? -Manny shot him out of a tree.
-What's wrong with you? -He said he could do it.
And you listened to him.
Crash, whatever you do,
don't go into the light!
Can I help in any way here?
You've done enough.
-Are you happy now? -EDDIE: Crash!
Crash, don't leave me!
Who's gonna watch my back?
Who's gonna be
my wingman of mayhem?
Who's gonna roll in
that dung patch with me?
-(SOBS) -Dung patch?
Wait! My legs!
-I can stand! -He can stand!
-I can run! -He can run! It's a miracle!
-Hallelujah! -(WHOOPING)
ELLIE: Yeah!
(CHUCKLING) Ooh!
What can I say? They're boys.
They make my life a little adventure.
You guys are so dead!
Thanks for embarrassing me!
EDDIE: Ow! Not the face!
(GRUNTS)
(POSSUMS GIGGLING)
-Oh! Oh! Oh! -EDDIE: Ellie! Ellie!
Me too!
DIEGO: She's not half bad.
Crazy and confused, but sweet.
-So? -(GRUNTS)
So, what's holding you back?
(TREE TRUNK CRASHES)
My family.
You can have that again, you know.
No, Sid, I can't.
(YELPING) Okay, okay.
But... But think about it.
If you let this chance go,
you're letting your whole species go...
and that's just, uh... That's just selfish.
(SCREAMING)
I think I'm starting to get through to him.
-(LAUGHING) -Wait, wait. I got you.
-CRASH: Slowpoke! -(GRUNTING)
(SIGHS)
-MANNY: Need help? -No. No.
Just, uh, catching my breath.
-You're stuck. -I am not.
All right. Then let's go.
ELLIE: I can't.
I'm stuck.
Don't you think that picking
them up like this would be easier?
Ellie?
I know this place.
(MAMMOTHS TRUMPETING)
(TRUMPETING)
You know, deep down I knew
I was different.
I was a little bigger than the
other possum kids.
Okay, a lot bigger.
Oh!
Now I understand why the possum
boys didn't find me appealing.
That's too bad because as far
as mammoths go...
you're, uh...
You know.
What?
Well, um... Uh... Well, attractive.
-Really? -Sure.
-What about me is attractive? -Huh?
Well... Oh, well, I don't know.
Uh... Uh, well, there's your...
Uh, butt?
What about it?
It's... big?
Oh, you're just saying that!
No. No! No, I mean it. It's huge!
Biggest darn butt I've ever seen.
Oh! That is really sweet!
What a crazy day.
This morning I woke up a possum...
and now I'm a mammoth.
(CRACKING)
(GASPS AND SQUEALING)
(GASPS)
(SNIFFS AND WHINES)
(PANTING) Ooh!
(EGG CHASING LOUD)
(CHIRPS)
(CHIRPING)
-Bah! -(SQUAWKS)
-(SQUAWKING) -(SCREAMS)
(BLUBBERS)
(FEROCIOUS YELLING)
(SQUAWKING)
(PANTING AND GRUNTS)
-(SQUAWKING) -(WHIMPERING)
(CONDOR SQUAWKING LOUD)
(GRUNTS)
(WHIMPERS)
(CHIRPS)
(PEEPS)
(SCREAMS)
(CHIRPS)
(HUMMING)
(BUSHES RUSTLING)
Hmm. (HUMMING)
-Ahh! -(BUSHES RUSTLING)
Boy, Manny sure took
a big leap with Ellie today.
He sure did.
Yup. He stood on the shore
of uncertainty and dove right in.
Splash!
Kind of brave, huh,
the way he faced his fear?
I wouldn't know. Sabers don't feel fear.
Oh, come on. All animals feel fear.
It's what separates us from, say,
rocks. Rocks have no fear.
-And they sink. -What are you getting at, Sid?
It may surprise you to know
that I, too, have experienced fear.
-No! You? -Oh, yeah, yes.
As impossible as it seems,
the sloth has natural enemies...
that would like to harm
or otherwise "kill" us.
-I wonder why. -Oh, jealousy mostly.
But the point is that fear is natural.
Fear is for prey.
Well, then you're letting
the water make you its prey.
Just jump in and trust your instincts.
You know, most animals
can swim as babies.
And for a tiger, it's
like crawling on your belly...
to stalk helpless prey.
But faster, okay?
Now, claw, kick, claw, kick.
I'm stalking the prey. Claw, kick.
Now, I look back over my shoulder
to see if I'm being followed...
and I'm breathing... (INHALES)
And I'm stalking, and I'm stalking.
And I'm... (SCREAMS)
I'm falling.
Correction. You're sinking,
kind of like a rock.
(GROANS)
Oh! Hey, do we do any
special tricks like roll over...
or do we just throw our weight around?
-(GRUNTS) Whoa! -Whoops! Sorry.
I don't know my own strength yet.
Ellie, do you realize that now
we have a chance to save our species?
Really? How we gonna do that?
Oh, well, you know.
-Oh, uh-uh. Did you just... -MANNY: No, I didn't mean...
I'm not a mammoth for five minutes,
and you're hitting on me?
I wasn't saying... Not right now.
Um, in time.
I was just saying
that it's our responsibility.
-What? -Uh, all right.
That came out wrong. I...
You're very pretty, but we just met and...
Responsibility?
Just doing your duty, huh? Is that it?
Ready to make the ultimate sacrifice
to save your species.
-Uh... -Well, I got some news for you.
You're not saving the
species tonight or any other night.
(MANNY SIGHS)
JEAN PIERRE: Okay.
What about this comedian bear?
He is too stupid to be stupid.
He must be some sort of genius.
Maybe your "Lemur" hunch is correct.
(SIGHS)
Except for the tact that Les Muppets
play tomorrow night
at the Dublin Theatre.
Which just happens to be next door
to the Irish National Bank!
Maybe your Muppet hunch is...
Correct.
It's almost as if we're...
BOTH: Not so different
after
all.
Come, come, mon ami!
We must follow the Muppets to Dublin!
To Dublin!
CONSTANTINE: Kremlin!
Huh?
Putin!
MISS PIGGY: No, what are you doing?
-Okay, number five, baby. Blow. -Come on.
-There you go. You know the routine. -Come on, Diddy Daddy!
(CHEERING)
-Hey. guys? Fellas? -Whoa!
Ah!
ZOOT: Whoa, man!
Hey, did you see that?
-(WHISTLES LOUDLY) -Huh?
Um, do you guys think that Kermit's
been acting a little weird lately?
ALL: No.
(SIGHS)
You're probably right. It's just me.
(SIGHING) Bad frog.
So, how did it go?
Mmm. Not bad.
(GROANS)
ELLIE: Okay, let's go.
We traveled with you all day.
Now you're coming with us at night.
But we can't see at night.
Then enjoy the flood.
-I can't even look at him. -Pervert!
Making friends. Everywhere
you go, just making friends.
-(GRUNTS) -Watch out. There's a stump.
(STRAINED) Not anymore.
I, uh... I thought we could walk together.
Crash, ask the mammoth
why he thinks that.
She said she thinks
you're a jerk and to go away.
She didn't say... Ow!
Look, maybe if we
spend more time... Ow!
Tell him that I need
a little personal space right now.
She said go jump in a lake.
And possums rule!
-I can hear her, you know? -What do you want, a medal?
-(SCREAMING) -(GASPING)
Whoa!
(GASPING)
-Stop moving! -MANNY: Whoa!
DIEGO: Thank you.
(WHIMPERING)
Manny, Ellie! Lock trunks!
-(SCOFFS) -Now!
Crash, Eddie! Grab on to that ledge!
(GASPS)
(LAUGHS) Funny!
Now what's your real plan?
-Just do it! What I say! -Bye, Eddie.
-Bye, Crash. -Bye, Ellie!
-Go now! -(GRUNTS)
Um, uh... I'm sorry if what
I said before offended you.
What do you mean, "if" it offended me?
-Whoa! -That it offended her!
That it offended her!
I mean "that." That it offended you.
-You just overreacted, that's all. -What?
-Take it back! -There are other lives at stake here!
-Wait a minute. She's got a point. -He's got nothing!
-It was a misunderstanding! -It was insensitive!
-Apologize! -Why me? She overreacted!
-Just apologize! -MANNY: No.
-Do it! -Okay. I'm sorry.
ALL: What? ELLIE: He's right.
-I overreacted. -You mean you...
Not another word, or I'll come
down there and push you over myself!
I got it. I got it.
I got it! (YELLS)
Uh-oh.
(YELLING)
Manny! Ellie! Run! Run!
(YELLS)
I guess we finally
did something right together.
DIEGO: Hey, don't mind me.
Just hanging off the edge of a cliff here.
Whoo.
(GRUNTING)
ALL: (TUNELESSLY) ♪ Come to the end of the road
♪ Still I can't
♪ Let go
♪ It's unnatural
♪ You belong to me
♪ I belong to you ♪
Enough!
You're all terrible.
Fix this. Or it's The Wall.
Oh.
Of course.
Guys, um... (CLEARS THROAT)
It's always good to start with an
up-tempo song and dance
and then go into a comedy routine.
But we like Boyz II Men!
It is Big Papa's favorite song.
Lot of emotions in that song for him.
I'm not learning no other song.
I'm a triple threat!
A singer, a dancer and a murderer!
There you go. How do you like that?
Drum solo! Drum solo!
When do I do the
indoor running of the bulls?
What about the band's
marathon jam session?
Four of five musical numbers.
Quiet!
Now, look! We are holding
auditions tomorrow.
And if any of you have a
problem with that,
any of you, then my door is always open!
(PANTING)
Thank you, Kermit.
This is what we've
all been waiting to hear.
Teach us, Kermit.
We will do whatever frog say.
Put it there.
Good night, frog. Nice work today.
Thanks, Nadya.
Even if your friends don't
need you, we certainly do.
Good night.
-Good night, Big Papa. -'Night, Nadya.
-Good night, Carl. -Good night, Nadya.
-Good night, Prison King. -Good night, Nadya.
-Good night, Skullcrusher. -Good night.
-Good night, Danny Trejo. -Good night, Nadya.
NADYA: No one believes in family
in the Gulag, frog.
People are only ever out for themselves.
(SIGHING)
(HUMS)
(SIGHS) Remember the good old days?
Which good old days?
Oh, you know, yesterday, last week...
Back when the trees went up and down
and the ground stayed under our feet?
Ugh. (CHUCKLES) Yup.
Those were the good days.
Possums were possums
and mammoths were mammoths.
We should get some sleep.
Yeah.
Tomorrow's the day the vulture
said that we're all gonna die.
(SNORING)
(SIGHS)
(SIGHS)
(SNORING)
(TREE BRANCH CREAKING)
(SNORING)
(MUTTERING)
(SMACKING LIPS)
No, no. I don't want any.
(SNORING)
Whoop! Nyuck. Nyuck-nyuck-nyuck.
Oh, no, no, no, no. (SUCKING THUMB)
(YAWNS)
Wait a minute. Uh, can I help you?
(ALL SIGHING)
Mmm. Now, that's what I call respect.
-(GIGGLING) -Ooh! Nice.
(GASPS)
Somebody here likes Sid.
Who is your decorator?
I mean, this is fabulous.
Hmm. (GRUNTS)
-Fire King. -Huh?
Rocks.
Fire King? Hmm!
Well, you know, it's about time...
someone recognized my true potential.
Let there be fire!
(YELLS)
ALL: Oh!
-(VINE SIZZLING) -(SNIFFING)
-(GASPS) Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch! -Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch!
-Hey! -Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
Ah!
-(WHOOPING) -(WHOOPING)
(CHUCKLES)
Wacka, wacka, wacka, wacka.
Wackaka, wackaka, wackaka, wackaka,
wackaka, wackaka, wack!
-(HOOTING) -(HOOTING)
(CHANTING)
-(RHYTHMIC TONGUE CLICKING) -(RHYTHMIC TONGUE CLICKING)
Humina, humina, humina, humina,
humina, humina. (EXHALES)
Humina, humina, humina, humina,
humina, humina, ooh!
(VOCALIZING)
-(RHYTHMIC HOOTING) -(MINI-SLOTHS VOCALIZING)
-(MINI-SLOTHS CHANTING) -(MINI-SLOTHS STOMPING FEET)
(MINI-SLOTHS SQUEALING)
MINI-SLOTH: Wow!
If only the guys could see me now.
(GASPS)
This is either really good or really bad.
-(MINI-SLOTHS CHANTING) -(SCREAMS) Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
Me Fire King. Why kill Fire King?
A thousand years bad juju
for killing Fire King.
Superheated rock from the
Earth's core is surging to the crust,
melting ice built up
over thousands of years.
You're a very advanced race.
Together we can look for a solution!
We have one. Sacrifice the Fire King.
-Well, that's not very advanced.
-Worth a shot.
SID: No! No!
(SCREAMING)
(ALL CHEERING)
(SCREAMING)
(BLUBBERING)
(GRUNTS)
(SCREAMS)
(SCREAMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
Bad juju!
(GROANING)
(SCREAMING)
Ow! Ow! Ow, ow!
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh!
TINKER BELL:
Um... I know. Favorite star?
PERIWINKLE: Second star
-to the right. -To the right.
Okay. Favorite drink?
Hot chamomile tea.
Iced chamomile tea!
-Oh! -(CHUCKLES)
Okay, my turn. How about favorite bug?
Bug? It's too cold for bugs over here,
but in one of Dewey's books,
I read about butterflies.
Oh, in Butterfly Cove,
there's hundreds of them.
It's in Summer. It's right over...
Um... Hmm.
I guess you can't see it from here.
(SIGHS)
No. You can't.
What's it like over there?
Warm.
And the colors? The sounds?
All the animals. And the fish.
They swim in melted ice, right?
Water.
(SIGHS) I wish...
I wish I could go there.
-Peri? -Yeah?
I made it warmer over here.
Maybe I could make it colder over there.
Are you... (GASPS)
Are you saying I could cross?
-Yeah! -Oh, Tink.
You could show me your world.
I could meet your friends.
Do you think I could see a butterfly?
There's a pretty good chance.
-Oh! -(ICE CRACKING)
Uh, Tink?
(BOTH SCREAMING)
-I can't fly! -Tink!
Hold on. Hold on!
I'm slipping!
That's it, Fiona. That's it.
Are you girls all right?
-Yeah. -Yeah.
Are you sure? Nothing broken?
Nothing bruised?
No. We're okay.
(SIGHS) This time.
Lord Milori was right.
Crossing the border
is just too dangerous.
What are you saying?
I'm sorry, girls,
but I'm afraid this isn't going to work out
like you hoped.
We have to take Tinker Bell home.
Let's go, Fiona.
It's...
It's for your own good.
(MEOWS)
(WHIMPERING)
I can't watch, Fiona.
(SNIFFLING)
I promised myself
I wasn't going to do this.
Okay. Here's the plan.
Meet me here tomorrow.
Oh, thank goodness. I thought
you were really saying goodbye.
No! I just met my sister
I never knew I had
and I'm going to say goodbye forever?
Are you kidding?
So... (WHISPERING)
Clank? Bobble?
Guys?
(SCREAMS)
(TINKER BELL GROANS)
Oopsie.
(GASPS) Tink! You're back!
(GRUNTS)
-Yes. (CHUCKLES) -CLANK: Sorry!
We thought you were a troll.
A troll?
I knew we shouldn't have used
the troll stopper.
What if it was a troll?
You'd be saying something different,
wouldn't you?
Guys. It doesn't matter.
Oh, right.
-I need your help. -Is it about a glacier?
No. But it's kind of a secret.
I don't want everybody to know.
(BOTH GASP)
I'm pretty sure these buttons will work,
but we're going to need more of them.
Aye, unless we use
a couple of acorn caps.
Right! Good idea.
Whoo! Now where is that Clanky?
CLANK: Oh, yes, I'm right here.
Oh!
I didn't tell everybody.
Just Fawn, Ro, Sil, Dess, and Vidia.
So, there's another you.
-Vidia! -Yeah.
I've got a sister.
(CHUCKLES) I told you!
Bust my bonnet.
SILVERMIST: Amazing! FAWN: It's fantastic!
I can't believe this is happening.
But how?
They were born of the same laugh!
Tell them, Tink,
what you told me and Bobble.
Her name's Periwinkle.
She's a Frost Fairy,
and she's just amazing.
I'm making this machine
so she can come here and meet you all,
and after that
we'll go straight to Queen Clarion!
Oh...
Um, have you thought this through?
"Hi, Queen Clarion. Meet the Winter
Fairy I smuggled over the border."
Vidia!
When Queen Clarion
hears how we found each other,
and that we're sisters,
she will change Lord Milori's rule.
Oh, of course she will.
She'd never want you to be apart.
It's like you found the perfect lost thing.
And I'm never going to lose her.
Well, then, let's get to work!
Just tell us what to do.
Great!
Okay. We need to place
that wheel right here.
IRIDESSA: Got you, Tink.
And let's get that propped up over there.
ROSETTA: I feel so tinkery.
-Clank, Bobble... -Wait, wait.
Finish up the chassis?
Exactly.
-Come on, Clanky! -Bobble!
Perhaps you and I are brothers!
It's possible.
We look almost exactly alike.
(CITIZENS TALKING INDISTINCTLY)
No, no. You've got the bark facing down.
The bark needs to be face-up.
-Bark down is drier. -MAN 1: Bark up!
MAN 2: Bark down! BOY: Papa!
Cloak? Does anyone need a cloak?
Arendelle is indebted to you,
Your Highness.
The castle is open.
There is soup and hot
glogg in the great hall.
Here, pass these out.
Prince Hans!
Are we expected
to just sit here and freeze
while you give away all
of Arendelle's tradable goods?
Princess Anna has given her orders.
And that's another thing!
Has it dawned on you that your
princess may be conspiring
with the wicked sorceress
to destroy us all?
Do not question the princess.
She left me in charge
and I will not hesitate
to protect Arendelle from treason.
(STAMMERING) Treason?
(HORSE WHINNYING)
-(ALL GASP) -(WOMAN SCREAMS)
(PEOPLE PANICKING)
Whoa! Whoa!
Whoa, boy. Easy.
Easy.
MAN: It's Princess Anna's horse.
WOMAN 1: So, where is the princess?
WOMAN 2: Where could she be? WOMAN 3: Where is she?
Princess Anna is in trouble.
I need volunteers to go
with me to find her.
-I'll go. -I volunteer.
I volunteer two men, My Lord.
Be prepared for anything.
And should you encounter the queen,
you are to put an end to this winter.
-Do you understand? -Hmm.
So, how exactly are you
planning to stop this weather?
Oh. I am gonna talk to my sister.
That's your plan?
My ice business is riding on
you talking to your sister?
-Yep. -(GRUNTS)
So, you're not at all afraid of her?
-Why would I be? -Yeah.
I bet she's the nicest,
gentlest, warmest person ever.
Oh. Look at that.
I've been impaled. (CHUCKLING)
What now?
KRISTOFF: Mmm...
It's too steep.
I've only got one rope and you
don't know how to climb mountains.
-ANNA: Says who? -(GRUNTS)
Hmm?
What are you doing?
I'm going to see my sister.
You're gonna kill yourself.
-(GRUNTS) -I wouldn't put my foot there.
-You're distracting me. -Or there.
How do you know
Elsa even wants to see you?
ANNA: All right. I'm just blocking you out
because I gotta concentrate, here.
(GRUNTING)
You know, most people who disappear
into the mountains want to be alone.
Nobody wants to be alone.
Except maybe you.
I'm not alone. I have friends, remember?
ANNA: You mean, the love experts?
Yes, the love experts.
(GRUNTS) Ah...
Please tell me I'm almost there.
Does the air seem a bit
thin to you up here?
-(ANNA PANTING) -(CHUCKLES)
Hang on.
OLAF: Hey, Sven?
Not sure if this is gonna
solve the problem,
but I found a staircase that leads exactly
where you wanted to go.
Ha-ha! Thank goodness. Catch!
(BOTH GRUNT)
Thanks. That was like a
crazy trust exercise.
(OLAF CHUCKLING)
BOTH: Whoa.
Now, that's ice.
I might cry.
Go ahead. I won't judge.
(GRUNTS)
All right, take it easy, boy. Come here.
I got you. (GRUNTS)
Okay. You stay right here, buddy.
(WHISTLES)
Flawless.
Knock.
Just knock.
Why isn't she knocking?
Do you think she knows how to knock?
(GASPS)
(EXHALES) Huh. It opened.
That's a first.
Oh. You should probably wait out here.
-What? -The last time I introduced her to a guy,
she froze everything.
But, but... Oh, come on!
It's a palace made of ice. Ice is my life!
Bye, Sven.
You, too, Olaf.
-Me? -Just give us a minute.
Okay.
(SOFTLY) One, two,
-three... -BOTH: Four...
(WHISTLE BLOWING)
WALTER: Well, well, well.
What's he up to?
(PEOPLE TALKING INDISTINCTLY)
Hmm.
Huh?
(PEOPLE TALKING INDISTINCTLY)
(GASPS)
(PANTING)
Anyone see you?
No.
I can't believe we're doing this!
So, did you bring it?
Yes. (WHISTLES)
Watch the branch.
(ALL GRUNTING)
Careful. More to the right.
For the record, we shouldn't be doing
this. Whatever it is we're doing.
As ordered. One big block of ice.
Courtesy of our resident glacier fairy.
Hey.
So, what do you think?
It's perfect!
(WHISTLES)
Uh, are you sure
she's not luring you into a trap?
Oh! It's one of those...
Things we shouldn't be doing?
It's a snowmaker!
It makes snow!
Yep, this is your ticket
to the warm side of Pixie Hollow.
-(GASPS) -Wait a second.
This is crazy!
You don't even know if this thing works!
(LAUGHS) Oh, it works, all right.
Aye, we made it ourselves.
Of course you did. Just walk away.
How does it work?
Guys?
Pull.
Move this around here.
You might want to
step aside for this part.
(ALL EXCLAIM)
SLED: Ha! They're serious.
(GASPING) Snow!
Wow.
You did it! You actually did it!
Ooh! It's cold.
So?
Hmm.
Go, go on.
Live it, man.
Whoa!
CLANK: Welcome, Miss Winkle.
Thank you.
All righty! Your tour begins
with the Autumn Forest.
Next it's a quick stop
in Springtime Square.
And finally, the Pixie Dust Tree,
which, as you know,
makes all fairy life possible.
Aye, that's where you'll be meeting
her majestiness, the queen.
The queen?
They're going to see the queen!
She's very wise.
And if we tell her we're sisters,
she'll change Lord Milori's rule.
That is so exciting!
Say hi for me, or curtsy,
or whatever it is you do.
-Sure. -And bring me back an acorn. A big one!
-After you. -Thank you.
Bye!
(SQUEALS) I can't believe
I'm going to get an acorn!
Finally! That is so exciting!
(TWITTERS)
DOMINIC: Gentlemen.
I need this review
to go into Friday's paper.
Super positive. Five stars.
I won't be paid off for a review.
I'm a journalist.
I'm joking, of course. Cash or credit?
-(STATUE BREAKING) -Oh!
-What was that? -Rats.
Who cares?
(WHISTLES)
Hand these tickets out to
anyone who will take one.
In fact, you may have to actually
pay people to come.
It's the Muppets. It's not gonna be easy.
Mmm. Oh.
And I want a standing ovation.
Oh, dear.
Where does he keep
all those suitcases?
(MUNCHING)
FOZZIE: Hmm. Let's see here.
What's Kermit doing
on the cover of this newspaper?
(SHRIEKS)
(LAUGHS)
(PANTING) Oh! Ow!
Dominic's the bad guy!
Dominic's the bad guy!
-Fozzie! -Mmm?
Dominic's the reason
we've been selling out our shows!
He's been giving away tickets
and bribing journalists
to write great reviews!
(GROANS) Why didn't
we ever think of doing that?
Huh?
I mean, that's terrible!
The question is, why?
And could it have anything to do with
why Kermit's been acting
so weird lately?
Hey, wanna see something funny?
Yes, Constantine,
the world's most dangerous frog.
Fozzie, what does he have to do
with what I just told you?
Nothing, but check this out.
A-ha!
Oh, look, it's Kermit.
FOZZIE: A-ha!
(SHRIEKS)
What did you do with Kermit?
(LIGHTNING CRASHES)
Wait a minute.
Fozzie...
What if Kermit has been replaced
by this Constantine guy?
(BULB BUZZES)
Nah, that's impossible. We'd all notice!
Wouldn't we?
(KNOCKING)
Kermit?
Are... Are you there?
Hello?
FOZZIE: Kermit?
Everything's fine. Let's get out of here.
-Wait! -Whoa!
We should look around.
(TICKING)
Huh. Kermit's got a big bomb collection.
Looks like he's planning
some sort of comedy heist bit.
I hope not. Those never work.
Mmm.
WALTER: What's that?
(GASPS)
Oh, no.
What, what, what? What?
Oh, no.
(BOTH SCREAMING)
-We got to get out of here! -Yeah!
Not so fast.
Where's Kermit?
What do you want?
You have wocka-ed
your last wocka, bear.
(YELLS)
Huh?
-Bad frog! -FOZZIE: Animal!
-Oh, good boy! -Great job!
-Thank you. -(GASPING)
(CONSTANTINE GROANS)
-(GROWLS) -(ALL SCREAM)
Quick! The freight train!
Go, go, go!
(ALL YELLING)
(GROWLS)
(EXCLAIMS)
We got to go back! Warn the others!
I tried. They didn't believe me.
It's our word against his and,
well, he's fooled them all.
Should we go to the police?
We don't have any evidence!
(SIGHING) I feel terrible.
I'm the one who talked Kermit
into doing this tour in the first place.
I wish Kermit was here!
He would know what to do.
You're right.
There's only one guy
in this world who can save us.
Only one frog who can restore order,
bring justice,
and set things right!
You are talking about Kermit, right?
Yes, Fozzie. Kermit.
-(UPBEAT TUNE PLAYING ON PIANO) -Turn, turn, out, in, jump, step,
kick, kick, leap, kick, touch.
Got it? From the top.
A-five, six, seven, eight.
ALL: ♪ God, I hope I get it
♪ I hope I get it
-♪ How many people does he need? -♪ How many people does he need?
♪ God, I hope I get it
♪ I hope I get it
♪ How many boys, how many girls?
♪ How many boys, how many?
♪ Look at all the people
♪ At all the people
MAXIMUM SECURITY PRISONER:
♪ How many people does he need?
♪ How many boys, how many girls?
♪ How many people does he...
DANNY TREJO: ♪ I really need this job
♪ Please, God, I need this job
♪ I've got to get this job
Good!
Great!
That's it, guys, that's it!
That's good, guys! Come on!
And hit it hard!
♪ I really need this job
♪ Please, God, I need this job
♪ I've got to get this job ♪
Okay. All right. Yes.
(CLEARS THROAT)
Uh, Nadya?
I think perhaps we should, perhaps,
keep it prisoners only.
Of course. I just love Broadway.
But you are right, Kermit, as ever.
Okay. Thank you.
(CLEARS THROAT)
Okay, fellas, listen up.
Here's who made the cut.
Sergei! King! That's you.
You are always right,
my beautiful amphibian prince.
I will never let you go.
PERIWINKLE: Wow.
(LAUGHING)
(WHOOPING)
WOMAN: ♪ Just when
we thought life couldn't get much better
♪ A wish we never knew
we made came true
♪ Worlds that were apart
have come together
-ROSETTA: There she is! -She's so wintery.
♪ We'll be friends
no matter what the weather
This is so exciting!
Wait for the signal.
♪ Wait until you see the wondrous
things that we can do here with you
That's it. Operation Periwinkle in effect.
♪ We're on your side
♪ We're on your side
♪ Let's take this ride
♪ Let's take this ride
(GASPING)
♪ And together we're facing the world
♪ Doing things nobody's done before
♪ And the great divide
♪ Doesn't seem so wide ♪
(LAUGHING)
Butterflies!
ALL: Surprise!
Oh! Your friends did all this?
They wanted to surprise you.
Everyone, this is Periwinkle, my sister.
IRIDESSA: This is so exciting.
-Oh, wow! -Can you believe it?
Hello. It is nice to meet you.
I am Rosetta. This is...
She's a Winter Fairy.
She's not from the moon.
Oh, right. I know, I know.
I'm just so excited!
It's great to meet all of you.
This is so remarkable!
You two are sisters!
Yeah. A little fairy-to-fairy advice.
Tink can be tricky
to get along with at times.
Yeah. Look who's talking.
We can't believe you're over here!
So... Are you cold enough?
Yeah. It's perfect.
Oh! (CHUCKLES)
ALL: Aw!
Oh, I nearly forgot.
This is for you.
It's called a periwinkle. Also.
Thank you.
I'll keep it forever.
Whoa.
Elsa?
It's me, Anna.
(EXCLAIMS)
-ELSA: Anna. -(GASPS)
Whoa. Elsa, you look different.
It's a good different.
And this place...
It's amazing.
Thank you.
I never knew what I was capable of.
I'm so sorry about what happened.
If I'd have known...
No, no, no. It's okay.
You don't have to apologize,
but you should probably go.
Please.
But I just got here.
You belong down in Arendelle.
So do you.
No, Anna, I belong here.
Alone.
Where I can be who I am
without hurting anybody.
Actually, about that...
-OLAF: Sixty! -Wait. What is that?
Hi! I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs!
Olaf?
Yeah. You built me.
Remember that?
And you're alive?
(STAMMERS) Um... I think so.
He's just like the one we built as kids.
Yeah.
Elsa, we were so close.
We can be like that again.
YOUNG ANNA: Catch me! YOUNG ELSA: Slow down!
(GRUNTS)
Anna!
(GASPS) No.
We can't. Goodbye, Anna.
Elsa, wait.
No, I'm just trying to protect you.
You don't have to protect me.
I'm not afraid.
Please don't shut me out again.
♪ Please don't slam the door
♪ You don't have to keep Your distance anymore
♪ 'Cause for the first time in forever
♪ I finally understand
♪ For the first time in forever
♪ We can fix this hand in hand
We can head down
this mountain together.
♪ You don't have to live in fear
♪ 'Cause for the first time in forever
♪ I will be right here
Anna.
♪ Please go back home
♪ Your life awaits
♪ Go enjoy the sun And open up the gates
-Yeah, but... -I know.
♪ You mean well But leave me be
♪ Yes, I'm alone
♪ But I'm alone and free
♪ Just stay away And you'll be safe from me
♪ Actually, we're not
♪ What do you mean, you're not?
♪ I get the feeling you don't know
♪ What do I not know?
♪ Arendelle's in deep, deep, deep
♪ Deep snow
What?
(ALL GASPING)
Look at that!
It's frost.
She and her friends practice
in the Frost Forest. You should see it!
Oh, you should see Tink on ice skates.
(CHUCKLES) She's a natural.
It's only because you had that lost thing.
-Uh, she collects lost things, too? -BOTH: Yeah!
SILVERMIST: You guys are so alike.
You kind of set off an
eternal winter everywhere.
Everywhere?
Well, it's okay, you can just unfreeze it.
No, I can't. I don't know how.
Sure you can. I know you can.
♪ 'Cause for the first time in forever
♪ Oh, I'm such a fool! I can't be free!
♪ You don't have to be afraid
♪ No escape from the storm inside of me
♪ We can work this out together
♪ I can't control the curse!
♪ We'll reverse the storm you've made
♪ Anna, please you'll only make it worse!
♪ Don't panic There's so much fear!
♪ We'll make the sun shine bright
♪ You're not safe here!
♪ We can face this thing together
♪ No!
♪ We can change this winter weather
♪ And everything will be all right
♪ I can't! ♪
(GASPING)
I know.
Even our wings are identical.
That's why they sparkled.
-Let's show them. -I don't feel so...
Oh! Periwinkle!
FAWN: Is she all right?
I think she's getting a little too hot.
My wings... I can't feel them.
(GASPING)
I think they're too warm.
Oh, the snowmaker!
It's running out of ice!
We have to get her back to the border!
Tink, what about the queen?
There's no time.
Clank, grab some ice.
We'll wrap her wings.
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(GROANS)
(GASPS)
KRISTOFF: Anna!
Are you okay?
I'm okay.
I'm fine.
Who's this?
Wait, it doesn't matter. Just...
You have to go.
No, I know we can
figure this out together.
How?
What power do you have
to stop this winter?
To stop me?
Anna, I think we should we should go.
No, I'm not leaving without you, Elsa.
Yes, you are.
-(LOW GROWLING) -(GASPS)
(GROWLS)
ANNA: Stop! Put us down!
-Go away. -(ALL SCREAMING)
(SHUDDERING)
(BOTH YELP)
Heads up!
Watch out for my butt!
(BOTH GASP)
It is not nice to throw people!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, feisty-pants.
Okay, relax.
-Just calm down! Calm down! -Okay! All right!
-I'm okay. -Just let the snowman be.
-I'm calm. -Great.
-(GRUNTS) -Oh! Come on!
(ROARING)
Oh. Look, see?
Now, you made him mad.
I'll distract him. You guys go.
No, no! Not you guys!
(MUFFLED)
This just got a whole lot harder.
Be careful. Gentle. Easy.
Okay. Let's go. Hurry!
CLANK: All together. All together.
ROSETTA: All together.
SILVERMIST: Hurry!
We can do this!
(ALL STRAINING)
Hurry!
Go, go, go!
Hold on. We're almost there.
BOBBLE: Hurry! It's nearly out of ice!
TINKER BELL: Not much further.
-(ANNA SHRIEKS) -(GROWLS)
KRISTOFF: Look out!
(ANNA SCREAMING)
(ROARS)
-(ANNA GASPS) -(BOTH PANTING)
KRISTOFF: Run! Run!
KRISTOFF: What are you doing?
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
I got him! (LAUGHS)
KRISTOFF: Whoa! Stop!
ANNA: It's a 100-foot drop.
KRISTOFF: It's 200.
-Ow! -(MARSHMALLOW ROARS)
-What's that for? -I'm digging a snow anchor.
Okay. What if we fall?
There's 20 feet of fresh
powder down there.
It'll be like landing on a pillow.
Hopefully.
(GASPS)
(ROARING)
Okay, Anna. On three.
ANNA: Okay. KRISTOFF: One...
You tell me when. I'm ready to go.
-Two... -I was born ready! Yes!
Calm down.
(GRUNTS)
ANNA: Tree!
What the... Whoa!
-(BOTH GRUNT) -KRISTOFF: That happened.
(PANTING) Man, am I out of shape.
(GASPS)
There we go. Hey, Anna!
Sven! Where did you guys go?
We totally lost Marshmallow back there.
Hey! We were just talking about you.
All good things, all good things.
No!
(GRUNTING)
This is not making much
of a difference, is it?
(SHRIEKS)
Olaf!
(GRUNTS) Hang in there, guys!
Go. Go faster!
(BOTH STRUGGLING)
-Wait, what? -KRISTOFF: Hey!
(MARSHMALLOW GROWLING)
-(BOTH EXCLAIM) -Ow!
Kristoff!
(ANNA GASPING)
Don't come back!
We won't.
-(GRUNTING) -(BOTH SCREAMING)
Don't worry. We're almost there.
We're going to make it.
We're going to make it!
Let me help you.
(PANTING)
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
(GASPING)
Hey, you were right.
Just like a pillow. (CHUCKLES)
-(OLAF PANTING) -Olaf!
I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my legs!
(COUGHING)
-Those are my legs. -Ooh!
Hey, do me a favor, grab my butt.
Oh. That feels better.
Hey, Sven! He found us.
Who's my cute little reindeer?
-Don't talk to him like that. -(CHUCKLING)
You're tickling me.
Please, can you help her?
Tink.
Here.
Whoa!
Are you okay?
Thank you.
-How's your head? -Ah! Ooh!
(STAMMERING)
It's fine. Uh...
Uh, I'm good. I've got a thick skull.
I don't have a skull.
Or bones.
So, uh... So, now what?
Gently. Lift your wings.
Let the cold surround them.
You're okay. Your wings are okay.
Yeah. Yeah.
This is why we do not cross the border.
No, it could've worked!
We just needed a bigger piece of ice!
And when that was gone?
Your wings could have broken.
But they didn't. I'm fine. Thanks to them.
The rule is there to protect you.
I'm sorry.
You two may never see
each other again.
Oh, please don't do this.
We belong together.
We're sisters.
We were born of the same laugh.
All the more reason you should want
to keep each other safe.
Return home.
(SNIFFLES)
Come on, Tink. Let's go home.
No!
Lord Milori,
your rule will not keep us apart.
QUEEN CLARION: Tinker Bell.
This is not Lord Milori's rule. It's mine.
Queen Clarion?
I'm sorry.
Now what? (CHUCKLES)
Now what?
Oh...
What am I gonna do?
She threw me out.
I can't go back to Arendelle
with the weather like this.
And then there's your ice business.
Hey, hey.
Don't worry about my ice business.
-Worry about your hair! -What?
I just fell off a cliff.
You should see your hair.
No, yours is turning white.
White? It's... What?
It's because she struck you, isn't it?
Does it look bad?
-No. -You hesitated.
No, I didn't.
Anna, you need help, okay? Come on.
(SIGHS)
You should get deeper into the cold.
Back to the north side of the mountain.
(SIGHS DEEPLY)
Okay! Where are we going?
To see my friends.
The love experts?
-Love experts? -Uh-huh.
And don't worry,
they'll be able to fix this.
How do you know?
Because I've seen them do it before.
I like to consider myself a love expert.
(SVEN GRUNTS)
(URGES OWL)
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
Get it together.
Control it.
Don't feel. Don't feel.
Don't feel.
Don't feel! (GASPS)
(ICE CRACKLING)
This is better.
Oh... What's wrong? You only ever
knit when you're stressed.
CONSTANTINE: The bear,
the little guy and their dog,
they are onto us.
They got away.
How are we gonna spin this?
CONSTANTINE: Comrades,
I'm afraid I have bad news.
Walter and Fonzie
have quit the Muppets.
-(ALL GASP) -LEW ZEALAND: Wait.
You can quit the Muppets?
Wait a second.
Walter quit the Muppets?
We just did a whole movie
where he joined the Muppets.
Yeah, we sure spent a lot of time on it.
RIZZO: Ha! I'll say.
Maybe even at the expense of other
long-standing, beloved Muppets.
Come on, Robin.
(SIGHS)
Coming.
Well, as the old saying goes...
The show must continue,
-in a timely fashion. -GONZO: Wait.
Fozzie and Walter are part of our family.
We can't let them go without a fight.
Right, Kermit?
I know this is hard, Gonzo.
Walter and Fonzie were my best friends.
MISS PIGGY: Kermit...
Are you sure you're okay?
Yes, I'm fine, pig.
I could never lose you.
You complete me.
Oh, Kermie.
DOMINIC: Guys, come on!
This is gonna be fantastic.
We should be celebrating!
Yes. Remember,
I can give you what you want.
-Yeah? -Yeah, right.
-I'll keep that in mind. -Say, has anyone seen Animal?
(SHIVERING)
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
(PANTING)
Does anybody else feel like
we're traveling in circles?
(GASPS)
There it is!
Finally!
DEWEY: Speaking of sparkling,
we can conclude...
that it spreads in a spiral
and circles the center.
Oh!
(WIND WHISTLES)
Hello?
Hello?
(SIGHS)
LORD MILORI: Peri?
Queen Clarion. Why?
Tinker Bell.
Long ago,
when Pixie Hollow was very young,
two fairies met and fell in love.
One of them was a Winter Fairy...
...and the other
was from the warm seasons.
The two fairies were enchanted
with each other.
and every sunset,
they met at the border...
...where Spring touches Winter.
But as their love grew stronger,
they wished to be together...
...and share each other's worlds.
So they disregarded the danger
and crossed.
One of them broke a wing.
(GASPS)
For which there is no cure.
From that day forward,
Queen Clarion decreed
that fairies must never again
cross the border.
And I agreed that our two worlds
should forever remain apart.
And the two fairies?
What happened to them?
They had to say goodbye.
(GASPS)
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
ALL: ♪ Take me by the tongue and I'll know you
♪ Kiss me on the cheek And I'll show you
♪ All the moves like Jagger
♪ I've got the moves like Jagger I've got the...
Do you have evidence
to frame the bear?
Excellent.
Where are the guards?
(CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)
(LAUGHING)
Stay here.
-I'm going to check on the vault. -Oui.
-(JACKHAMMERING) -Whoa! Whoa!
Stop it!
BOTH: Whoa!
DOMINIC: Colonel Blood's locket.
Of course. Now grab it.
SAM THE EAGLE: Shawn.
Someone's coming. Abort!
I think I just saw something.
It's headed back towards the theater!
♪ Near, far
♪ Wherever you are...
-That was close. -Too close.
We need to move to final
phase three. "Wedding."
♪ You're here
Hey, Kermit, you can't go out there.
It's Piggy's Celine Dion number.
Whoa!
♪ And I know that my heart will...
Did you see anything?
Not a thing. It is my lunch hour.
It lasts six hours.
Excuse me.
Ladies and gentlemen!
I have an announcement!
-What? -(ALL MURMURING)
MISS PIGGY: Kermit,
I'm in the middle of a song here!
Miss Piggy.
I have very important question for you.
Yeah? What are you doing?
-(SNORING) -(ALL MURMURING)
Do you wish to become Mrs. Piggy?
-(GASPS) -Or rather, Mrs. The Frog?
Aw.
Oh, Kermie, I thought you'd never ask.
I really thought you'd never ask!
So?
What do you say?
(WHISPERING) It's beautiful.
(SCREAMS) Yes! Yes! Of course! Yes!
I can't believe this! After all this time,
it was finally just so easy!
Hmm.
That's right, folks,
it's the Muppet wedding
the world has been waiting for.
We're putting our tour on hold...
ALL: What?
...to be married in two days' time
at the world's most romantic location,
-the Tower of London. -(MISS PIGGY GASPS)
(ALL CLAMORING)
Here's a Muppet newsflash.
The years of waiting are over.
The biggest "Will they,
won't they?" of all times
has been answered with a firm,
"They will."
Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy
are to be married!
That's right, folks.
They're finally tying the knot.
(SOBBING)
Well, at least they
didn't get the pot of gold.
No, they did not.
I have never been to a
more ridiculous crime scene.
(JEAN PIERRE GASPS)
The comedian bear, he was here.
SAM THE EAGLE: The Lemur.
He, too, was here.
Could the comedian bear and the
Lemur be one and the same?
The comedian bear is the Lemur.
That is brilliant.
But why would he steal a
bunch of old bones?
The bones apparently belonged
to one Colonel Thomas Blood.
He was the only man to ever nearly
steal the Crown Jewels of England.
Wait! Where did the frog
say he was getting married?
The Tower of London.
BOTH: The comedian bear
is planning on stealing...
-The Tower of London! -The Crown Jewels!
The Crown Jewels.
(SIGHS)
Sir, where would you like the flowers?
Who cares?
Hey, chief.
Hi-lo.
We've all been thinking, and...
Well, after you and
Miss Piggy get married
what's gonna happen to the tour?
And to us?
Well, now you guys have all
the freedom you want.
You don't need me.
I'm done with Muppets.
-Huh? -(ALL GASP)
But, hey, it's been a good run, right?
Hmm?
Good luck.
FLOYD: Kermit!
Did he just say what I thought he said?
What are we gonna do without Kermit?
The only thing we can do.
Pack up, go to the wedding,
and head back home.
Oh, Foo Foo, it's always been a fight.
But this is so easy,
it just doesn't feel right.
(WHIMPERING)
♪ This is my dream come true
♪ The day has come for us to say "I do"
♪ There's nowhere else I'd rather be
♪ Nothing in the world means more to me than you
♪ I've waited so patiently
♪ I knew you were the only frog for me
♪ Always knew this day would come
♪ It's written in the stars It's destiny
♪ So how can something so right
♪ Feel so wrong tonight?
♪ After all we've been through
♪ Why do I feel I don't know you?
♪ We'll settle down and start a family
♪ Have a mini you and a mini me
♪ A little pink frog and a little green piggy
♪ They'll learn to say hello and say goodbye
♪ We'll grow grey and old
♪ And live the quiet life
♪ Just you and I
♪ Hand in hand we'll stay together
Hey. Look at that sky.
♪ Forever and ever
Oh!
♪ So how can something so right
♪ Feel so wrong tonight?
♪ After all we've been through
♪ Why do I feel I don't know you?
♪ How can something so right feel so wrong inside?
♪ How can something so good leave me feeling so bad?
♪ How can my dreams coming true
♪ Leave me lonely and blue?
♪ How come the happiest day of my life is so sad?
♪ How can I feel the high when I feel so low?
♪ After all we've been through after coming so far
♪ Is this my destiny?
♪ Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi
♪ Where is the love that's written
♪ In the stars?
♪ How can something so right
(VOCALIZING)
♪ Feel so wrong tonight?
♪ Hey-hey-hey
♪ After all we've been through
♪ Why do I feel I don't
♪ Know you? ♪
(VOCALIZING)
Oh, Kermie.
Look, Sven, the sky is awake.
(SHIVERING)
-Are you cold? -A little.
(CLEARS THROAT) Uh...
Wait. Come here.
Huh?
Ooh. (SIGHS)
So, uh, about my friends. Well...
(CHUCKLES)
I say "friends"...
They're more like family.
Anyway, when I was a kid,
it was just me and Sven.
Until they, you know, kinda took us in.
-They did? -Yeah.
I don't want to scare you.
They can be a little
inappropriate and loud.
(CHUCKLES) Very loud.
They are also stubborn at times,
and a little overbearing.
And heavy. Really, really, heavy.
(STAMMERS) But you'll get it.
They mean well.
Kristoff, they sound wonderful.
Okay, then.
-(OLAF GRUNTS) -Meet my family.
Hey, guys.
They're rocks.
KRISTOFF: You are
a sight for sore eyes.
(WHISPERS) He's crazy.
Rocko's looking sharp, as usual.
Clay, whoa... I don't even recognize you.
You lost so much weight.
(WHISPERS)
I'll distract him while you run.
(IN LOUD VOICE) Hi, Sven's family!
It's nice to meet you.
(WHISPERS) Because I love you,
Anna, I insist you run.
(IN LOUD VOICE) I understand
you're love experts. Ooh!
(WHISPERS) Why aren't you running?
Uh...
Okay. Well, I'm gonna go.
-OLAF: Go. -No, no, no. Anna, wait.
(GASPS)
Kristoff! (GASPING)
KRISTOFF: Whoa! (CHUCKLING)
Hey!
Kristoff's home!
(ALL CLAMORING EXCITEDLY)
-TROLL 1: Kristoff's here! -Kristoff's home!
-Wait, "Kristoff"? -Uh-huh.
Ah, let me look at you.
Take off your clothes, I wash them.
No! No, I'm going to keep my clothes on.
Look, it's great to see you all,
but where's Grandpabbie?
TROLL KID: He's napping.
But look, I grew a mushroom.
-I... -I earned my fire crystal.
I passed a kidney stone.
Kristoff, pick me up.
(GRUNTS) You're getting big.
Good for you.
Trolls. They're trolls!
He's brought a girl!
ALL: (CHEERING) A girl!
-Whoa! -TROLL 2: Is that a real girl?
TROLL 3: She's like a little cupcake.
What's going on?
I've learned to just roll with it.
Let me see. Bright eyes, working nose,
-strong teeth! -(CHUCKLES)
Yes, yes. She'll do nicely for our Kristoff.
Wait, wait, wait. Oh, um, no.
-No. (CHUCKLES) -You've got the wrong idea.
No. That's not why I brought her here.
Right. We're not... I'm not...
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
What's the issue, dear?
Why are you holding back
from such a man?
♪ Is it the clumpy way he walks?
-What? -♪ Or the grumpy way he talks?
-Oh, no. -♪ Or the pear-shaped, square-shaped
♪ Weirdness of his feet?
KRISTOFF: Hey!
♪ And though we know he washes well
♪ He always ends up sort of smelly
♪ But you'll never meet a fella
BOTH: ♪ Who's as sensitive and sweet
-(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) -That's nice, but...
BOTH: ♪ So, he's a bit of a fixer-upper
-Whoa, whoa, whoa... -♪ So, he's got a few flaws
TROLL 1: ♪ Like his peculiar brain, dear
TROLL 2: ♪ His thing with the reindeer
BOTH: ♪ That's a little outside of nature's laws
This is not about me!
♪ So, he's a bit of a fixer-upper
♪ But this we're certain of
♪ You can fix this fixer-upper up
-♪ With a little bit of love -Um...
Can we please
just stop talking about this?
We've got a real, actual problem, here.
I'll say. So, tell me, dear...
♪ Is it the way that he runs scared?
♪ Or that he's socially impaired?
♪ Or that he only likes To tinkle in the woods?
I did not need to know that
♪ Are you holding back your fondness
♪ Due to his unmanly blondness?
(CHUCKLES)
♪ Or the way he covers up That he's the honest goods?
♪ He's just a bit of a fixer-upper
♪ He's got a couple of bugs
-No, I don't! -♪ His isolation is confirmation
-♪ Of his desperation for healing hugs -Aw.
♪ So, he's a bit of a fixer-upper
♪ But we know what to do
♪ The way to fix up this fixer-upper
♪ Is to fix him up with you
BOTH: Whoa!
Stop it, stop it, stop it! Enough!
She is engaged to someone else, okay?
♪ So, she's a bit of a fixer-upper
♪ That's a minor thing
♪ Her quote "engagement" Is a flex arrangement
♪ And by the way, I don't see no ring
♪ So, she's a bit of a fixer-upper
-Hey! Whoa, watch it! -♪ Her brain's a bit betwixt
♪ Get the fiancé out of the way
♪ And the whole thing will be fixed
(GROANS)
(ALL VOCALIZING)
♪ We're not saying you can change him
♪ 'Cause people don't really change
♪ We're only saying that love's a force
♪ That's powerful and strange
♪ People make bad choices
♪ If they're mad or scared or stressed
♪ But throw a little love their way
♪ Throw a little love their way
♪ And you'll bring out their best
♪ True love brings out the best
♪ Everyone's a bit of a fixer-upper
♪ That's what it's all about
-Father! -Sister!
-♪ Brother! -♪ We need each other to raise us up
♪ And round us out
♪ Everyone's a bit of a fixer-upper
♪ But when push comes to shove
♪ The only fixer-upper fixer
♪ That can fix a fixer-upper is...
♪ True, true
♪ True
♪ Love!
♪ Love, love, love
♪ Love True love
♪ True
Do you, Anna, take Kristoff
to be your trollfully wedded...
-Wait, what? -You're getting married.
-♪ Love! ♪ -(HYPERVENTILATING)
Anna?
She's as cold as ice.
There is strange magic here.
-Grandpabbie. -Come, come. Bring her here to me.
Anna, your life is in danger.
There is ice in your heart
put there by your sister.
If not removed, to solid ice
will it freeze, forever.
What? No.
But you can remove it, right?
I cannot.
I'm sorry, Kristoff.
If it was her head, that would be easy.
But only an act of true love
can thaw a frozen heart.
An act of true love?
A true love's kiss, perhaps?
(GASPING)
TROLL 1: Something's wrong. TROLL 2: Are you all right?
Anna, we've got to get you back to Hans.
Hans.
Pull us out, Sven.
(BOTH GRUNTING)
Olaf, come on!
-I'm coming! -(TROLL KIDS GIGGLING)
Let's go kiss Hans!
Who is this Hans?
(SOLDIERS TALKING INDISTINCTLY)
We are here to find Princess Anna.
Be on guard,
but no harm is to come to the queen.
Do you understand?
-SOLDIER 1: Yes, Your Grace. -(SOLDIERS AGREEING)
-(GROWLS) -(GASPS)
(ALL CLAMORING)
(ROARS)
The queen.
(GRUNTS)
DUKE'S THUG 2: Go, go! Come on!
(GASPING)
DUKE'S THUG 1: There!
DUKE'S THUG 2: Up there!
Come in!
DUKE'S THUG 2: We got her.
No. Please.
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
DUKE'S THUG 2: Go around. Toss it.
Stay away!
DUKE'S THUG 1: Look out!
DUKE'S THUG 2: Fire! Fire!
Get her!
(MARSHMALLOW GROWLS)
Ah!
(YELLS)
Come in!
(YELLS)
(ROARING)
-(GRUNTING) -(SOLDIERS CLAMORING)
SOLDIER: Grab his arm.
(ALL GRUNTING)
(GASPING)
DUKE'S THUG 2: Aim...
(WHIMPERS)
(GRUNTS)
(GASPING)
(STRAINING)
(GRUNTING)
(GASPS)
SOLDIER 1: This way, this way!
SOLDIER 2: Whoa!
Queen Elsa!
Don't be the monster they fear you are.
(PANTING)
-(ICE TINKLING) -(GASPS)
(YELLING)
(HIGH-PITCHED WHINING)
(GROANS)
(GRUNTS)
(CHAINS RATTLING)
Oh, no. What have... What have I done?
-(DOOR UNLOCKING) -(GASPS)
Why did you bring me here?
I couldn't just let them kill you.
But I'm a danger to Arendelle.
Get Anna.
Anna has not returned.
(GASPS)
If you would just stop the winter.
Bring back summer, please.
Don't you see?
I can't.
(SIGHS)
You have to tell them to let me go.
I will do what I can.
(DOOR LOCKS)
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(WHIMPERING)
-Hey, the show's starting. -Hmm? Ah, yeah!
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
Lady and gentlemen,
good evening and welcome
to the Gulag Annual Revue Show!
Escapo, you're up after the ballet.
Okay... Mmm-hmm.
(GASPS)
Kermit! Kermit! Psst!
-Kermit. -(GASPS)
Fozzie. Walter. Animal.
We're here to rescue you.
Yes! And we've got to go right now!
Yeah!
(SOBBING)
(MELANCHOLY
CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)
Hey!
I can't believe you're here.
It's so good to see you guys!
Kermit, listen.
An evil frog named Constantine,
has taken over the Muppets
and replaced you!
What? Constantine replaced me?
WALTER: Yeah.
And he was working
together with Dominic.
They're planning something terrible,
but we don't know what.
But...
How could you not have noticed
that he'd replaced me, Fozzie?
He looked like you
and he talked like you.
Okay, he didn't talk that much
like you, come to think of it.
But he said he had a cold.
Animal know.
-"Animal know"? -Mmm-hmm.
You mean, all this time,
I've been locked in a Russian gulag,
no one, not one single person
from the Muppets except Animal
noticed I'd been replaced by
an evil criminal mastermind?
It sounds worse than it was.
No. It's as bad as it sounds.
(SIGHS)
I thought you guys
had forgotten about me.
That you didn't need me anymore.
We'd never forget about you.
We need you more than ever, Kermit.
Good frog.
-(HORN HONKS) -Late extra! Late extra! Read all about it!
Kermit and Miss Piggy
to be married in London!
(GASPS)
WALTER: What? ANIMAL: Uh-oh.
Piggy?
Piggy's gonna marry the world's
most dangerous frog tomorrow?
Piggy and the gang are in danger!
To London!
ALL: No. Kermit!
(GUNSHOTS)
Oh, yeah, I forgot. I'm in a gulag.
Sorry about that, Ivan!
It's okay!
No problem, Kermit. It's easy mistake.
Right. Thanks for not shooting me!
Sure. No problem...
Hey, nothing personal.
We need to escape, guys. Tonight!
FOZZIE: But how?
-Kermit. -(ALL EXCLAIM)
Do you know where these
prop pickaxes and shovels
are supposed to go in
this big mining number?
-KERMIT: Uh... -Wait!
(LIGHTNING CRASHES)
I've got it!
KERMIT: And now, folks,
the Great Escapo!
(STRAINING)
(GRUNTS)
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
Oh, no, you don't.
(GRUNTS)
-(GROANING) -Nice try, Escapo.
I sure hope this works, Walter.
I have tried a lot of ways to out of here.
This is gonna work, Kermit.
I'll see you on the outside.
Okay!
Gosh, I hope this works.
Oh, thank you, thank you,
everybody. And now,
we're going underground.
Working in the coal mine!
♪ Working in a coal mine
♪ Going down, down, down
♪ Working in a coal mine Whoop! About to slip down
♪ Five o'clock in morning
♪ I'm already up and gone
♪ Lord, I'm so tired
♪ How long can this go on? That I'm a...
♪ Working in a coal mine
♪ Going down, down, down
♪ Working in a coal mine Whoop! About to slip down
♪ Oh, Lord, I'm so tired
♪ Working in a coal mine Going down, down, down
♪ Working in a coal mine
♪ Whoop! About to slip down
-♪ Working -♪ In a coal mine
-♪ Going -♪ Down, down, down
-♪ And working -♪ In a coal mine
-♪ Whoops! -♪ About to slip down
♪ In a coal mine ♪
Whoo!
(CHEERING)
-Bravo! Bravo! -Bravo!
Oh, no.
Kermie!
WALTER: I can't believe that worked!
KERMIT: We did it! Great work, guys!
Now put the pedal to the metal.
We have a wedding to crash!
ALL: Yeah!
(YAWNING)
(GROANS) Water? Water!
(SCREAMS)
-(GASPS) -(WATER SPLASHES)
Crash, I told you not to drink before bed.
I didn't do this! At least not all of it.
-What's happening? -We overslept. We need to move.
What if we're the last creatures left alive?
-We'll have to repopulate the Earth! -How?
Everyone's either a dude or our brother.
SID: Oh, hi! Hey, Manny!
Wow. What a night. You'll never
guess what happened to me.
I'm gonna go out on a limb here
and say you were sleepwalking.
Oh, no, no, no. I was kidnapped
by a tribe of mini-sloths.
-That was gonna be my second guess. -And they worshipped me!
I mean, sure, they tossed me into a
flaming tar pit, but they worshipped me.
Sid, you were dreaming.
Come on. The water's rising
faster than we're moving.
I'm telling you, I was kidnapped.
I was worshipped and...
Guys! Oh, fine.
Can... Can we slow down a little?
-I'm dying here. -(VULTURE SCREECHING)
It was just a figure of speech!
They just sit there, watching us.
I wish I knew what they were thinking.
♪ Food, glorious food
♪ We're anxious to try it
♪ Three banquets a day
♪ Our favorite diet
♪ Just picture a fairy steak Fried, roasted or stewed
ALL: ♪ Oh, food, wonderful food
♪ Marvelous food
♪ Glorious food
-♪ Food, glorious food -(SCREAMS)
-♪ Poached possum served flambe -(GAGGING)
♪ Broth made from a sloth
ALL: ♪ Or a saber-tooth souffle
♪ Why should we be fated to
♪ Do noting but brood
VULTURES: ♪ On food, magical food
♪ Wonderful food, marvelous food?
(ALL SCREAMING)
♪ Food, glorious food
♪ Flesh picked off the dead ones
♪ Rank, rotten, or chewed
♪ Soon, we'll be the fed ones!
♪ Just thinking of putrid meat
♪ Puts us in a mood for
♪ Food, glorious food
-♪ Marvelous food -(SCREAMS)
♪ Fabulous food, beautiful food
♪ Magical food,
-ALL: ♪ Glorious food! ♪ -(GASPING)
There. Now you know
what they were thinking.
(ALL GROAN)
SID: ♪ Food, glorious food
-MANNY AND DIEGO: Sid! -What? It's catchy.
We made it.
Yeah, we showed those scary vultures!
-Whoo-hoo! -(LAUGHING)
-(BOTH LAUGHING) -EDDIE: Hey! (WHOOPING)
Oh!
(GLACIER CRACKING)
(SCREAMS)
(BOTH SCREAM)
Oh, it's just a little hot water and steam.
How bad could it be?
(CLUCKING)
I just did something involuntary,
and messy.
Okay, come on.
-(SCREAMS) -Manny, get back!
It's a minefield out there!
There's only one way to go.
Straight through.
Straight through?
We'd like to keep
the fur on our bodies, thank you.
We'll head back and go around.
-That's safer. -MANNY: No. No.
There's no time.
The dam will burst before we make it.
We'll drown!
ELLIE: If we go through this,
we get blown to bits.
-We go forward. -We go back!
-Forward! -Back!
-Forward! -Back!
-Can I say something? -BOTH: No!
You are so stubborn and hardheaded!
Well, I guess that proves it.
I am a mammoth!
Come on.
-Fine. -I don't know.
I don't know. Drowning sounds
like a much gentler way to go.
Blown to bits sounds so sudden.
(SCREAMS)
He's gonna get himself killed!
Manny, wait! Manny!
(SILENT EXPLOSIONS)
(MUFFLED EXPLOSIONS)
AARDVARK DAD:
Kids, look! The last mammoth!
SID: I just heard you're going extinct.
ELLIE: Bravery is just dumb. MANNY: You can't be two things!
CRASH: She thinks you're a jerk
and to go away!
BIRD: Where's your big happy family? MANNY: What if I am a last mammoth?
ELLIE: (ECHOING)
What's wrong with you?
Hey, come on! We gotta go! Now!
(EXPLOSIONS RUMBLING)
(SCREAMING)
DIEGO: That way!
(SCREAMING)
(GROANING)
(DIEGO GRUNTS)
(KRISTOFF PANTING)
(ANNA EXHALES SHARPLY)
Just hang in there.
Come on, buddy, faster!
(VOCALIZING)
Oh, boy!
Whoa! I'll meet you guys at the castle!
KRISTOFF: Stay out of sight, Olaf.
OLAF: I will!
-Hello! -WOMAN: (SCREAMS) It's alive!
It's Princess Anna!
(KRISTOFF PANTING)
(ANNA SHIVERING)
(GROANS)
(SHIVERING) Are you gonna be okay?
Don't worry about me.
-(DOOR OPENS) -WOMAN: Anna!
-You had us worried sick. -My Lady.
Get her warm. And find
Prince Hans, immediately.
We will. Thank you.
Make sure she's safe.
WOMAN: Oh, you poor girl,
you're freezing.
Oh, let's get you inside now
and get you warm.
(WHIMPERS)
(SVEN WHINING)
I'm going back out
to look for Princess Anna.
You cannot risk going out there again.
If anything happens to her...
If anything happens to the princess,
you are all Arendelle has left.
-(SIGHS) -KAI: He's in here.
Prince Hans.
Anna.
You're so cold.
-Hans, you have to kiss me. -What?
-Now! Now! -Slow down.
We'll give you two some privacy.
What happened out there?
Elsa struck me with her powers.
You said she would never hurt you.
I was wrong.
-(GROANS) -Anna.
(SHIVERING)
She froze my heart,
and only an act of true love can save me.
A true love's kiss.
Oh, Anna.
If only there was someone
out there who loved you.
What?
You said you did.
As thirteenth in line in my own kingdom,
I didn't stand a chance.
I knew I would have to marry
into the throne somewhere.
What... What are you talking about?
As heir, Elsa was preferable, of course.
But no one was getting
anywhere with her.
-But you... -Hans!
You were so desperate for love,
you were willing
to marry me just like that.
I figured after we married,
I would have to stage
a little accident for Elsa.
Hans! (GASPS) No. Stop.
But then, she doomed herself,
and you were dumb
enough to go after her.
-Please. -(CHUCKLES)
All that's left now is to kill Elsa,
and bring back summer.
You're no match for Elsa.
No, you're no match for Elsa.
I, on the other hand,
am the hero who is going to save
Arendelle from destruction.
You won't get away with this.
Oh...
I already have.
(DOOR LOCKS)
(WHIMPERING)
Please, somebody, help.
(SHIVERING CONTINUES)
Please. Please.
(ALL SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
DUKE: It's getting colder by the minute.
If we don't do something soon,
we'll all freeze to death.
Prince Hans.
Princess Anna is...
Dead.
-What? -(SPEAKING FRENCH)
What happened to her?
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
She was killed.
By Queen Elsa.
ALL: (GASP) No!
Her own sister.
At least we got to say our marriage vows
before she died in my arms.
There can be no doubt now.
Queen Elsa is a monster,
and we are all in grave danger.
Prince Hans,
Arendelle looks to you.
With a heavy heart,
I charge Queen Elsa
of Arendelle with treason.
And sentence her to death.
(SIGHS)
-(STRAINING) -GUARD 1: Hurry up!
GUARD 2: She's dangerous.
-Move quickly. -GUARD 3: Careful.
(STRAINING)
-It won't open! -GUARD 1: It's frozen shut.
GUARD 2: Put your back into it!
GUARD 4: Come on! Push!
(ALL GRUNT)
(GROWLS)
We saw the snow.
Queen Clarion, something's wrong!
The temperature,
it seems to be plummeting!
The hibiscus are halfway to hibernation!
Now, now, ministers, let's not panic.
Absolutely right.
(SCREAMS) Snow!
BOBBLE: Heave!
CLANK: Ho!
-Heave! -Ho!
Put your muscle into it, Clanky!
I'm trying, Bobble!
What happened? How did this get here?
We don't know, Miss Bell,
but it's stuck real good!
Aye, and it's making that thing bigger
by the minute!
Guys, down here!
-Come on! -Got it!
TINKER BELL: Okay, push!
(GRUNTING)
All together. All together!
Upsy-daisy.
BOBBLE: We did it!
-(ALL CHEERING) -We did it!
It's over.
Uh, I don't think it is.
QUEEN CLARION: Oh, my goodness.
The seasons have
been thrown out of balance.
MINISTER OF SPRING:
But if the temperatures
continue to drop,
it will freeze all of Pixie Hollow.
-(LOUD CRACKLING) -(ALL GASPING)
-Oh, no. -Queen Clarion, the Pixie Dust Tree.
We must hope
the tree survives the freeze.
Otherwise there will
be no more Pixie Dust.
Life in Pixie Hollow will change forever.
And no fairy will ever fly again.
Hurry. We must do everything we can.
Grab as many as you can
and head for the Pixie Dust Tree!
Hurry, guys! This way!
Hop to it! That's it!
(GRUNTING)
Snug as a bug.
-(SQUEAKING) -(GASPS) Oh, no!
(SQUEAKING)
Come on, that's it.
Just a little faster.
FAIRY MARY: That's it, fairies.
Lay the blankets along the branches,
as many as you can!
We must protect the Pixie Dust Tree!
-Miss Bell! -Tink! Do you need any help?
No! This is my last run!
I'll meet you at the tree!
(SIGHS) Everybody okay?
(CHIRPING)
Great. There you go. Nice and toasty.
You guys just stay here and keep warm.
Everything's going to be fine.
It's still alive.
Peri.
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
FOZZIE: That's a nice venue.
KERMIT: The main entrance is
too well-guarded.
I'm gonna need to get in
some other way.
Here you go.
(CLEARS THROAT)
-You're the new guy? -Yes, I am.
-Next time, wear a uniform. -Right.
(WHIMPERING)
Wow, Kermit, you were like
James Bond back there.
Thanks, Fozzie.
Okay, listen, guys.
Walter, you and Animal
go look in the chapel.
Right.
-Fozzie, you come with me. -Yes, sir.
-Good luck, guys. -You too, Kermit.
KERMIT: Piggy?
Where is she?
Kermit, these are your clothes.
-Whoa! -(MIRROR SHATTERS)
Shh!
CONSTANTINE: This tuxedo is too tight.
Someone's coming! Hide! Hide!
CONSTANTINE: Which room
am I supposed to be in?
Ah, here it is.
I hate weddings.
Hmm?
Hmm...
(GASPS)
Ha!
What the...
Ah. There you are.
Well, don't just stand there gawping,
Number Two.
Come in.
Let us take this convenient
opportunity to review our plans, hmm?
Once you've stolen the Crown Jewels
and framed the Muppets,
ring the Tower bell five times
and we will rendezvous on the roof.
But what will you do when
you're married?
Because the pig will know everything.
Once she's served their purpose, kaboom.
It will be bacon for breakfast.
(GASPS)
(LAUGHING EVILLY)
Champagne fridge delivery.
Put it over there on the bear-skin rug.
(WHIMPERING SOFTLY)
FOZZIE: Ooh!
Thank you!
It's showtime.
Fozzie, are you okay?
Yeah, I think so. How do I look?
You look fine. You look fine.
Come on, we have to go rescue
Miss Piggy!
Right! Let's go!
The Lemur! I have you finally!
And Constantine,
the world's most dangerous frog!
No, no, no.
As you might say, case sol-ved!
Perfect! Time for my annual
eight-week paid vacation.
-Au revoir. -Au revoir.
No, wait!
What am I supposed to do with them
until the mobile holding unit arrives?
On holiday!
KERMIT: No, you've got the wrong frog.
And stay there! Hmph!
(BOTH WHIMPERING)
Oh, and so you know, Number Two,
I have hired us help.
The world's smallest team
of jewel thieves.
Babies, meet your new boss.
Genius, I know! Who would suspect
babies of stealing Crown Jewels?
Look at their sweet faces.
(BLOWING RASPBERRIES)
LINK HOGTHROB: Let's see.
Where am I seated?
I'll need an usher.
Usher? ls there an usher?
Yes. I'm the Usher.
Pig or frog?
What do you think?
I don't know, man. Pig?
No. Frog. I'm related through marriage.
What kind of an usher are you?
(SIGHS)
(BABBLING INDISTINCTLY)
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
You're up, little dudes.
Go, go, go.
Down.
(GRUNTING)
Tip.
Come on! What the...
(SIGHS)
-ALL: Dominic. Hey, Dominic. -Shh.
Shut up.
(BELL TOLLING)
(GASPS)
The wedding, it's starting.
(SIGHS)
She looks beautiful.
Fozzie, we got to do something.
Oh, this is so frustrating!
Wow, would you look at that?
Now that's a poorly made car.
Let's get out of here!
(FOZZIE GRUNTS)
(GROANING)
Dewey, you've got to see this.
There must be something wrong
with the Pixie Dust Tree.
-Now don't worry... -(WIND HOWLING)
-(EXCLAIMS) -Whoa!
Careful.
I'm sure there's nothing to worry about.
Oh!
Oh, dear.
Okay, you might want to worry
just a little bit.
Tink?
Periwinkle!
(GRUNTING)
(YELLING)
(GRUNTS)
Tinker Bell! Are you okay?
Why would you fly here?
I had to.
Your jacket. Put on your jacket.
Pixie Hollow's in trouble.
There's a freeze moving in,
and the Pixie Dust Tree is in danger.
Oh, that explains it.
The pixie dust here,
it already stopped flowing.
I think there's something you can do.
Your frost, it kept the flower alive.
Oh! Oh! Oh!
Frost does that. It's like a little blanket.
It tucks the warm air inside
and keeps out the cold.
We could frost the Pixie Dust Tree
before the freeze hits it.
Uh, one question.
What about our wings?
If it's a freeze,
it will be cold enough to cross.
Then what are we waiting for?
(BOTH PANTING)
(GASPING)
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
VULTURE: Do not leave your
children unattended.
All unattended children will be eaten.
-Have you seen a mammoth? -No, sorry.
-Have you seen a mammoth? -No. No, I haven't.
-Possum about 11 foot tall? -Uh-uh.
Hey, buddy, have you seen a mammoth?
-I sure have. Big as life. -Where?
-I'm looking at him. -Not me.
Poor guy. Doesn't know he's a mammoth.
-(GLACIERS RUMBLING) -(GASPS)
-(ALL MURMURING INDISTINCTLY) -(WEDDING MARCH PLAYING)
(SOBBING) I'm just happy for them.
Really happy for them.
-Would you please stop talking? -Okay. (SNIFFLES)
(BLOWS NOSE)
Dearly beloved...
(SIGHS)
What! Code Red! Code Red!
(BABIES EXCLAIMING)
Oh, come on.
-Not a laser web. -BABY: Ooh, pretty.
Right. Go and get the
suspend-y ropey thing.
-And my really cool skintight outfit. -Yep.
Shawn, come back from vacation!
Constantine and the Lemur
have escaped.
The Crown Jewels are in danger!
We are gathered here today
to witness the union
of this pig and this frog
in Holy Matrimony before the
presence of God.
Do you, Kermit the Frog,
take Miss Piggy to be your
lawfully wedded wife,
in sickness and in health,
so help you God?
Yes. Yes, I do.
-And do you, Miss Piggy... -Hmm?
...take Kermit the Frog to be your
lawfully wedded husband,
in sickness and in health,
so help you God?
I...
(ALL GASP)
I...
(ALL GASP)
(WHISPERING) Just say "I do."
This is what
you've always wanted, right?
I do?
I'm sorry, is that a question?
No, it was not a question.
(PANTING)
We have to do something, guys.
Kermit, we've got to get you close
to Miss Piggy!
Huh. What does this do?
(YELLS)
(CROWD EXCLAIMING)
Ooh!
-What the... -Piggy, it's me, Kermit.
Come on, we have to get out of here!
The wedding is off.
Oh, wow!
Like, I kind of knew
he'd get cold flippers.
Huh? (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
Excuse us.
(ALL YELLING)
No, Kermit! What are you doing?
-Piggy, I will explain later. -I cannot believe...
-CONSTANTINE: Come here, frog! -(EXCLAIMS)
Where you going?
I'm sorry, my dear, forgive me.
MISS PIGGY: What is going on
at my wedding?
-Gotcha! -What?
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
WALTER: Animal, pull!
CONSTANTINE:
What is happening here?
Catch froggie! Catch froggie!
Well, this is the
best Muppet wedding ever!
Piggy, listen! That's not me! I'm me!
(CHEWING)
He's Constantine,
the world's most dangerous...
-(YELLS) -(ALL EXCLAIM)
(GASPS)
Two Kermits?
Well, that explains a lot.
How can there be two Kermits?
Of all the ways to ruin a wedding,
this has got to be the most creative.
Two Kermits!
No, just one Kermit. Me.
No, no, no. Do not listen to him!
I am the real Kermit.
That's ridiculous! I am Kermit the Frog!
No, I am Kermit the Frog!
Hi-lo, Kermit the Frog, here.
"Hi-lo?" It's "Hi-ho!"
Would every Kermit be quiet!
BOTH: Huh?
Well, there's only one sure way
to settle this.
First Kermit.
Will you marry me?
Yes of course, let's go!
The helicopter is waiting, my love!
And you, the other Kermit...
Will you marry me?
(STAMMERING) Well, I mean, I...
-I would. I mean, I could. It's... -(GASPS)
That's my Kermit!
-(YELLS) -(ALL GASP)
-(ALL CHEERING) -DR. TEETH: That's our frog!
Kissy-kissy!
(GLACIERS RUMBLING)
Aha!
(SNIFFING AND SIGHS)
-(CONDOR SQUAWKS) -(GASPS)
(IMITATES THROAT SLASHING)
(ICE CRACKING REVERBERATES)
(GROANS)
(GULPS)
(SCRAT SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(TOWER BELL TOLLING)
Hmm...
(ALL GASP)
That is right, Muppets!
I am Constantine,
the world's most dangerous frog
and number one criminal!
And a thousand times more frog
than this Kermit person!
And now,
I have only one thing to say to you fools!
(IMITATING KERMIT)
Good night, folks!
-(BEEPING) -(ALL CLAMORING)
Yay!
What is that?
It's a bomb!
This is where my patented magnetic
bomb-attractor vest can aid us,
that Beaker is conveniently wearing.
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
What? What's going on?
(SCREAMING)
Wait! Miss Piggy's ring is the bomb!
Whoa!
Some of you guys grab Piggy,
and some of you guys grab me.
Pull!
-(ALL GASP) -(SCREAMING)
That's only 800 years old.
(EXCLAIMING)
Nicely done, Beaker!
(YELLING)
(WHINES)
(SNORTING)
What is it, buddy?
Hey, watch it.
What's wrong with you?
(GRUNTING)
I don't understand you
when you talk like that.
(YELPS) Stop it! Put me down!
(SNORTS)
No, Sven!
-We're not going back. -(WHINES)
She's with her true love.
(SIGHS)
(WHOOSHING)
What the...
Anna!
(PANTING)
(KRISTOFF GRUNTS)
Come on! Come on, boy.
(SHIVERING)
(DOORKNOB RATTLING)
(WEAKLY) Help.
(GIGGLING)
(GASPS) Anna!
Oh, no.
(SHRIEKS)
(CONTINUES SHIVERING)
-Olaf? -(GASPS)
Olaf. Get away from there.
Wow!
So, this is heat.
I love it.
Ooh! But don't touch it.
-(ANNA GROANING) -(GRUNTING)
So, where's Hans?
What happened to your kiss?
I was wrong about him.
It wasn't true love.
But we ran all the way here.
Please, Olaf, you can't stay here.
You'll melt.
I am not leaving here until
we find some other act
of true love to save you.
Do you happen to have any ideas?
I don't even know what love is.
That's okay, I do.
Love is
putting someone else's
needs before yours.
Like, you know, how Kristoff brought you
back here to Hans and left you forever.
(GASPS) Kristoff loves me?
Wow, you really don't know
anything about love, do you?
Olaf, you're melting.
Some people are worth melting for.
(MUMBLES)
Just maybe not right this second.
(YELLS)
Don't worry, I've got it.
(PANTING)
We're gonna get through... Oh, wait.
Hang on, I'm getting something.
(GASPS) It's Kristoff and Sven!
They're coming back this way.
They... They are?
Wow! He's really moving fast.
I guess I was wrong.
I guess Kristoff doesn't love you
enough to leave you behind.
Help me up, Olaf. Please.
No, no, no! You need to
stay by the fire and keep warm.
I need to get to Kristoff.
Why?
(GASPING) Oh, I know why!
There's your act of true love right there!
Riding across the fjords
like a valiant, pungent reindeer king!
Come on!
(BOTH GASP)
OLAF: Look out!
-(GROANS) -Oh!
(OLAF PANTING)
(BOTH GASP)
Uh... Back this way.
(YELPS) We're trapped.
(GASPS)
(WHIMPERING)
(PANTING)
(SIGHS) Oh...
We're almost to the border!
(GASPING)
The Autumn Woods.
TINKER BELL: The freeze.
It's moving so fast.
Come on! We have to get to the tree!
I don't see her anywhere!
Maybe she's already on board.
(GROUND RUMBLING)
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
(WHIMPERS)
(ALL SCREAMING)
Hurry! This way! Come on! Get going!
-There it is. -Ellie, help! Whoa!
(SCREAMS)
-EDDIE: Whoa! -Come on, come on, run!
(SCREAMS)
-(GRUNTING) -Push.
-You guys gotta go. -We're not leaving you!
-I'm not asking. -Ellie, no.
(BOTH GRUNTING)
Ellie, don't worry! We're going for help!
-Stay here! -ELLIE: Duh!
(ALL SHOUTING)
-Help us! -Help!
Somebody help... Manny!
EDDIE: Manny!
CRASH: Manny! EDDIE: It's Ellie!
She's trapped in the cave!
(SQUEALS)
Whoa! (GIGGLES)
Slide, Anna!
(ANNA BREATHING HEAVILY)
(BOTH SHRIEK)
(OLAF VOCALIZING)
(GROANS)
We made it!
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!
(FLOODWATERS RUMBLING)
(ALL YELL)
(ALL SCREAMING)
Whoa!
(WHIMPERING)
(GASPS)
(GRUNTING)
-Ellie! -Manny?
-(PANTING) -(GRUNTING)
Come on, buddy, faster.
(ANNA GROANING)
Kristoff!
(OLAF PANTING)
Keep going!
Kristoff!
Come on!
(SHIVERING)
(WHIMPERING)
No.
Kermit! Help!
-Piggy! -Help!
She's on the roof!
Shut up and keep moving, pig!
You are my insurance policy!
Huh?
Number Two, you look ridiculous.
Why are you wearing that?
Because I am the Lemur.
And the world's
new number one criminal.
That's right.
This is where I double-cross you.
First rule of double-cross.
You don't announce the double-cross
before you double-cross.
It's not even a rule
because it is so obvious.
-(BEEPING) -(SCREAMS)
The Lemur is literally the worst bad guy
name I have ever heard!
Let's go!
(STRUGGLING)
Oh, no!
He's getting away!
What are we gonna do?
I'm gonna stop that helicopter.
(ALL CLAMORING)
We're coming! Hang on, Miss Piggy!
Jump!
-(WHIMPERING) -Shut up, pig!
Kermit!
We have to do something!
I got it!
There's only one way
we can reach him up there!
Muppet Ladder!
-What the... -Kermit!
That's it, Clanky.
Queen Clarion, it's not working.
The wind, it's too strong!
(ROARING)
Tinker Bell.
Queen Clarion! They can help.
Our frost, it covers like a blanket.
It can protect the tree.
Do it.
-Help! -I'll save you!
(GROANS)
Great. Who's gonna save him?
You really need to brush.
(GROANS) Okay, okay, okay.
Jump in, now!
(GROANS) Come on, fraidy cat.
Come on! You can do this,
you can do this, you can do this.
EDDIE: No!
Trust your instincts. Attack the water.
I am not your prey. I am not your prey.
I am not your prey!
(YELLS)
(GASPS)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GASPING)
Uh-huh. Attack the water.
Stalking the prey. Claw! Kick!
Even babies can do it! Come on!
Claw! Kick! Claw! Kick!
Hey! I'm stalking the prey!
(SCREAMS)
CRASH: Eddie!
(PANTING)
You did it, buddy.
You kicked water's butt.
Nothing to it. Most animals
can swim as babies, you know.
Yeah, but not tigers. I left that part out.
(PANTING)
(GRUNTING)
Whoa!
(YELLS) Whoa!
Sven... Sven!
(GRUNTING)
Good boy.
Come on up, Chef!
Watch the hair, bear.
Give up, Constantine. I've got you now!
Bad move, frog.
-(SCREAMS) -Kermit!
Okay, Kermit, we're coming to get you.
Now!
-ALL: Whoa! -Whoa!
No, something's wrong.
We're not moving.
(ALL STRAINING)
You're ruining my getaway!
(MISS PIGGY GASPS)
(INHALES DEEPLY)
What? (GRUNTS)
There he is!
Ellie! Hold on to me!
(PANTING)
(ELLIE GROANING MUFFLY)
(ALL GASP)
Oh, no.
It's getting colder.
Let's hand out the blankets.
They'll keep us warm!
Hurry, Peri. Hurry!
-(GASPS) -Manny! Manny, behind you!
(INHALES DEEPLY)
There they are!
-Whoo-hoo! -EDDIE: They made it!
(WHOOPING)
(GRUNTING)
We thought we'd never see you again.
We're gonna live!
We're gonna die!
-(GASPING) -(CRAGS RUMBLING)
(MAMMALS SCREAMING)
(ALL CLAMORING)
(ALL SHOUTING)
That's it. There you go!
Make sure to cover your wings!
The tree! It's too big.
We're never going to make it.
I'm sorry.
(OWL TWITTERING)
(FAIRIES LAUGHING EXCITEDLY)
Whoopsie! Ha!
Lord Milori.
We've come to help.
Now, you didn't think
I was going to let you
do this all by yourself, now did you?
The tree should be our top priority.
But any fairy we can spare
should try to frost the other seasons.
Start at the freeze line
and spread out to Spring and Summer.
The rest of you, cover the tree!
FAIRY MARY: Oh, my goodness.
Look, Bobble! The snowy owls!
Ah!
Thank you.
Stay warm.
Oh.
Now!
(SHIVERING)
(GASPING)
(WEAKLY) Kristoff.
-Kristoff... -Anna...
Anna!
(GASPING)
Elsa! You can't run from this!
Just take care of my sister.
Your sister?
She returned from the mountain
weak and cold.
She said that you froze her heart.
No.
I tried to save her, but it was too late.
Her skin was ice. Her hair turned white.
Your sister is dead.
Because of you.
No.
(WHIMPERING)
(SOBBING)
We've done all we can. Join the others.
The freeze is upon us.
You must take cover.
Follow me.
Oh, I hope it works.
CLANK: Tink!
Will everything be all right?
I don't know.
I've never seen anything like this.
(SHIVERS)
Thank you, Milori.
Please, take cover.
Winter Fairies, stand guard.
(GRUNTING)
(EDDIE YELLS)
(ALL GASP)
(SHIVERING)
(GASPS)
Kristoff.
(BREATHING HEAVILY) Anna!
Hang on, Piggy! I'm coming!
Go get 'em, Kermit!
(GRUNTS)
Kermie!
Welcome aboard, Kermit.
You don't know
who you're dealing with.
I am the world's most dangerous frog.
(SWORD UNSHEATHING)
Elsa?
(GRUNTING)
(PANTING)
(GRUNTS)
No!
(GRUNTS)
Oh, brother!
You may be the
world's most dangerous frog,
but you're still a frog!
No one tricks me into marrying them
and then hurts my Kermie!
Ha!
(WHIMPERS)
(GROANS)
(SCREAMS)
D'oh!
(SCREAMS)
(RUMBLING)
(GROANING)
(EXHALES)
(GASPS) Anna!
Oh. Anna!
No, no!
Please, no.
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(SOBBING)
Anna?
(SOBBING CONTINUES)
(GROANING)
What a woman!
Yeah. My woman.
And I believe this belongs to you.
(GROANS)
Well, I'm sorry I ruined the wedding.
Oh, Kermie.
I'm so glad you did.
ROWLF: Okay. Can we get down now?
-(SIRENS APPROACHING) -We did it, guys!
(ALL CHEERING)
SCOOTER: What an action sequence!
LEW ZEALAND: You sure look pretty,
Miss Piggy.
Thank you.
What a beautiful sight.
(CHEERING)
It worked! It worked, Tinker Bell.
Oh, thank goodness!
We did it.
(CHANTING)
Whoa!
Oh!
CLANK: Come on, everyone!
(LAUGHTER)
Congratulations, weirdos,
you've saved the Crown Jewels!
And you've caught
my nemesis, the Lemur.
Look at his little costume.
That's adorable!
-I'm not adorable. -He is adorable.
You're adorable!
Did you make that kitty-cat outfit?
The bad guy is Dominic Badguy!
Well, mon ami, I guess this is where
we say goodbye.
You go your way, and I go mine.
(SOBBING) Here comes the rain.
Oh, boy.
And I said I wasn't going to do this.
Oh, pull yourself together, man.
Stop crying.
We're only saying our final farewell.
Goodbye, forever! (SOBBING)
I'm going to miss you so much!
I'm going to miss you, my French friend.
(ALL GROANING)
Whenever you're ready.
-Yes. -Yes, of course.
-Take them away! -Take them away!
-DOMINIC: Thank you. -Au revoir, Muppets.
-Bye-bye. -See you!
DOMINIC: ♪ You're number two
-Sam. -CONSTANTINE: Shut up.
Sam! Wait for me!
Tink! Come on!
Tink?
What's wrong?
(GASPS) Oh!
When you flew to Winter,
that's why you fell.
Oh, no.
Oh, Tinker Bell.
Tink.
Why didn't you tell me?
We had to save the tree.
Besides, there's no cure
for a broken wing.
I'm so sorry.
This happened
because we tried to keep you apart.
QUEEN CLARION: But never again.
You belong together.
(SIGHS)
TINKER BELL: It's getting warmer.
You should get back to Winter.
Yeah.
I'll be okay.
I'll meet you tomorrow at the border.
Sisters?
Sisters.
BOTH: Jingles!
(BOTH LAUGH)
(GASPS)
(GASPING)
Uh... Eh...
That's a new chapter.
(GASPS)
(GASPS) Anna?
(SIGHS)
Oh, Elsa.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Okay, that was amazing.
Miss Bell, you are fantastic!
Oh! Queen Clarion!
I didn't know they were going to do
the smoochy, smoochity.
Guess they're telling people now.
You sacrificed yourself for me?
I love you.
(GASPS) "An act of true love
will thaw a frozen heart."
"Love will thaw."
Love. Of course.
Elsa?
Love!
(GASPS)
(PEOPLE MURMURING IN AWE)
I knew you could do it.
Hands down,
this is the best day of my life.
And, quite possibly, the last.
Oh, Olaf! Hang on, little guy.
Oh, oh, oh!
(GASPS)
My own personal flurry! (GIGGLES)
(CHUCKLES)
Hey, Manny.
(CHATTERING)
Whee-hah!
-I'm not leaving! -Grandpa, let go of the boat!
-The flood's over! -GRANDPA: This is my boat now!
-Come on, let's go! Come on, come on! -(CHIRPING)
(LAUGHS) Stu! We made it!
We're gonna live!
Well, I am, anyway.
(SIGHS)
You know, I missed all of you so much.
NADYA: There he is, right there!
Arrest him! Arrest that frog!
Nadya? Wait. For what?
For leading the largest mass
break-out in Gulag history.
You will get 30 years. Maybe 50.
-But... -No "buts," Kermit.
You didn't finish Gulag Annual Revue,
and you didn't even say goodbye.
-What? -What?
You are coming with me. Now, move!
(STAMMERING) Fellas, listen. Easy.
No, no, no! Kermit!
Wait!
We're sorry, Kermit.
We're sorry that we didn't
notice you were missing.
We're sorry we didn't tell you
often enough
how much you mean to all of us.
We're sorry
we ever took you for granted.
But that's never going to happen again.
Because if Kermit has to go back
to the gulag,
you'll have to take me, too.
No.
You're my best friend, Kermit.
Wherever you go, I go.
You'll have to take me, too.
And me.
GONZO: Kermit, we convinced
ourselves that
evil frog was you
because he gave us what we
thought we wanted.
When what we really wanted...
What we really needed...
Was you, Kermit.
The actual, real you.
It would appear you were right, Kermit.
I guess this is our family.
And families belong together.
-You are free to go. -(ALL GASP)
Forever.
(ALL CHEERING)
Kermit, did you hear that? We're free!
Nadya, thank you! Great!
That's wonderful!
Wait!
Hey, guys, listen.
We still have to finish our world tour.
And I know where we need to play next.
For one night only,
Siberia, Russia!
(ALL CHEERING)
Yes, yes!
I'll pack my swimsuit right away!
Oh, wonderful!
It's terrible. You will hate it.
You will hate it.
(HANS GROANS)
Uh-uh-uh-uh.
Anna?
But she froze your heart.
The only frozen heart
around here is yours.
-(GRUNTS) -(SCREAMS)
(ALL CHEERING)
-Wonderful! -(ALL EXCLAIMING IN JOY)
(BOTH SIGH)
-(GRUNTS) -(CHUCKLES)
(LAUGHING)
-(KIDS LAUGHING) -JAMES: I'm gonna catch you!
I'm thinking about
starting a swim school.
Sid's Squids.
-(SCREAMS) -Huh?
All hail Fire King!
Uh, hi.
Hi-hi-hi! Hi! Hi!
Fire King avert flood.
Join us, O great and noble flaming one.
Hmm!
Ho! No. Not so fast there! Okay?
You make a quality offer...
but Fire King has a prior commitment.
His herd need him.
He is the gooey, sticky...
stuff that holds us together.
He made this herd and...
we'd be nothing without him.
You mean it? Oh!
Sid! Sid, I'm... (GROANS)
That doesn't mean "want to touch."
(ALL SIGHING)
(SIGHS) Don't ask.
(RUMBLING)
(MAMMOTHS TRUMPETING)
AARDVARK KIDS: Whoa!
We're not the last ones anymore!
You're not coming?
You wanna go with them?
I am a mammoth.
I should probably be with a mammoth.
Don't you think?
Yes, unless...
Unless?
Unless I, uh...
I just wanna say...
I need to tell you...
I hope you find everything
you're looking for.
You too.
Manny?
You've come a long way since we met,
and I'll take full credit for that.
But you need to let go of the past
so you can have a future.
Go after her.
It's okay.
We'll always be here for you.
I'll keep in touch.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're a...
You're a good friend.
Point made. Now go on. Scat.
Our Manny's growing up.
Ellie! Ellie!
Manny!
-(GASPS) -Ellie.
I don't want us to be together
because we have to.
I want us to be together
because we want to.
And I wanna be with you, Ellie.
-So, what do you say? -Oh, Manny.
-(BRANCH CRACKING) -I thought you were gonna... Oh!
(EXHALES)
(LAUGHS)
You're possum enough for me.
(ALL TRUMPETING)
(BOTH SOBBING)
(BLOWS NOSE)
Well, it's just you and me now.
Two bachelors knocking about
in the wild. Whoo-hoo.
Fine. But I'm not gonna carry you.
I still have my pride, you know.
Oh, come on, buddy. For old times' sake?
MANNY: I'll carry him.
-But your herd's leaving. -We are now.
-EDDIE: Shotgun! -(CRASH WHOOPING)
Manny, who do you like better?
-Me or Diego? -Diego. It's not even close.
Ha-ha! Told ya.
ELLIE: Manny, you can't choose
between your kids.
He's not my kid. He's not even my dog.
If I had a dog, and my dog had a kid,
and the dog's kid had a pet
that would be Sid.
-Can I have a dog, Manny? -No.
-Ellie, can I have a dog? -Of course you can, sweetie.
Ellie, we have to
be consistent with him.
RECEPTIONIST: Next!
Uh, maybe you should go first.
(CLEARS THROAT) Next.
Ugh! All right.
Ooh! Would you look at that.
(EXCLAIMS)
Oh!
Ooh!
That feels good.
SAILOR: Setting course, sir.
(GROANS)
I will return this
scoundrel to this country.
We shall see what the 12 big
brothers think of his behavior.
Arendelle thanks you, milord.
This is unacceptable.
I am a victim of fear.
I've been traumatized.
Ah! My neck hurts.
Is there a doctor that I could see?
(STAMMERS)
And I demand to see the queen!
Oh. I have a message from the queen.
"Arendelle will henceforth and forever
"no longer do business
of any sort with Weaseltown."
"Weselton."
-It's Weselton! -SOLDIER: Let's go.
Come on, come on, come on!
(STAMMERING)
Okay, okay, here I come.
-(GRUNTS) Pole! -Whoops! Sorry.
Okay, Okay.
Here we are. Oh!
-(SQUEALS EXCITEDLY) -(GASPS)
ANNA: I owe you a sled.
-Are you serious? -Yes!
And it's the latest model.
No, I can't accept this.
You have to. No returns.
No exchanges. Queen's orders.
She's named you the Official
Arendelle Ice Master and Deliverer.
-What? That's not a thing. -Oh, sure it is.
And it even has a cup holder.
Do you like it?
Like it? I love it!
-Whoa. -(KRISTOFF CHUCKLES)
I could kiss you!
I could. I mean, I'd like to. I'd...
(STAMMERS) May I? We me.
I mean, may we?
Wait, what?
We may.
Mmm.
Summer!
(GIGGLING)
(GASPS) Ooh...
Hello. (CHUCKLES)
(SNIFFS)
(EXHALES)
(GASPING)
(SNEEZING)
-(GASPS) -(SLURPS)
(SQUEALS)
(WHIMPERS)
-(BELLOWS) -(CHUCKLING)
(WHOOPING)
Look out! Runaway bunny!
(LAUGHING)
-Sorry. -It's okay.
Hey, little buddy.
From Dewey?
It's what my friends call me.
(CHUCKLES)
Wow!
(STUTTERING)
I love your work.
I have so many questions for you.
Okay, you can let go of my hand now.
-Hi. -(GASPS)
Hello there.
-I'm Sled. -Oh, my. That's perfect! Oh!
(GIGGLING)
I'm Rosetta.
Rosetta. That's beautiful.
Oh, my.
Oh, Miss Gliss!
An acorn!
Biggest one we could find.
I love it!
She likes acorns.
Must be a Winter thing.
Not really.
Tink.
You ready?
Ready.
Are you ready?
(ALL CHEERING)
(BOTH WHISTLING)
(ALL GASP)
-KID: Ice! -(ALL MUTTERING EXCITEDLY)
(CROWD APPLAUDING)
(ALL CHEERING)
Ooh!
Lovely!
-(APPLAUDING) -(WOMAN LAUGHING)
WOMAN: Ooh! Whoo-hoo...
Swing me. (CHUCKLES)
Ooh... (WHIMPERS)
(BOTH LAUGHING)
I like the open gates.
We are never shutting them again.
(ANNA GASPS)
Oh, Elsa, they're beautiful,
but you know I don't skate.
Come on! You can do it!
KRISTOFF: Look out.
Reindeer coming through.
I got it, I got it.
I don't got it, I don't got it.
Hey, guys!
-That's it, Olaf. -(OLAF CHUCKLES)
Glide and pivot. And glide and pivot.
ELSA: Go. (LAUGHS)
(ALL LAUGHING)
KERMIT: Okay, guys, this is it.
The Gulag Finale!
Here we go!
A-one, two, three, four!
♪ Together again, again
♪ Gee, it's good to be together again, again
♪ I just can't imagine that you've ever been gone
♪ It's not starting over It's just going on
♪ Together again, again
♪ Now we're here
♪ And there's no need remembering when
♪ Because no feeling feels like that feeling
♪ Together again
♪ Again, again, again!
Whoo-hoo!
♪ Together again, again
♪ Gee, it's good to be together again, again
♪ I just can't imagine that you've ever been gone
♪ It's not starting over
♪ It's just going on
♪ Together again, again
♪ Now we're here
♪ And there's no need remembering when
♪ 'Cause no feeling feels like that feeling
♪ Together again
♪ Again
(SINGING IN RUSSIAN)
♪ I just can't imagine that you've ever been gone
♪ It's not starting over It's just going on
♪ Together again, again
♪ Gee, it's good to be together again, again
♪ 'Cause no feeling feels like that feeling
♪ Together a-...
♪ Together a-...
♪ Together again! ♪
Okay, Nadya, this is it. Your solo.
NADYA: Kermit!
(CHORUS VOCALIZING)
-(CLANKS) -(GROANS)
(GROANING)
(GASPS)
(SIGHS)
(GASPS AND SIGHS)
(GASPS)
(GROANS AND GRUNTING)
-(WIND HOWLING) -Huh?
(WHIMPERING)
(BARKING AND YELLING)
(GRUNTING AND GROANING)
(YELLS)
(SCREAMING)
(GROANING)
I saved you, little buddy!
(GASPS AND GRUNTING)
Huh?
(GRUNTS)
-(YELLING) -Okay...
I saved you, little buddy. Remember? I...
Ow! Ow!
-Ow! -(SCRAT YELLING)
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
(FIREWORKS WHISTLING)
WOMAN: ♪ I never knew
I lost you till I found you
♪ And I never guessed
how close you were to me
♪ Now I want to
throw my arms around you
♪ Tell a thousand tales
that will astound you
♪ Everything about you
tells me this was meant to be
♪ Don't you see?
I'm on your side
♪ Let's take this ride
♪ And together we're facing the world
♪ Doing things nobody's done before
♪ And the great divide
♪ Doesn't seem so wide
♪ Anymore
So, is it true that glaciers are stealthy?
You're sitting on one now, man.
CLANK: (LAUGHING) Sneaky glacier.
♪ I can't recall what life was like
without you
♪ Now it feels as though
we've never been apart
♪ Tell me every tiny thing about you
♪ Anything you'll say
I'll never doubt you
♪ We're meant to be together
I can feel it in my heart
♪ It's just the start
♪ I'm on your side
♪ Let's take this ride
♪ And together we're facing the world
♪ Doing things nobody's done before
♪ And the great divide
♪ Doesn't seem so wide
♪ And if you'll be there
beside me when I falter
♪ Then whatever comes I know
we'll take it all in stride
♪ I'm on your side
♪ The great divide
♪ It doesn't seem so wide
♪ I'm on your side
♪ Let's take this ride
♪ And together we're facing the world
♪ Doing things nobody's done before
♪ And the great divide
♪ Doesn't seem so wide
♪ Anymore ♪
(MINI-SLOTHS VOCALIZING)
(VOCALIZING CONTINUES)
(LIVELY INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING)
(ENCHANTING INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING)
(DREAMY INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING)
(GROANING)
Oh!
(SIGHS)
(SIGHS)